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jazzbear

Musical Light Relief

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http://youtube.com/watch?v=Tn28aGYytxs

Wage rises in China

Try to cause worldwide inflation

Unless you're in Sweden

You can only dream of hawkish bank citations

And everyone has been investing in

C.D. Obligations

It's the edge of the world

And all of western civilization

The sun is rising in the East

But will settle in our location

Those silly yanks in investment banks

Sold C.D. Obligations

Pay S&P and Moodys very well

To give a triple-A rating

To the flaming turds that lie within

What is this war you're waging?

[Chorus:]

Borrowers didn't conform

It's a sub-prime storm

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

As the money swirled the garbage got sold round the world

It was financial innovation

But the guys on HPC UK

Were getting high on information

They knew their stuff, things were bound to get rough

With C.D. Obligations

Liquidity is what's needed here

But it's printed in a Washington basement

Bernanke can you hear the choppers

Dropping money across the nation

And more writedowns aren't far away

It's C.D. Obligations

Born and raised to be debt slaves

Control of population

Everybody's gone there

And I don't mean on vacation

[Chorus]

Borrowers didn't conform

It's a sub-prime storm

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Destruction leads to a very rough road

But it also breeds creation

And recessions are part of the economic cycle

They can be a good vibration

But tidal waves will hit the financial world

From C.D. Obligations

Pay your bonuses very well

To reward misbehaving

Sicker than the rest

There is no test

'Cause cash is what you're craving

[Chorus]

Borrowers didn't conform

It's a sub-prime storm

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

Dream of C.D. Obligations

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http://youtube.com/watch?v=EMzoBkaFxh4

You can't bust this (x3)

My, my, my, my prudence hits me so hard

Makes me say "Oh my Lord"

Thank you for blessing me

With the keys to No. 10 Downing Street

It feels good, to be Gordon Brown

A super dope homeboy from Glasgow town

And I'm known as such

And this is a boom, uh, you can't bust

I told you Tory boy (You can't bust this)

Yeah, that's how we're living and you know (You can't bust this)

Look in my eyes, man (You can't bust this)

Yo, let me spin the funky soundbites (You can't bust this)

Economic miracle, and cheap debt

You got it like that, now you know you're all set

So move, outta your seat

And get a BTL and catch this beat

While it's rolling, hold on

Pump a little bit and let 'em know it's going on

Like that, like that

Go to a seminar with Inside Track

And invest, in another rabbit hutch

Cos this is a boom, uh, you can't bust

Yo, I told you (You can't bust this)

Why you renting there, man? (You can't bust this)

Yo, sound the bell, BTL is in, sucka (You can't bust this)

Give me interest rates, at a minimum

That's what people want and that's what I'm giving 'em

Now, they know

When you vote New Labour house prices will grow

Being hyped, every night

By Krustie and Phil and Beany alike

Vote for me, to learn

What you have to do in the 00's to earn

Free money, Legit

Don't wanna work hard so you might as well quit

That's the word because you know...

You can't bust this (Repeat 2x)

Break it down! (Music breaks down) Stop, Gordo time!

Go with the flow, it is said

That if you can't get a loan then you probably are dead

So wave your hands in the air

Bust a few moves, you'll be a property millionaire

This is it, for a winner

Dance to BTL it's a big money-spinner

Move, slide your rump

And let's all do the housing market pump, pump, pump, pump

Yeah... (You can't bust this)

Look, man (You can't bust this)

You better get leveraged, boy, because you know (You can't bust this)

Ring the bell, BTL is in

Break it down! (Music breaks down) Stop, Gordo time!

You can't bust this (Repeat 3x)

Break it down! (Music breaks down) Stop, Gordo time!

Every time you see me

I'm always spouting tripe

I'm dope on the floor and I'm magic on the mic

Now why would I ever stop doing this?

