Bloo Loo Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 10 seconds? that is a long long time...this is probably amounting to a serious sexual assault...twice... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepwello'nights Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Depends, if he's bigger or stronger than you go to the police, if he's not then take Mr. Miyagi's advice. Always be pragmatic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ccc Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Agreed. A smack in the puss is the only option. If he complains ? You make it clear you will raise the sexual assault claim. He will shut up. 100% guaranteed. He is clearly a bully - only option is to deal with him in a way he will notice. Not that I am usually a fan of violence - but in this situation - its the only way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oracle Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Four options 1. Smash him 2. Smash him 3. Smash him Sorry I forgot the fourth, smash him. grab by balls and twist robustly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olde guto Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Call the police NOW. If they don't go around immediately try and secure evidence as well, the CCTV "tapes" might get "accidentally deleted" otherwise. If the police don't anything then think about calling a solicitor as well, try and get the manager sacked (or asked to resign) if they aren't prepared to do that then go for the £££. Don't go for physical assault, this type of ******* will be straight on the phone to the police or will try and get you sacked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Hovis Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Call 101, you'll get through to a civilian call handler who'll take details and let you know what your options are. If after the call you decide that you don't want to take it any further then that's fine anf they won't come back to you. So don't think of it as a huge drama that you need to psych yourself up for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
interestrateripoff Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Yes call the police. The CCTV footage will need securing if the cameras have caught it. Is this happening to any other staff? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ccc Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Check the CCTV footage. Take a copy. Then next time he tries it again - smash him. Then show him the footage. You are in charge - 100%. Use that to your advantage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porca misèria Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 lasting maybe 10 seconds or more. If that's not a case of time dilation, you have ample time there to let off a juicy one. Consider brewing up an artichoke soup for the most pungent smell I can think of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Hovis Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 There's still the under-current that this somehow funny or that LTS should man-up and lamp him one. If it was down the pub socially then lamping him one is of course an option (happened to me, first time I warned, second time I flew at him and it was only two mates jumping on me that stopped something quite serious happening, they could see I'd lost it) but not at work. I'd see it as my duty to get this guy sacked, if he's doing it to a grown man he'll be doing it to 18 yo bar staff too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wahoo Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Don't touch him. It will complicate your case. Take the CTV evidence then report. Give tape to Police. Get a solicitor. Just do it. Don't be wet. (No offence meant ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Battenberg Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Call 101, you'll get through to a civilian call handler who'll take details and let you know what your options are. If after the call you decide that you don't want to take it any further then that's fine anf they won't come back to you. So don't think of it as a huge drama that you need to psych yourself up for. 101 is a good idea. I used that when I'd had a man selling knives and kindly demonstrating how sharp the largest meat one was over the counter of my shop. Back on topic, what has happened here highlights one of the big issues with sexual assault. It doesn't matter who it happens to, man, woman or child, the feelings are those of confusion and bafflement. It's easy to suggest lamping him and there are some that would do that but most of the time the shock and amazement almost paralyse the victim. My youngest recently had a situation where a boy his own age ( fostered with a troublesome past) touched his bum ring whilst they were playing rugby. My son went nuts with him and the boy tried to cover it up suggesting that was a normal rugby tackle. My boy went down to the carer and told straight away. Apparently this was not the first time this kid had done this sort of thing. Not all kids or adults would be so confident to say something. After all this is what sexual predators rely on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porca misèria Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 There's still the under-current that this somehow funny or that LTS should man-up and lamp him one. It wouldn't be an HPC thread without levity! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Hovis Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 It wouldn't be an HPC thread without levity! It's still double standards, if it was a 16 yo girl crying herself to sleep after it nobody would be taking the piss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fully Detached Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 As others have said, you're dealing with a bully who will do this to other, more vulnerable people in future - if he is not already doing so. On that basis I think you almost have a responsibility to go to the rozzers. If you tw@t him one, all you've done is get him off your back and possibly opened up hassle for yourself. If you're worried about the reaction of people you know, they should soon settle down when they realise you reported it to stop other, younger staff from facing the same, and that violence would have impacted your ability to do that. And frankly, anyone who ignores that and starts intimating that you're a pussy is probably all mouth and no trousers anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porca misèria Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 It's still double standards, if it was a 16 yo girl crying herself to sleep after it nobody would be taking the piss. Possibly, but then she wouldn't've posted here. We "know" LTS, and we've had some serious responses in this thread. You might also want to think this through. If it was a newspaper report of a story where "boss touched my bottom inappropriately" had led to police action and serious consequences, HPC consensus would tend to the view that the response had been OTT, and would pose questions like did [victim] even ask [perpetrator] to stop before escalating? