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Sky Telly Want Me Darlings

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They want me to be part of a panel, I reckon it`s the first of many intros. my pr guru (snigger) has arranged. Anyhow, the script is "property ladder, how to help the FTB?" Now I`ve thought about it a lot over the weekend, but we`re moving along OK and I cannot recommend:

Co -buying,

Joint -ownership, (unless its about sharing a joint :blink: )

Key worker schemes,

Shared ownership, or any other ******** that doesn`t involve kicking a vendor squarely in in the nuts, beating the flippers to the punch, buying at auction having done your homework etc. Oh and getting the best mortgage rate possible B) and waiting for the inevitable increase in rates leading to a reversal of fortune for the trampled on FTB.

I just have this vision that I`ll kick off and they`ll cut to an Ocean Finance advert and attempt to drag me from the studio..Anyhow if you fancy it pm me, it`s Wednesday at 10 am. I`ll give you the contact details WARNING: only posters I like need apply can`t be you now Greg, can`t risk you mouthing off all clever about your new owners and their clever Trevor stragedee :D

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I just have this vision that I`ll kick off and they`ll cut to an Ocean Finance advert and attempt to drag me from the studio..Anyhow if you fancy it pm me, it`s Wednesday at 10 am. I`ll give you the contact details WARNING: only posters I like need apply can`t be you now Greg, can`t risk you mouthing off all clever about your new owners and their clever Trevor stragedee :D

Can't wait to get a gander at you. You are wrong btw, it will be cut to the new Halifax Cowboys advert.

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I reckon we need a respectable, well presented, level-headed individual to portray a professional approach to this issue. We can't have any old hpc mentalist on there.

My vote goes to RFD!

i would rather be shouting on the jeremy kyle show. pehaps smash a chair over a dna disagreement with a burberry bowed resident claimant...front up to her mam over paying me nash ect.

obviously with a 'i work for hpc' shirt on.

this is what happened when i was asked to appear on itv's loose women for a talk / demo about the work of hm customs search dogs.

corky went right for than nolan womans leafy gusset, where we found hidden a small wrap of methamphetamines...?? we cut to a purple loan ad asap....

Edited by right_freds_dead

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Can't wait to get a gander at you. You are wrong btw, it will be cut to the new Halifax Cowboys advert.

Seriously it`s not for me, just not my thing. I don`t do the self-promotion stuff, never have in any venture, I find it all a bit sad. Jason how`s about you doing it? Not calling you sad :D Just you`d be a more impartial spokesperson..I`ll give you a wedge if you use the word firstrung 10 times :lol::lol:

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They want me to be part of a panel, I reckon it`s the first of many intros. my pr guru (snigger) has arranged. Anyhow, the script is "property ladder, how to help the FTB?" Now I`ve thought about it a lot over the weekend, but we`re moving along OK and I cannot recommend:

Co -buying,

Joint -ownership, (unless its about sharing a joint :blink: )

Key worker schemes,

Shared ownership, or any other ******** that doesn`t involve kicking a vendor squarely in in the nuts, beating the flippers to the punch, buying at auction having done your homework etc. Oh and getting the best mortgage rate possible B) and waiting for the inevitable increase in rates leading to a reversal of fortune for the trampled on FTB.

I just have this vision that I`ll kick off and they`ll cut to an Ocean Finance advert and attempt to drag me from the studio..Anyhow if you fancy it pm me, it`s Wednesday at 10 am. I`ll give you the contact details WARNING: only posters I like need apply can`t be you now Greg, can`t risk you mouthing off all clever about your new owners and their clever Trevor stragedee :D

In otherwords you dont have the 'face' for TV. :lol::lol::lol::P

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Seriously it`s not for me, just not my thing. I don`t do the self-promotion stuff, never have in any venture, I find it all a bit sad. Jason how`s about you doing it? Not calling you sad :D Just you`d be a more impartial spokesperson..I`ll give you a wedge if you use the word firstrung 10 times :lol::lol:

What? You'll give him a wedgie??? :unsure:

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Well, Shaker could always talk out of his ****. Sure to go down a treat. Oh, he already does. Sorry. ;):P

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If we have any young ladies with great boobs that speak perfec' estuary English they should make themselves known now!

Well, I'd volunteer, but I don't have the knowledge I'm afraid. I'd be a good distraction though :D

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I've got the looks ;) but I'd probably end up kicking off with the inevitable rep from Foxtons who will be on the panel.

It would be funny to turn to the panel and ask:

"Can you please explain to me why the average age of a FTB is now 36?

Does this not ring any alarm bells for any of the panel, viewers or presenters?"

Edited by DonnieDarker

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  • 301 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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