Frank Hovis Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 There have been a few on here who have said about having to resist pressure from their OH / family to buy a house at current prices. Keep resisting. This guy sounded like he was a great bloke. Bike club founder Mark Churchill found dead after new house 'anxiety'POPULAR cyclist Mark Churchill, who co-founded the Bigfoot Mountain Bike Club, was found dead by his mother after he had become stressed about moving house. The 45-year-old went through with a house purchase with his wife Amanda but confided with his GP that he felt great anxiety about it. He was found hanged at the couple’s new home in Gambier Parry Gardens, in Longford, on September 30 last year – just hours after visiting the doctor who he had told he would not kill himself because it would hurt ‘too many close relatives’. An inquest into his death at Gloucester Coroners Court on Thursday heard how Amanda has increased their offer on the house without his consent. Dr Richard Webster, from Longlevens Surgery, said: “He wasn’t happy with the move. Although it was a good house he could not get excited about it. He was suffering from palpitations. “I asked if he had suicidal thoughts and he said he did but he would not carry them out because he has got too many close relatives who would be hurt. “On September 30 I saw him again and he was slightly better. He was sleeping a bit but had no motivation to do anything. He had been less critical of his wife and his in-laws. “He seemed generally a little better than on his last visit. I was very shocked and saddened to hear that he took his life later the same day.” His father Brian, who sat alongside his mother Margaret at the inquest, said: “On a number of occasions he was obviously very depressed then he could be completely different within one hour. “I think the change in property price caused anxiety because he had no say in the matter and his wife’s parents had been quite a driving force in the increase in the offer.” The new offer was still less than what the couple had been paying in rent. Mr and Mrs Churchill have not spoken to Mark’s wife since the funeral and she did not attend the inquest, which heard she had suffered psychological problems since her husband’s death. An open conclusion was recorded because coroner David Dooley could not be sure whether his death was accidental or a suicide. http://www.gloucestercitizen.co.uk/Bike-club-founder-Mark-Churchill-dead-new-house/story-20631462-detail/story.html That old "pay any price because mortgage rates are low" attitude being used to push people into huge debt, and a guy who saw how he was jeopardising his future with such a massive debt but was under too much pressure to be able to say no. Great shame and I genuinely think had he found this forum he would have had the support to just say "no". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Executive Sadman Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 heard how Amanda has increased their offer on the house without his consent. Pretty dumb thing to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikthe20 Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 heard how Amanda has increased their offer on the house without his consent. Pretty dumb thing to do. If it was a bloke who'd done this to his wife he'd now be accused of bullying and abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkey Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 If it was a bloke who'd done this to his wife he'd now be accused of bullying and abuse. It would be emotional rape, that would turn into rape, then manslaughter with rape. He'd get a custodial sentence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Executive Sadman Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 What gets me is how its framed as bad that 'he could not get exited about it' ie, how dare he be level headed and distance himself from it emotionally. Thats how they've got the hooks in peoples mouths, get them emotionally attached, must buy at any price, its not just a pile of bricks, its 'your life'. Obviously worked in his wives case. Well, now you have your dream house love. Was it worth it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Masked Tulip Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 I can relate to this in some way. I date someone many years ago who just kept wanting us - i.e. me - to buy a big house. As I was the much bigger wage earner the onus for the mortgage would have been on myself and, frankly, everytime she talked about it I just became more and more stressed. The thought of having to service that mortgage would have been a killer. In hindsight, now, we would have a house worth double the original asking price... assuming that I was still alive. So I can relate to this guy's anxiety and feel really sorry for him. A GP friend of mine once told me that lots of widows have driven their men to early graves over houses and maintenance on houses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bloo Loo Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 The monthly rent was more than the mortgage they say....but....it probably cleared out the one thing that gave the man some semblance of confidence...CASH in the bank...available just in case. Course, he should have realised that being unable to pay the mortgage is the height of fashion these days..and that includes the lenders too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
underscored Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 If it was a bloke who'd done this to his wife he'd now be accused of bullying and abuse. Mrs Underscored was very firm with me when I started looking to buy after we sprogged. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dorkins Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 “He seemed generally a little better than on his last visit. I was very shocked and saddened to hear that he took his life later the same day.” This is surprisingly common in suicide cases. When the person is at their lowest ebb emotionally they may have the desire to end their own life but lack the motivation needed to plan and carry it out. It's when things improve a little that they are really in the danger zone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartinE Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 ....cheaper than rent... Ramping even in when they know it killed him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Masked Tulip Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 This is surprisingly common in suicide cases. When the person is at their lowest ebb emotionally they may have the desire to end their own life but lack the motivation needed to plan and carry it out. It's when things improve a little that they are really in the danger zone. They say that heart attacks are like that - someone works themselves silly for months or years without a break, finally takes a few days off and BAM! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quiet Guy Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 heard how Amanda has increased their offer on the house without his consent. Pretty dumb thing to do. But this act that brought such anxiety to the poor man also brought joy and happiness into the world. High-fives all round at the estate agents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
@contradevian Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 heard how Amanda has increased their offer on the house without his consent. Would that be legally binding? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartinE Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Well he would need to report her fraud - unlikely. Hope the life assurance was up to date. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bland Unsight Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 I can relate to this in some way. I date someone many years ago who just kept wanting us - i.e. me - to buy a big house. As I was the much bigger wage earner the onus for the mortgage would have been on myself and, frankly, everytime she talked about it I just became more and more stressed. The thought of having to service that mortgage would have been a killer. In hindsight, now, we would have a house worth double the original asking price... assuming that I was still alive. So I can relate to this guy's anxiety and feel really sorry for him. A GP friend of mine once told me that lots of widows have driven their men to early graves over houses and maintenance on houses. Good to see you back on the boards. For what it's worth, even if the price did what you suggest, it's worth would have changed little on any measure worth a damn and certainly it's worth would not have doubled. I'll accept that the money price doubled. But when money price and worth are freely interchangeable then you're letting the market do more than it can do - and what it can do is, to borrow a phrase, "tell you the price of lunch". What it should do is a different question, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
council dweller Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Well, I must say my wife has never attempted to push me into buying and is even more reluctant to buy than I am. Her parents have not once suggested any such thing even.... Mind you, being as they`re all Japanese probably has something to do with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ah-so Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 He would have topped himself eventually. Just a matter of time until something triggered him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
okaycuckoo Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 There's a lot to be read into that story Wife then developed psychological problems. Blaming her and her parents for his personal decision. Wonder who he blamed in the suicide note. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason the 4th Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Poor sod. Must be awful to feel that you have no way out other than that. . . . . . . .and all over bricks and mortar!. RIP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
19 year mortgage 8itch Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Terribly sad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dkujsbap Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 I wonder how many more cases like this will pop up over the next few years? I've thankfully never had depression or suicidal tendencies but definitely feel the same kind of pressure from my mother as I did as a teen when taking my exams. Luckily I've convinced my boomer father that renting is the best situation for me and my girlfriend at this stage of my life. But I can see a lot of the young feeling this type of pressure, either suicide because they can't afford a house or suicide as they feel peer pressured into it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Masked Tulip Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 They purchased the house so the wife now has her house. He committed suicide - would insurance pay out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartinE Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Depends on the policy but probably. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SarahBell Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Would that be legally binding? No. Until he signed paperwork for presumably mortgage and exchange. Inability to deal wi his wife and presumably the n laws. And yes you need to per up a bit to kill yourself. Why Prozac got a bad name cos it wasn't a zombie drug and actually put some life into you .. Suicide isn't a rational response to anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zugzwang Posted February 14, 2014 Share Posted February 14, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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