With others making records that just don't hit

Non-doms from around the world, in London every day

Say "Gordo, go Gordo, Greedy Gordo, yo Gordo"

And the poor people can pay

You can't bust this (Repeat 7x)

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- Everybody be cool, this is a bail-out!

- Any of you **** pricks move, and I'll stealth tax every **** last one of you!

Me and Darling got the funds; we're out to bail a bank.

We got Sachs outside carrying a full pack.

Now everything's cool and everything's smooth. (Hey that's smooth)

I walked up to the Applecart, I gave him the wedge

He gave me the Crock with puckered up lips

and a wink that I found cute, and I said,

"baby, baby, baby"

(Is this some taxpayer funded love thing happening here baby or what.)

By that time Darling tapped me with the 9

he said it was time to blow, ya know. So out the door we go.

Back to the ride with Sachs inside and alive; off we drive

I capped the police payrise, so you know we'll

never get far, riding around in a stolen

police car, so we dropped it off and

piled in a Caddy; Sachs was driving

because I had to talk to the taxpayers about something.

- Look, I don't know anything about any **** set-up, you can torture me all you want.

- Torture you, that's good, that's a good idea, I like that one.

Running around saving banks

all wacked off of Scooby Snacks! (2x)

I don't give a **** about the hell's

gate, 10 years growth and the economy's still

standing up straight.

So, we pull these jobs to make a little money;

no one gets hurt if they don't act funny.

On the way to the yacht, we almost got caught,

Darling's shooting mailboxes, not knowing

where the cop is.

They're at the Dunkin Donuts, adjacent from

Peter Hain's, whose mailbox Darling had just

exploded. They gave chase, but my man

Sachs is an ace; we lost those brothers

with haste. We cast off and along we went

off Bermuda to an island resort we rented.

- Sonny, I need you cool, are you cool?

- I am cool.

Running around saving banks

all wacked off of Scooby Snacks! (4x)

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NEWS:

Gordon Brown, the British Prime Minister, disappeared

early this morning.

Last seen in a dark grey business suit,

suitably camouflaged,

they saw him catch a train.

MAN IN THE STREET:

"Economic incompetence its disgusting"

"Such a horrible thing to do"

Gordon the muppet screwed the UK public and he served them all for tea

"He can't go far", "He can't go far".

"Hasn't got a leg to stand on"

"He can't go far".

MAN ON THE SPOT:

I'm standing next to a lion in Trafalgar Square

tension is mounting

There's a restless crowd of angry people

MAN ON THE COUNCIL:

"More than we're ever seen - had to tighten up security"

Over to the scene at Westminster

Vince Cable's ready to speak

VINCE CABLE:

"Man of suspicion, you can't last long, the British Public

is on our side"

BRITISH PUBLIC:

"You can't last long", "You can't last long".

"Said you couldn't trust him, his predecessor was just the same"

"You can't last long".

GORDON:

If I was many miles from here,

I'd be sailing in an open boat on the sea

Instead I'm on this window ledge,

With the whole world below

Up at the window

Look at the window

ED BALLS:

"We can help you"

NULABOUR'S CHORUS:

"We can help you"

RUTH KELLY:

"We're all your friends if you come on down and talk

to us Gordon"

GORDON:

You must be joking

Take a running jump

The crowd was getting stronger and our Gordon

getting weaker;

Forwards, backwards, swaying side to side

Fearing the very worst

They called Yvette Cooper to the site

Upon the ledge beside him

Yvette Cooper made a last request.

YVETTE COOPER:

"Come off the ledge if Tony were here he'd be very,

very, very upset".

"Just can't jump, just can't jump"

"Your shirts all dirty and Nick Robinson's here from

the B.B.C."

"Just can't jump"

JACQUI SMITH: "We can help you"

NULABOUR'S CHORUS: "We can help you"

HARRIET HARMAN: "We're all your friends if you come on down and talk

to us Gordon"

GORDON: You must be joking

Take a running jump.

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The dollar went down and Ben Bernanke said

“Who’s in charge, now?” I don’t know, I feel sick.

