Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 6 minutes ago, Insane said: Yes understood that is true. I was thinking along the lines of women only having children when they had found this higher value (financially) partner and thinking well many won't if they are earning more than the men. I think that's an issue. Lots of highly paid single women and poor single men Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jiltedjen Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 2 minutes ago, Si1 said: I think that's an issue. Lots of highly paid single women and poor single men Time makes it all marry up. womens desperation levels rise with age, and standards fall. I have known this happen with a highly paid vet getting together with a low level farm labourer, all it took was time and age to do it’s thing. there really is someone out there for everyone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeanutButter Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 3 minutes ago, Si1 said: I think that's an issue. Lots of highly paid single women and poor single men Women have better educational outcomes and study further. They naturally* prefer partners with a similar background, which narrows their pool as the years progress and more potential suitors are eliminated. *Studies have shown that similar background is a big factor in duration of relationship. We could work harder at providing boys, particularly working class white boys, with the support they need to study further, but what would be the point when they're only going to come out laden with debt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 11 minutes ago, Si1 said: I think that's an issue. Lots of highly paid single women and poor single men Yes. Things have changed massively which is fine but are we really ready for house husbands I am not sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 11 minutes ago, jiltedjen said: womens desperation levels rise with age, and standards fall. I have known this happen with a highly paid vet getting together with a low level farm labourer, all it took was time and age to do it’s thing. It might not just be desperation. I knew a woman who had such a high end job the company provided her with a Chauffer. She left her husband for the Chauffer neither she or the Chauffer were desperate they had both had children and a choice of partners in the past. It was love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 10 minutes ago, Insane said: Yes. Things have changed massively which is fine but are we really ready for house husbands I am not sure. I think it's more likely, and I see, the husband still working but earning less than the wife. Tbf it's psychologically unhealthy to be a stay at home husband OR wife imho. And them sharing the chores. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 18 minutes ago, PeanutButter said: *Studies have shown that similar background is a big factor in duration of relationship. This rings very very true. If you have a similar background then you literally speak the same verbal and body language and have the same values. Much easier relating to someone without having to constantly explain yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 2 minutes ago, Si1 said: I think it's more likely, and I see, the husband still working but earning less than the wife. Tbf it's psychologically unhealthy to be a stay at home husband OR wife imho. And them sharing the chores. Well it is all changing. But I have said recently I have heard many women regretting the career path. The woman who left her husband for the Chauffer was one of them. I think she would have preferred the part time job when younger and had 4 children instead of 1. Then there are those who think they would have had it better not being at home. It goes for both men and woman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 19 minutes ago, Insane said: Well it is all changing. But I have said recently I have heard many women regretting the career path. The woman who left her husband for the Chauffer was one of them. I think she would have preferred the part time job when younger and had 4 children instead of 1. Then there are those who think they would have had it better not being at home. It goes for both men and woman. Yeah fair enough. Overall I think the dynamic hasn't really changed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeanutButter Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 Hear me out, this is my gut feeling. The risk appetite of women is very different from men (in broad terms). Think about it. They are better at studying (applying themselves) precisely because education minimises the risk of poverty, the risk of being married/bearing children young, and the risk of having to rely on someone who may leave the woman pregnant or with children to fend for herself. They are also more biddable, at least until puberty. The risk of not being able to have children at all is far, far down the road and not worth worrying about at that point. Once the post-education career pathway unfolds everything chugs along, box ticking and raising their disposable income and personal freedom. Again, this is safe. This is predictable. They do not have surges of testosterone driving them forward to find a mate or compete with others. Instead, they network, forming strong friendships with other women and gay men. Then the maternal hormones kick in. The much derided baby urge. It's real, no matter how unwoke it sounds. Suddenly, the various losers and hookups take a different dimension. No more time wasting. But now the pool is limited, many men are already married and fathers by now, many are committed to playing the field, some are divorced and wary of repeating mistakes. A good number want someone younger. The risk of not passing on DNA looms larger, the biological impulse creates a weight of stress. Depression etc. All that education, all that striving, and for what? They believed what they were told. Young women need to be told the truth about their fertility. There's a window. It starts wide and it closes over time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FANG Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 I once asked a wise man from New York, What's it all about Handsome Dick, And he said Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Spaniard Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 2 hours ago, Insane said: By the way you seem to just value everything on money, we need money just to get up out of bed and take a piss each morning however not all value is money. That reminded me of the Oscar Wilde quote about value from The Picture of Dorian Gray: “Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A.steve Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 If there's to be a marriage market, perhaps there should be better credit facilities so all those dissatisfied with their options can make choices they couldn't otherwise afford. What could possibly go wrong? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
