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SPEN555

Laughable 5 Point Plan By Ea

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Oh dear looks like clutching at straws here to maintain extortionate house price levels.

http://www.dacres.co.uk/dynamic.php?id=news230708

How about a simple 1 point plan and reduce asking prices. :rolleyes: There job done, market sorts itself out as it should do.

Alternatively,

1. Assist in the ways above setting a dangerous precedent.

2. Then have to provide assistance regarding fuel.

3. Oh then theres the Utilities to consider.

4. Then assitance for food blah blah :rolleyes:

Assistance for people who bought shares and they fell

Assistance for punters who lost in the 2.30 at Newmarket

Assistance for people who went with Betamax

Assistance for people where it rained on their wedding day

boo fúcking hoo.

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1. Stamp duty holiday

but they'll have to replace the tax lost with some other tax so little benefit

2. Re-introduce MIRAS

Yes. and pay for it by ending tax relief on second properties. (bye, bye BTL)

3. Curb unreasonable demands

So interest rates will have to be more to compensate so no benefit. In fact probably worse as monthly payments will be more.

4. Reform the safety net for borrowers

Great. May as well remorgage and by an aston martin.

5. Scrap Home Information Packs (HIPs)

Yes.

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Oh dear looks like clutching at straws here to maintain extortionate house price levels.

http://www.dacres.co.uk/dynamic.php?id=news230708

How about a simple 1 point plan and reduce asking prices. :rolleyes: There job done, market sorts itself out as it should do.

Alternatively,

1. Assist in the ways above setting a dangerous precedent.

2. Then have to provide assistance regarding fuel.

3. Oh then theres the Utilities to consider.

4. Then assitance for food blah blah :rolleyes:

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Guest DissipatedYouthIsValuable
Oh dear looks like clutching at straws here to maintain extortionate house price levels.

http://www.dacres.co.uk/dynamic.php?id=news230708

How about a simple 1 point plan and reduce asking prices. :rolleyes: There job done, market sorts itself out as it should do.

Alternatively,

1. Assist in the ways above setting a dangerous precedent.

2. Then have to provide assistance regarding fuel.

3. Oh then theres the Utilities to consider.

4. Then assitance for food blah blah :rolleyes:

These people are twats.

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I don't understand why some EAs are still trumpeting the get rid of stamp duty and arrangement fees rubbish. They know the only solution is to reduce the bloody price, so just tell the vendors to drop it or ****** off.

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Assistance for people who bought shares and they fell

Assistance for punters who lost in the 2.30 at Newmarket

Assistance for people who went with Betamax

Assistance for people where it rained on their wedding day

boo fúcking hoo.

Assistance for people who bought an Xbox 360 but now want a Wii

Assistance for people who can't be bothered to go to work

Assistance for people who drive to the shop that's only a 5 minute walk away

Assistance for people who have less cars than their neighbours

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1. Stamp duty holiday

but they'll have to replace the tax lost with some other tax so little benefit

2. Re-introduce MIRAS

Yes. and pay for it by ending tax relief on second properties. (bye, bye BTL)

3. Curb unreasonable demands

So interest rates will have to be more to compensate so no benefit. In fact probably worse as monthly payments will be more.

4. Reform the safety net for borrowers

Great. May as well remorgage and by an aston martin.

5. Scrap Home Information Packs (HIPs)

Yes.

The EAs mind believe the property market is unaffected by anything else in the world, and therefore money raised through property tax is merely used as toilet paper in Gordon Brown's office bog.

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I haven't done on yet but it will probably look like this:

Dear fukheads,

Was your five point plan to revive the property market written by someone with the intellectual might of a 7 year old, or just someone with no idea how economics, taxation, and market forces work? Since you are a firm of estate agents I will assume it is both of the above.

....

....

JohnnyB

That gave me a chuckle :)

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I don't understand why some EAs are still trumpeting the get rid of stamp duty and arrangement fees rubbish. They know the only solution is to reduce the bloody price, so just tell the vendors to drop it or ****** off.

:lol::lol::lol:

Thats the right attitude mate.

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I like the phrase "Property professionals"

I have just bought some chippings for my drive and have been shovelling them. My neighbour begged for a couple of buckets full, so I sold them to him.

I am now an "Aggregates professional"

Great aint it?

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Helpfully, they have an email link!!

Everyone go copy our suggestions thus far and email them to : ilkley@dacres.co.uk

It's your duty as an HPCer!

kitchener.gif

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Estate Agents 5 point plan (the real one):

1 Save my job

2 Save my job

3 Save my job

4 Save my job

5 Save my job

HPC 5 point plan for Estate Agents:

1 Job Centre

2 Job Centre

3 Job Centre

4 Job Centre

5 Job Centre

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Mmm please bring back MIRAS :) it levels the playing field and puts OOs on the same financial step as BTLers, much better than the current non MIRAS system which favours BTLers. Lots of people would pay no or little income tax yey....

No, no, no.

As a renter I don't see why a homeowner should get tax relief on their housing costs when I don't.

MIRAS was always totally unfair.

Thank God it's gone. It only helped to prop up prices.

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Heres my letter.

Dear Sir/Madam

It was with great merriment that I read your 5 point plan in order to make house prices reach levels beyond 10 times salary. Perhaps you could explain to me the merits of mortgages costing over half the median income per household within the UK?

