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Guest eight

There's A Rat In Me Kitchen

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I like rats! They are smashing, and good for children, even girls!

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Guest eight

Call your landlord.

Do I detect the envy driven, bile filled rantings of a rent forever looser?

Look, I like totally own this mortgaged property and do not see how I should be expected to take advice from the likes of YOU, Mr so-called "StainlessSteelCat". In fact in future if you must address me at all could you take care to do so in a manner more reflecting the gulf between our relative statuses.

And one more thing....

... do you have a blunderbuss I can borrow?

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Don't get the sticky strips they'll just knaw their own feet off and hobble away.

Don't get the humane ones taking them to be released back into the wild quickly gets old.

Poison is best but they can decompose somewhere hidden and stink.

(When I say poison, I mean stuff toxic to rats not Brett Michaels and his weird bandana wig ponytail combo thing)

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Don't get the sticky strips they'll just knaw their own feet off and hobble away.

Don't get the humane ones taking them to be released back into the wild quickly gets old.

Poison is best but they can decompose somewhere hidden and stink.

(When I say poison, I mean stuff toxic to rats not Brett Michaels and his weird bandana wig ponytail combo thing)

If it's one rat then releasing it somewhere else isn't going to be too much of an issue. Then if there's more than one abandon that idea and got for good old-fashioned traps so you can remove them. If that's happening too often then go for poison but I'd leave it until the last resort because rotting rodent aroma isn't pleasant and stays for ages. Mind you you get used to it to a degree.

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Did all this when someone stored an old caravan inside my (warm,dry) industrial unit. The caravan came with, erm, sitting tenants.

I didn't fancy replacing all my vehicles' chewed wiring looms, so set to work.

Don't mess about. Old-fashioned 50p spring traps, cartoon style, primed with cheap chocolate. Loads of them left around all doors and floor edges. It just works; sorry ratfans.

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If its a big one then a cage trap may work better. Get some peanuts. Don't touch the trap with your bare hands as they can detect the human scent. Once you have it you could dispose of it by drowning although it is illegal to kill a captive wild animal.

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If its a big one then a cage trap may work better. Get some peanuts. Don't touch the trap with your bare hands as they can detect the human scent. Once you have it you could dispose of it by drowning although it is illegal to kill a captive wild animal.

Indeed it's not much fun coming down to find a large live rat with a snap trap round it's neck, unable to hide, my kids were once treated to the sight of my ex chasing one around with a mallet, thought it was the best morning entertainment ever.

We moved on to the electric ones that worked quite well, but they kept coming, so poison and rotting rodent stink it was..

To be serious before even chasing the buggers down, find out how they are getting in or your wasting your time. They have a liking for water courses, outflow pipes etc.

Also we never had a problem until our cat died and we got a Labrador that was more scared of the rats than vice versa

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Guest eight

Also we never had a problem until our cat died and we got a Labrador that was more scared of the rats than vice versa

Interesting. We've already got a Jack Russell which has the run of the main part of the house but not, funnily enough, the kitchen. Anything even remotely edible is now in lidded plastic storage containers so I can't see much incentive for the little **** to hang around (the rat that is, not the dog).

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One of my cats was eating a rat when I came home from the pub the other day. Thoruoghly enjoying it she was.

A friend of mine shoots the rats in his garden with a Weihrauch HW45 air pistol. You need to be a very good shot for that.

I used an air rifle last time we had rats. The cat we had then was very old and no longer up to ratting.

Nasty things rats. Their bladder has no sphincter and they leave a trail of urine wherever they go. They carry some nasty diseases.

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One of my cats was eating a rat when I came home from the pub the other day. Thoruoghly enjoying it she was.

A friend of mine shoots the rats in his garden with a Weihrauch HW45 air pistol. You need to be a very good shot for that.

I used an air rifle last time we had rats. The cat we had then was very old and no longer up to ratting.

Nasty things rats. Their bladder has no sphincter and they leave a trail of urine wherever they go. They carry some nasty diseases.

Wonder how it would have got on with the 15" monster from Sweden. It has been long known that rats are getting bigger and cats (if not smaller) a bit weaker.

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One of my cats was eating a rat when I came home from the pub the other day. Thoruoghly enjoying it she was.

A friend of mine shoots the rats in his garden with a Weihrauch HW45 air pistol. You need to be a very good shot for that.

I used an air rifle last time we had rats. The cat we had then was very old and no longer up to ratting.

Nasty things rats. Their bladder has no sphincter and they leave a trail of urine wherever they go. They carry some nasty diseases.

My cat loved to bring me all sorts of offerings into the kitchen via the cap flap.....thought himself rather clever, so got used to vermin presentations..

When younger went on hols and left two pet mice with a neighbour to look after, got back to be presented with twelve mice...I prefer pet rats to the mice though, rats are far more intelligent and surprisingly clean, they can suss the cats out. ;)

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Interesting. We've already got a Jack Russell which has the run of the main part of the house but not, funnily enough, the kitchen. Anything even remotely edible is now in lidded plastic storage containers so I can't see much incentive for the little **** to hang around (the rat that is, not the dog).

If the Terrier isn't man enough to sort out the rat I'd suggest rat sized break back traps filled with peanut butter.

If you are filling holes they will knaw straight back through cement or expanding foam. Pack the hole with wire wool - that'll show the bstard whose boss .

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