The XYY Man

Fault finding? it's my raison d'etre !!! I am the second best fault finder in the North East. And the other bloke is a tosser !!! Fault finding..??? I can do that. Finding faults? I can do that...gissa job, go on, gissa...

Electronics. Test Engineer for the last 6 years, but previous experience of workshop-based repair and field service. Gissa job...

Thanks for that - a fairly accurate observation. Amazed I come across that way when I try so hard to hide it...!!! (Ex) XYY

Damn, I wanted that IPOD - any chance of swapping me this ASDA whisky for a bottle of Glenfiddich as a consolation prize...???

Maybe - if in the same sense that I "enjoy" the missus...

Thanks, but I reckon it's a blessing in disguise - I only work in Middlesbrough. By not going there everyday, I am exposed to much less smog - must be at least half the Middlesbrough levels in Hartlepool... And as for gold on the pavement, we've still got none up here either. Plenty of dog-shit though...

Today, a news report on the BBC that says the North East is suffering the most thanks to this recession. LINK to BBC News Report As someone who left school at 16 in 1981 just as Thatcher reached the height of her powers, I am pretty used to that - we North-Easterners took a canny kicking from that bitch. But that history is repeating itself up here under a Labour government - yes, a LABOUR government (hint of Kinnock there) - convinces me that whatever box we stick our cross in, we still get shafted. And I now know for certain that I will never vote again, until I get a "None of the Above" option. And I respectfully advise all of you, my hpc chums, to do exactly the same. And as an aside, an item that was NOT in the news today, is the fact that (as of the 27th of March) 21 jobs in Middlesbrough are no more. And one of them is mine. And I'm enjoying a nice bottle of ASDA Smart Price whisky (£7.83) to celebrate - I mean it hardly matters if I'm late in the morning... I was one of those who followed Tebbit's advice by getting on my bike and heading South in '84 - and it now looks like I'm coming back for a 25th anniversary tour...!!! And, just like the last time I was stealing your jobs, I will also be teaching you shandy-drinkers how to drink beer and shag women. Without spilling a drop... (Ex) XYY

Well property and insolvency are just two sides of the same coin - as one rises the other will fall in a "swings and roundabouts" fashion - and you don't mention "no win, no fee" compo claims at all. Seems a pretty average game of cards they played if you ask me... Which of course, you didn't

So it might be worth me putting in a cheeky offer on this 32-"bedroom" property then... X Y Y

Well I wouldn't touch the tw@t - unless it was with a blowtorch... XYY

I prefer to think that house prices were NEVER important, we were just brainwashed into believing they were. And now, more and more people are starting to realise that. And it's sites like HPC.co.uk that explained to thick fookers like me exactly how the smoke and mirrors worked. Once you understand how the conjouring trick works, it, er...doesn't anymore!!! And you can bet as much of whatever worthless paper currency you have left on the fact that this site will be among the first to explain the next trick these bankers think of. God bless HPC.co.uk, and all who wail in her... XYY PS - see what I did there??? - sail / wail

Nah. But beef-curtains - well that's a different matter... X Y Y

Yes, you and the last poster do have a point - I was on a Newcastle to Kings Cross train last year and, what I would have called the guard or the ticket collector, made the usual announcement over the tannoy as to the stations we'd be stopping at and when the buffet car opened. But his opening statement was "Good morning Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your passenger services manager speaking..." Yeah, seems like everyone's a manager these days... XYY - Urine Redeployment Manager

OHHHHH YEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!! - damn right it is...!!! X Y Y

Oh yes, they might stand out. You need to do something to the rest of the house so they aren't as obvious, like this enterprising fellow in my locale has been doing... THE BEER GARDEN And yes, he's done the front of the house too... X Y Y

Jaguar Land Rover cuts 450 staff - BBC And no bonuses either - what a refreshing change to see those responsible actually carry the can for a change. Let's hope Nissan prove to be as wise in their selection process... XYY

Sure is - no video I'm afraid, just the record - and it is truly awful. LINK to this abomination... Shame I couldn't find that clip of Pamela Stephenson sitting on his face - pure class... XYY

Only 'cos Reggie Bosenquet had nicked his copy and disappeared into the bogs with it... X Y Y

We do all kinds of things in Hartlepool, but we used to do so much more... We used to make steel, wheras now we are more likely to steal. We used to make ships, but now we are more famous for canoes. We even used to hang monkeys, where we now elect them as mayor... But it's not all bad news in the cultural capital of the North-East - there is a mighty fine silver-lining to those clouds. We used to have a bent MP called Peter Mandelson, but thankfully, now we have a bent MP who is NOT called Peter Mandelson. Things are really looking up round here... XYY

This idea sounds brilliant, I simply HAD be the first to try it out. So I've just emailed in "sick" for tomorrow morning... XYY

And I'll guess those deposits will often/always be cheques - ie more bank money. So we all go out to our public/private/"self-employed" positons each day and play our own little part in shuffling around something that doesn't actually exist, and then we pat ourselves on the back and convince ourselves that our little part of the whole con-trick is more valuable/important/worthy than others who - of course - should get less. It's a brilliantly simple strategy - keeping us all fighting each other guarantees that we all keep working for, and on behalf of, the banks. So which is the more worthy - "private" slave, or the "public" slave...??? I'd venture neither... XYY (Private slave)

Bet you still go to the bank for your wages though...

Obviously not Ulrika Jonsson and Nena (99 red balloons) in yer back bedroom then mate, or you wouldn't give a fook what that law was. Or any other for that matter... X Y Y

Same place as yours - the bank... XYY

Not quite typical I'd agree - he'll probably need a bath more than most of them... XYY