More bad news every day weighing heavy on my back

Things are looking kind of gray, like they’re going to black

Don’t turn on the TV, don’t show me the paper

I've had enough of the whole sub-prime caper

I want to go on vacation ‘till the pressure lets up

But I've got to keep drinking from this poisoned cup

It’s been a hard day on the planet

How much is it all worth?

It’s getting harder to understand it

Things are tough all over on earth.

I can't seem to stop it no matter how hard I try

When it rains it pours out of a poisonous sky

The big bank writedowns just keep getting higher

It’s evil out there, man things are looking very dire

Central Banks have a system, but they can’t seem to win

The tightrope they're walking is alarmingly thin

I got to get on that plane to get me out of this place

But there’s gonna be warfare up there in Iran air space

It’s been a hard day on the planet

How much is it all worth?

It’s getting harder to understand it

Things are tough all over on earth

I’ve got clothes on my back and shoes on my feet

A roof over my head and something to eat

My gold stash is healthy, should inflation arrive

You know, it’s amazing but sometimes I think I’ll survive

I'm diversely invested so I'm not too exposed

I’m pretty well off I guess, I suppose

I might weather the storm of these worrying times

Economic turbulence - Gordo Brown wasn't lying

It’s been a hard day on the planet

How much is it all worth?

It’s getting harder to understand it

Things are tough all over on earth.

It’s business as usual; some things never change

It’s unfair, it's unkind, it's unjust and it’s strange

We don’t seem to learn; we can’t seem to stop

Maybe a house price crash would close up the shop

You know, maybe that would be fine: we would be off the hook

We resolved all our problems, never mind what it took

And it all would be over, finito, the end

Until the survivors started up all over again

It’s been a hard day on the planet

How much is it all worth?

It’s getting harder to understand it

Things are tough all over on earth.

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Well, you can't turn him

Into an honest man

Cos he's been turned into a whore

And the boys upstairs

Just don't understand anymore

The top brass don't like him

Talking so much

Unless he says

What they tell him to say

And they don't want to change

What don't need to change

There goes the last EA

The market's in disarray

The buyers have gone away

Hey, hey, hey

There goes your freedom of mortgage choice

There goes the last VI voice

There goes the last EA

Some folks say they're gonna

Hang him so high

'Cause you just can't do what he did

There's some things you just can't

Put in the minds of those kids

As we celebrate the house price jamboree

All the boys upstairs want to see

How much you'll pay for

What you used to get for free

There goes the last EA

The market's in disarray

The buyers have gone away

Hey, hey, hey

There goes your freedom of mortgage choice

There goes the last VI voice

There goes the last EA

Well, he's putting his money

On a house price plateau

And hopes the spring bounce is gonna kick in

But the market'll bust a move and

He'll have to take a crash on the chin

There goes the last EA

The market's in disarray

The buyers have gone away

Hey, hey, hey

There goes your freedom of mortgage choice

There goes the last VI voice

There goes the last EA

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Sung by Mervyn King:

Inflation's on the way up today

But CPI hasn't got much to say

We're getting more rate cuts from the Fed

Explains the pain thats in my head

Sometimes I don't know which way to go

Sometimes I can't tell, but it's just as well

'Cos I'm walking on a high wire

High wire

Bernanke's panic has set in

Recovery chances are looking slim

No need to cut the rates so fast

Economy's very fragile not going to last

Sometimes I don't know which way to go

Sometimes I can't tell

But it's just as well

'Cos I'm walking on a high wire

Cutting through the ring of fire

High wire

Have to pull it together

We're in for some stormy weather

Have to pull it together

We're in for some nasty weather

High wire, high wire

It really isn't too much fun

Sitting round waiting for the crash to come

Gordo says we're fundamentally cool

I may be an idiot but indeed I am no fool

Sometimes I don't know which way to go

Sometimes I can't tell but it's just as well

'Cos I'm walking on a high wire

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  • 293 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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