I too have some idea's on what should be done to get spending started once again.

1) Free Aston Martin with every home.

2) All bets refunded if you lose.

3) If a firm goes bankrupt within which you have shares the government should refund your loss too.

As you can tell from this brief note, I find your suggestions laughable and at worst extremely frightening. Wholesale encouragement from Estate Agents led to the 100% mortgage at 10 times income, and it has done nothing to stabilise the economy, but everything to increase inflation. Whilst I appreciate that for you, the lowering of house prices represents a cut in income it does not allow you to dictate the UK economy. By encouraging sellers to increase prices owing to the mythical supply and demand arguement your industry has led an entire generation of post baby boomers to unprecedented levels of personal debt. I only hope that you are going to provide a fund for those first time buyers to which you sold property will be bailed out of their negative equity.

Regards

Symo

Who has sent their's ?

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why do all these help schemes all kepp going on about the £100,000 mortgage?

if i could get a house with a £100,000 mortgage i wouldnt need any assistance ot get on the ******* ladder you morons, HOUSE PRICES NEED TO DROP

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Heres my letter.

Who has sent their's ?

Mine was along the lines of

" read your 5 point plan, laughed like I hadn't laughed in ages, thanks for that.

Seems like absolute desperation, good luck with the job hunt"

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Heres my letter.

Who has sent their's ?

I haven't done on yet but it will probably look like this:

Dear fukheads,

Was your five point plan to revive the property market written by someone with the intellectual might of a 7 year old, or just someone with no idea how economics, taxation, and market forces work? Since you are a firm of estate agents I will assume it is both of the above.

You cannot simply get rid of a major earning tax (stamp duty) without making up for that shortfall elsewhere, or did you think the Government can just counjour wealth out of thin air? The Treasury is already losing billions because of a lack of property transactions, so they are unlikely to make any further reductions to this tax. In any case, the average UK property has seen almost £20,000 knocked off its price, which is quite a lot compared to the 1,600 stamp duty that might be paid. If one merely waits for the prices to fall below the stamp duty threshold, then there will be no need to remove this tax.

Equally, if lenders were forced to get rid of arrangement fees, then they would recoup this cash through higher interest rates, which will push up monthly payments. Not a great idea at a time when people are already struggling with high inflation is it?

One point I do agree on is getting rid of HIPs, as they are utterly useless. But I doubt the £400 cost of a HIP is going to put many people off a transaction worth tens of thousands of pounds, do you?

If you want to sell more properties (and I assume you do otherwise you'll be on the street) then why don't you tell your retard clients to cut their ******ing stupid asking prices? If they priced 15% below whatever else is on the market then they are far more likely to get a sale than they are asking for £300,000 for a shitty little two-bed terrace.

Kind Regards,

JohnnyB

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Mmm please bring back MIRAS :) it levels the playing field and puts OOs on the same financial step as BTLers, much better than the current non MIRAS system which favours BTLers. Lots of people would pay no or little income tax yey....

Yeah scrap HIPS (shame you cant as its part of euro legislation)

Edited by moosetea

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I haven't done on yet but it will probably look like this:

Dear fukheads,

Was your five point plan to revive the property market written by someone with the intellectual might of a 7 year old, or just someone with no idea how economics, taxation, and market forces work? Since you are a firm of estate agents I will assume it is both of the above.

You cannot simply get rid of a major earning tax (stamp duty) without making up for that shortfall elsewhere, or did you think the Government can just counjour wealth out of thin air? The Treasury is already losing billions because of a lack of property transactions, so they are unlikely to make any further reductions to this tax. In any case, the average UK property has seen almost £20,000 knocked off its price, which is quite a lot compared to the 1,600 stamp duty that might be paid. If one merely waits for the prices to fall below the stamp duty threshold, then there will be no need to remove this tax.

Equally, if lenders were forced to get rid of arrangement fees, then they would recoup this cash through higher interest rates, which will push up monthly payments. Not a great idea at a time when people are already struggling with high inflation is it?

One point I do agree on is getting rid of HIPs, as they are utterly useless. But I doubt the £400 cost of a HIP is going to put many people off a transaction worth tens of thousands of pounds, do you?

If you want to sell more properties (and I assume you do otherwise you'll be on the street) then why don't you tell your retard clients to cut their ******ing stupid asking prices? If they priced 15% below whatever else is on the market then they are far more likely to get a sale than they are asking for £300,000 for a shitty little two-bed terrace.

Kind Regards,

JohnnyB

Ha Ha great letter. A few years ago I was shown round a flat by this estate agent and the person who showed me round had the surname '****'. :lol: Damn, it blanked it out, it is C_o_c_k

Edited by SPEN555

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Surely that's the wrong way around? ;)

You're right, More Accurately it should be:

Assistance for my girlfriend to buy a Wii because I bought an Xbox 360 instead.

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Guest AuntJess
I like the phrase "Property professionals"

I have just bought some chippings for my drive and have been shovelling them. My neighbour begged for a couple of buckets full, so I sold them to him.

I am now an "Aggregates professional"

Great aint it?

No prizes for guessing what the EAs are shovelling. :rolleyes:

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  • 396 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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