'Dog kennel' flats

[Bland Unsight]

This made me laugh

Quote

Once kitted out with basic furniture, such as a small kitchenette, bed and wardrobe, the smallest flats will have very little room to move around. There appears to be little space, for example, for a sofa or a washing machine, unless it is stacked on top of the fridge.

Balancing a sofa on top of a fridge is bound to end in tears.

Rest of the article here.

[Futuroid]

Ideal for anyone who is a prison fetishist I would have thought.

Brought to you in partnership with your Tory overlords - helping landowners to your wealth since 1834.

[19 year mortgage 8itch]

But the question you have to ask yourself is, 'should you keep a Sausage in a dog kennel flat?'

[Motor_Blade]

16 square meters???? Seriously WTF? 

[Futuroid]

3 minutes ago, Motor_Blade said:

16 square meters???? Seriously WTF? 

They used a computer to calculate how much cubic space you need to hang yourself and then knocked a meter off.

[Patient London FTB]

Reckon the developer is going to take a massive hit on that one unless they can do a Fergus. Apparently Qatar are investing £5bn in post-Brexit UK so might be worth touching them for the cash. 

[zugzwang]

The bitter fruit of Barwell's micro-housing ambitions.

HPI+++ mad gainz forever... it's the Tory way.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/mar/27/dog-kennel-flats-barnet-house-smaller-than-travelodge-room

Quote

Hundreds of tiny studio flats, many smaller than a budget hotel room, are to be squeezed into an eleven-story block in north London as its developer takes advantage of the government’s relaxation of planning regulations.

Plans for Barnet House, used by the London borough of Barnet’s housing department, reveal that 96% of the 254 proposed flats will be smaller than the national minimum space standards of 37 sq metres (44 sq yards) for a single person.

The tiniest homes will be 16 sq metres – 40% smaller than the average Travelodge room. They are legal because of government deregulation designed to promote the conversion of underused office space to help meet housebuilding targets.

Local residents have labelled the Barnet scheme “ridiculous” and “immoral”, comparing the planned homes to dog kennels.

Once kitted out with basic furniture, such as a small kitchenette, bed and wardrobe, the smallest flats will have very little room to move around. There appears to be little space, for example, for a sofa or a washing machine, unless it is stacked on top of the fridge.

Office buildings in Croydon have also been converted into studios with floor areas of as little as 15 sq metres under the Tory deregulation. Housing experts have attacked the relaxation of planning regulations as a “race to the bottom”, but ministers insist the measure is helping to deliver vital new housing, and point out that more than 10,000 new homes were created from office buildings last year.

Under the “permitted development” system, developers who convert offices into homes do not have to meet minimum floor area standards, considered by researchers to be important for health, educational attainment and family relationships. Neither do they have to include any affordable housing.

Housing campaigners, including Shelter and the Royal Institute of British Architects, have warned the schemes are producing overcrowded “rabbit hutch” and “shoebox” homes that will seriously damage residents’ quality of life.

The schemes are prevalent in London and the south-east of England, where high housing prices incentivise owners to convert office buildings. Other examples of concern include theformer American Airlines office block near Heathrow, which has been turned into 288 flats, and Lewisham House in south-east London, for which an application was lodged for 230 residential units.

With converted offices accounting for almost 14,000 new dwellings last year – almost three-quarters of the growth in housing supply– the government appears unlikely to give up the strategy.

Tory-controlled Barnet council, which occupies part of Barnet House but does not own the building, is opposed to the development but said that because of national government policy it has no power to reject it on the grounds it is too cramped.

 

 

[Futuroid]

Pssst.

We're over here:

 

[zugzwang]

1001 1002 1003 Reasons To Punch A Tory.

[Maynardgravy]

one of the comments nailed it:

'Simple solution, just make MPs live in them instead of allowing second homes - they'll soon change the regulations to a more realistic level.'

[Bear Hug]

To make the flats feel more spacious, they should replace the walls between the flats and the communal areas with a welded steel mesh. 

Further improvements can be achieved by removing the walls between the living areas and the bathrooms (walls are such a waste of space).

For safety reasons, in case if any residents are somewhat suicidal with due to their cramped conditions, the windows should also be replaced with the above-mentioned welded steel mesh.

