Gordon The Great, Live Speech At 2.15 Today.

[thecrashingisles]

Miliband says we're less likely to be a victim of crime because the state has legalised theft.

Gordon Brown would be less likely to be a victim of crime if the state legalised murder.

[200p]

Gordon Brown lists Labour's acheievements

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8279701.stm

COUGH, deliberate mistake?

[billybong]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8279701.stm

'Lawless minority'

Many found in Parliament defrauding taxpayers with fraudulent expenses claims.

Edited September 29, 2009 by billybong

[Orsino]

Gordon Brown lists Labour's acheievements

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8279701.stm

COUGH, deliberate mistake?

I like the way he claims 'Cancelling Debt' is one of Labour's achievements. I assume he's referring to a rag-tag bunch of corrupt Third World countries he does not represent rather than the British taxpayer he was elected to serve.

[200p]

Gordon Brown lists Labour's acheievements

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8279701.stm

COUGH, deliberate mistake?

Laughs, the BBC must be reading this, the spelling "mistake" has been corrected. Guess no one was really following the story, as the error has been there for 2 hours.

Still says "Page last updated at 14:49 GMT, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 15:49 UK"

[200p]

Ironic that Brown has boasted about "record result in schools", but the main article in the BBC news has a spelling mistake that has been shown around the world for 2 hours. It takes a nut [i have 8 PHDs] on a cult forum to point it out.

[billybong]

We'll change world again - Brown

That's just arrogant. What if the world doesn't want to be changed.

[moonriver]

For any hpc'ers who want to rate our leader's speech, Sky are running this....

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Mindtracker/Rate-The-Leader

[Seydel]

Dandy Mandy received a standing ovation from the assembled drones yesterday and today it was Global Gordon's turn.

It's odds-on that that pair would have had the same treatment if they'd worn badges the size of dustbin lids with the words 'I am a Bilderberberger, you thick koonts are slaves to our bosses' judging by most of the dopey articles in attendance.

[Seydel]

Just wait till this delegate returns to the hall after enjoying some sunshine at Brighton and breaks wind during the speech

Blimey, a bucket load of strong grog wouldn't make that rotter the slightest bit more appealing.

Though, it must be said that she is bailout material.

Too big to fail.

[OLDFTB]

was that "sit down in sympathy" at the end

If he wants sympathy then he'll find it in a dictionary.

It's somewhere between sh*t and syphillis!

[OLDFTB]

From BBC website:

Last year Gordon's performance made me sign up to the Labour Party for the first time. Today, his policies, his delivery, his values, reaffirm that choice without any doubt

Craig C, Portsmouth, UK

Typo.Should have read:

Craig C, Infirmary for mentally impaired cretins,Portsmouth, UK

[OLDFTB]

can someone list in point form what he has said/what policies he has advocated?

1.Cool on the outside:

To combat global warming and climate change all buildings should be fitted with air conditioning units on the outside.

2.Wheelie Bins:

The idea of weight monitoring chips in wheelie bins should be scrapped, instead the wheels should be removed, this would mean that if people generated too much waist they could not put their non-wheelie bin out for collection. It would also help prevent them being chucked into canals.

3.Needles

Due to the increasing number of children afraid of needles, I propose the destruction of the tedious, scary and often painful process of school vaccinations.

Instead, I propose that highly trained nurses should be given free reign on the playground with specially modified tranquillizer rifles which apply vaccinations as well as a tranquillizer. This would have two main benefits: It would be less scary for the children as they will not know what hit them, also it will be more fun for the nurses

4.Hypocrites

It is proposed that all politicians be made to swear a "hippocratic oath", preventing them by law from being Hypocrites. All politicians should be made to stand by their policies, or or at least admit that they were wrong.

5.

GCSE Lottery

It is proposed that, before the beginning of exams, the exam board will select a certain obscure phrase which will be kept secret. If any pupil inadvertently writes this phrase in any exam,he/she will automaticaly receive straight A* grades, and a free teddy.

6.One Sided Policy

It is proposed that The European Union end its discrimination by creating a "Court of Human Lefts" because their present policy is one_sided.