satsuma Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 It's something I am concerned about for my children, that they would end up with an arsehole because they gave the arsehole credence as the person had money. On the flip side, as an old fart I would be wary of young women with pert tits, what are they after? Money maybe. I would like to think they see me as a seasoned veteran and love me for it. The problem it I just see snakes with tits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desiringonlychild Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 (edited) 5 hours ago, TenYearToGetMyMoneyBack said: About time too. I have mentioned before my admiration of the Singapore Governments attempts to match up intelligent people. It is about time they started pointing out in schools that (girls especially) can't marry the class clown then expect to do well in life (maybe they can if his name is Russell Brand, but you get my idea). Working in engineering where 90% of the workforce is male I know lots of men who are well paid and have their own houses but have basically given up on having relationship because they come in the category of "Nerds" and didn't look like George Michael when younger. I actually came very close to falling into that trap myself but luckily I suspect women become less fussy as they get older. I am a product of a 'match' made by the Singapore government. My parents met at a disco organized for accounting and engineering graduates in the 1980s. Mum (accounting graduate) went for the free food and met my dad (engineering graduate) there and they married 3 years later. Neither of them had a previous relationship. Dad owned a house which he bought with his parents so the housing part was sorted. My sister is a doctor and I went to law school (now work in financial services). I married my classmate in law school (for love) who is from a poor family but in a way the reason why I own today is because of his family not mine as his mum let us live rent free in his childhood home in London. I suppose that is the equivalent of a £50k gift or perhaps even more if you add up the cost of rent and bills for 3 years which she refused to let us pay. So I guess moral of the story is marry someone who is rich or if you don't want to, marry someone with nice parents who also own a house in London Edited July 22, 2023 by desiringonlychild Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob8 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 5 hours ago, jiltedjen said: I don’t agree i dated maybe 12 women over the years. I only met two who would of made good wife material. the first was too good for me. I wasn’t good enough for her (she went on to do much better than me) the second I married. All the rest with a bit of common sense I could tell where not wife material. you can’t choose wrong if you engage your brain, certain women are not cheats, are not bad. I do dislike to see guys blame it on the women, you picked her, it’s mostly your fault. My general rule of thumb is that people who think they are gurus on relationships tend to have long suffering spouses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Cash Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 2 hours ago, Insane said: Yes. Things have changed massively which is fine but are we really ready for house husbands I am not sure. I’ve had no major problems being a house husband. There are quite a few of us around now. In our circle of friends there are several house husbands. Many successful career women have to have a house husband to complement their career demands. I had enough spare time for small volunteering roles and the occasional temporary job, but my primary role was raising our children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 8 minutes ago, Nick Cash said: There are quite a few of us around now. In our circle of friends there are several house husbands. Many successful career women have to have a house husband to complement their career demands. I had enough spare time for small volunteering roles and the occasional temporary job, but my primary role was raising our children. Well done good for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 44 minutes ago, desiringonlychild said: , marry someone with nice parents who also own a house in London That last bit did make me laugh thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Cash Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 5 minutes ago, Insane said: Well done good for you. Almost everyone on this thread has a different take on how to get the perfect partner. Just shows how many different routes there potentially are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insane Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 1 minute ago, Nick Cash said: Almost everyone on this thread has a different take on how to get the perfect partner. Just shows how many different routes there potentially are. Correct. But no one the partner or the person looking for the partner is perfect. Well I was but that is another story😂 In all honesty I will admit to liking "Married at First Site". I know it is all clipped and edited for affect however it is something to watch. What I have noticed watching this is that people have such high expectations and demands. Some of them really are looking for something that does not exist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 41 minutes ago, Bob8 said: My general rule of thumb is that people who think they are gurus on relationships tend to have long suffering spouses. +1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si1 Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 27 minutes ago, Nick Cash said: I’ve had no major problems being a house husband. There are quite a few of us around now. In our circle of friends there are several house husbands. Many successful career women have to have a house husband to complement their career demands. I had enough spare time for small volunteering roles and the occasional temporary job, but my primary role was raising our children. Well done. Fair wind. But - can you lick your own eyebrows? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Cash Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 3 minutes ago, Si1 said: Well done. Fair wind. But - can you lick your own eyebrows? No. My main asset is my quick brain. Boredom is not an option. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markyh Posted July 22, 2023 Share Posted July 22, 2023 10 hours ago, anonguest said: Well, we've had the reports of 'sex for rent' so, given the insane costs of housing, I'm frankly surprised it's taken so long for 'marriage for housing' reports to appear. 😞 Was a big thing for my Wife that part of her attraction to me when we met was I owned a house, worth 2.5 x my mortgage, and a good company car, and after 6 months i let her move in rent free. Within 2 years we ere engaged, within 4 years had our 1st kid. Then I decided to marry her, we worked together as a team to move up the ladder, had a 2nd kid, and now she has 50% equity in our final home worth over £650k and mortgage free. She invested wisely. So did, she earns more than me now i and take it easy running my own business being as busy as i want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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