The furniture layout should also be optimised to make the most of the available accommodation.  For example, why have a double bed, when you can have a bunk bed and use half as much space?!

As the tenants will probably become quite angry and isolated in such accommodation, it is also best for them, and for the rest of us, if secure doors are installed to prevent the tenants from wandering outside and spoiling our wonderful capital.

You may worry about how all these people would make no contribution to society or GDP.  Fear not. Prostitution and drugs trade contribute to GDP. They could always sell drugs and their bodies to each other.

Edited March 27, 2017 by Bear Hug
Added more facts

[Bear Hug]

Surely, if the building is already there, there should be sufficient profit in converting it to normal size flats without the hassle and bad publicity of kennels? Unless developer entered the market really late and that's the only way they get their money back.

[Motor_Blade]

1 hour ago, Futuroid said:

They used a computer to calculate how much cubic space you need to hang yourself and then knocked a meter off.

As this is an old office building, the ceiling is probably high enough to allow hanging. The ceilings in most new builds on the other hand are so low Warwick Davis would probably struggle. 

[EssKay]

2 hours ago, Motor_Blade said:

16 square meters???? Seriously WTF? 

Pfft - 16 square metres is LUXURY.

 

Wake me up when it gets down to Hong Kong levels of density - 12 square *feet* "cage" homes:

 

 

[billybong]

.

Quote

 

Local residents have labelled the Barnet scheme “ridiculous” and “immoral”, comparing the planned homes to dog kennels.

 

The word "criminal" wouldn't be out of place either.

Edited March 27, 2017 by billybong

[billybong]

.

 

Housing Minister holding one of the new "apartments" in his hand.

Innovative.

Edited March 27, 2017 by billybong

[Tempus]

The way things are going, I suspect actual dog kennels will be proposed as the next generation of affordable housing by the Government.

Throw in help to buy plus a mortgage that will be paid back over 35 years and voila! Affordable housing for the young. 

[MattW]

Depressing!

I hope potential buyers boycott this development in protest. Seriously: £180k for one of those studios?? Jesus wept.

[Saving For a Space Ship]

I'm happy to live in a small space, if its my land, or reasonably priced, not being screwed by a land lord for top dollar.

The drone cubes are corporate borg hell holes docking stations, for stockholm syndrome worker drones 

[Tempus]

40 minutes ago, MattW said:

Depressing!

I hope potential buyers boycott this development in protest. Seriously: £180k for one of those studios?? Jesus wept.

Price isn't given. £180K is only a guide as to what similar local studios go for. I suspect being 'new' these will be considerably more. But a (new) box in London for (probably) under £250K? They will be queuing round the block to buy them. The only ones weeping will be the ones who miss out.

[BorrowToLeech]

I propose that future generations simply be canned, like human spam, and kept on racks in out of town warehouses.

This solves the storage problem, and allows baby boomers to feast upon them directly without the trouble of drawing up a rental agreement. 

[Bear Hug]

2 minutes ago, DrBuyToLeech said:

I propose that future generations simply be canned, like human spam, and kept on racks in out of town warehouses.

This solves the storage problem, and allows baby boomers to feast upon them directly without the trouble of drawing up a rental agreement. 

There should be some nice countryside villas available soon, now that they are deemed to be too small for the cows:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4354586/Shocking-pictures-calves-battery-farm-Dorset.html

[Tempus]

4 minutes ago, DrBuyToLeech said:

I propose that future generations simply be canned, like human spam, and kept on racks in out of town warehouses.

This solves the storage problem, and allows baby boomers to feast upon them directly without the trouble of drawing up a rental agreement. 

But this will prove a problem for BTLers so you will need to ensure that BTLers are able to buy the cans and rent them out to the human spam. 

[19 year mortgage 8itch]

31 minutes ago, Bear Hug said:

There should be some nice countryside villas available soon, now that they are deemed to be too small for the cows:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4354586/Shocking-pictures-calves-battery-farm-Dorset.html

Is that not from Glasto? Milking the punters year after year.

[Bear Hug]

13 minutes ago, 24 year mortgage 8itch said:

Is that not from Glasto? Milking the punters year after year.

Not seen that part. Must be VIP yurts area.