7.Prison Food

The problems of prison overcrowding and increased crime will be solved easily by issuing a compulsory contract on McDonalds to do all prison catering. Convervative estimates suggest a 50% reduction in crime rates within 2 years with 0% re-offender figures.

8.Political Colours

All politicians should paint them self's permantly head to toe in the colour of the party they represent - e.g. all Labour candidates in Red , all Conservatives in Blue ,etc,etc

9.One hours silence.

At 12 0' clock pm every day we will have a one hour silence dedicated to our time that has been lost due to work, home and labour

10.Good Heroes

Make it illegal for super heroes to use their powers for evil.

11.Safe Tractors

Ban tractors from driving on roads, they can drive across their fields.

12.

13.Scary Terrorists

Ban all terrorists from having beards as they look scary.

14.

15.Poop Scoop

Anyone allowing their Hyena to poop on the pavement should shovel it away immediately, As this is no laughing matter

16.Put a Sock in it

All socks to be sold in packs of 3 as a precaution against losing one.

[Guest sillybear2]

Phew, job done, onwards and upwards, time to start on that resignation speech.

[olliegog]

my BP would not stand watching 'the fightback' speech [were they in opposition then or just fighting back on the polls]. No doubt I will be wound up when snippets are aired at every possible breaking news repeat on the hour and half hour. Heaven help us if anyone votes for this man or worse, Nulabour get re-elected.

[nowthenagain]

Good speech I thought. Lots of substance.

[Guest P-Diddly]

Good speech I thought. Lots of substance abuse.

Correctified!

[Guest sillybear2]

2.55 (Jim here) Brown claims that Britain is leading the charge on having a “green†economy. “We are already global leaders in wind power, green cars, clean coal and carbon captureâ€, he claims.

Tell that to the 600 former Vestas workers.

[Reck B]

Good speech I thought. Lots of substance.

I agree with this statement providing the substance in question is horse-shít.

[Saving For a Space Ship]

You've obviously read the white paper, every middle-class family will be rewarded with a NuLabour Slag to look after? I guess if you can't bring the bottom up you bring the top down.

Teenage mother chav spawn will be re-distributed to the faithful labour (less?) middleclass who have been sterilised by the constant worry about their enormous debts & neg. equity.

This will include those suffering a 'mew-carriage'

[Realistbear]

BBC are certainly very sarcastic lately:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8279701.stm

We'll change world again - Brown

Gordon Brown lists Labour's achievements

Gordon Brown has urged Labour to "change the world again" in what was billed as his make-or-break speech to the party's annual conference..../

His speech came on the day an Ipsos Mori survey suggests the Conservatives are on 36%, Labour on 24% and the Liberal Democrats on 25% - the first time since 1982 that this polling firm has recorded Labour in third place.

If he had spent his speech apologising for the mess he created New Labour might not be in third place. Its the denial that get's people's goat.

He saved the world and now he wants to change the world.

Delusional.

Edited September 29, 2009 by Realistbear

[Guest sillybear2]

Teenage mother chav spawn will be re-distributed to the faithful labour (less?) middleclass who have been sterilised by the constant worry about their enormous debts & neg. equity.

Wasn't that the plotline behind the The Omen? At least that explains where those Damian style neo-satanists called the 'Miliband Brothers' came from.

[Saving For a Space Ship]

Wasn't that the plotline behind the The Omen? At least that explains where those Damian style neo-satanists called the 'Miliband Brothers' came from.

A far more frightening epic, still in production with a working title of 'The Home Own'

[Guest sillybear2]

He saved the world and now he wants to change the world.

Delusional.

The national debt was £347b and falling when NuLabour took office, that amount was the total accumulated from 1691 to 1997, it will be £1.4 trillion by the time NuLabour leave office. The public sector was also in surplus when they took office, the government is now running a deficit of 14% of GDP and plans to continue along those lines for many years to come, these sort of figures would make a banana republic blush. The Maastricht Treaty binds countries not to run deficits in excess of 3%.

He certainly changed the world for the next generation, they will be carrying this toxic legacy for decades to come, I wonder how much changing the world again is going to cost us?

Edited September 29, 2009 by sillybear2

[Guest sillybear2]

A far more frightening epic, still in production with a working title of 'The Home Own'

Is that where all the characters eventually become Repossessed?