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StainlessSteelCat Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Possibly, but then she wouldn't've posted here. We "know" LTS, and we've had some serious responses in this thread. You might also want to think this through. If it was a newspaper report of a story where "boss touched my bottom inappropriately" had led to police action and serious consequences, HPC consensus would tend to the view that the response had been OTT, and would pose questions like did [victim] even ask [perpetrator] to stop before escalating? I suspect even the HPC massive would find a report of getting your face licked by your manager beyond the pale, and not simply a bit of larking around. You don't simply ask someone to stop with the unwanted attention under such circumstances at work - it should never have arisen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olde guto Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 It's still double standards, if it was a 16 yo girl crying herself to sleep after it nobody would be taking the piss. We are our own worst enemy, when it comes to stuff like this. From taking the pi$$ to offering really bad advice - I know of one bloke I used to work with was being abused by his (nasty council estate trash) wife, he got wound-up something chronic by the guys he worked with and eventually listened to their advice. Needless to say he lost everything. A woman would never get that sort advice from her workmates - it'd be either call the police or go to a shelter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porca misèria Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I suspect even the HPC massive would find a report of getting your face licked by your manager beyond the pale, and not simply a bit of larking around. I had my bottom gently slapped by a female manager once as I was bending over a table to plug something. However inappropriate it was (I was actually rather amused)- it was a league away from the previous assault I'd experienced. Whoops, I didn't even notice the licked face bit Does the boss in question have four legs and fur? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wherebee Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 As others have said to the OP, the correct course of action is: formal report to management with a formal request to retain the CCTV tapes (or they WILL be deleted) formal report to police for assault both in writing. anything else and either the perp or the company can wriggle out of it. and don't answer any questions from them such as 'what would you like to happen' or 'what do you want'. That way they can spin it as possible extortion. Just keep saying you are reporting sexual harassment and assault and you want them to handle it in line with company policy and UK law. edit: even if you might come to terms with the assault, you don't know who else he will attack in future. You have an obligation to future victims. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest_northshore_* Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 ...you're dealing with a bully who will do this to other, more vulnerable people in future - if he is not already doing so. On that basis I think you almost have a responsibility to go to the rozzers. If you tw@t him one, all you've done is get him off your back and possibly opened up hassle for yourself. If you're worried about the reaction of people you know, they should soon settle down when they realise you reported it to stop other, younger staff from facing the same, and that violence would have impacted your ability to do that... This. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPin Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I think Ms Battenberg is right. If some bloke started groping me at work, I would be too surprised to "lamp him". He might hear some "nautical language" though. I've worked with some very gay blokes, and they wouldn't behave like this. If a woman got a bit over fruity, I wouldn't be bothered so much, although it is still wrong at work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CyberNat Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Report him to the Police. 100%. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The XYY Man Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Like some other posters, I'm certain that in longtom's circumstances, I'd have seen the red-mist and simply nutted the dirty twät. But then I'm a bit of a dinosaur from a time when most problems at work were sorted out in the car-park..! Seriously though, this nasty little bully needs sorting out - and these days that means you have to report this bell-end to the bobbies. Unless of course you live anywhere near me, in which case I would be happy to pop down your pub one night this week and offer some "moral support"...! XYY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little fish Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I have had several instances of sexual harassment over the years. I have never reported anybody, either to senior management or to the police. Only once did I even tell my husband. That was a mistake as he took matters into his own hands and all hell let loose. I left that job. Another position I just left and said nothing to anybody. Now I wish I had handled things through proper processes. That grubby uncomfortable feeling doesn’t just go away longtom, it hangs about like a bad smell, inadvertently affecting you in all sorts of ways. Nobody has the right to make another person feel like that. You have done nothing wrong. Report him to both police and management. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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