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Homes Under The Hammer


Antsy
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Today I have been languishing on the sofa with sickness and watched this... possibly the biggest collection of idiots I have ever seen. The highlights: 1. Man in Gorranhaven, Cornwall, buys titchy plot with planning permission for 2 bed overlooking sea (from a distance) for 130K :blink: . Ignores fact it has a sewer under it so he can't build on it unless sewer is re-routed. Horrified to find this will cost 13k not the 3k he had hoped and means waiting for south west water to organise the works. Has been waiting since last summer for this while market goes cold. Cue pics of him now looking disappointed (read: desperate) and saying he'll hopefully make a small profit at least, depite the 'cooling' market.

2. Asian bloke buys 12th floor flat in Edmonton Green for 71k (despite guide price of 55k) in conjunction with his dad ('who has 20 years experience of property buying'). Building is heavily fortified from local attacks ('a high standard of security', chirps the presenter, pointing out numerous entry videophones, guards etc). *Horror* 'Experienced' dad then finds he can't get a mortgage for a flat over the 4th floor :blink::blink: (where has he been living? the moon? Surely most people know this, especially before parting with stacks of cash?) Luckily they manage to lean on their extended family for the balance. Son then promises it will be up for rent 2 weeks later but fannies about for 2 months putting in a coat of paint and a kitchen. says being a landlord is too much of a hassle (despite the fact he still hasn't got round to finding a tenant), 'except the bit where you see the money come into the bank'.

3. Blonde from the Wirral, buys 1 bed terrace without seeing it for 35k. Is a dump inside. Bats eyelashes at builder who converts it to a 2 bed (one shoebox with shower en-suite - and that's the only bathroom in the whole house) for 2k. Two estate agents come round. Cheery fat one says she could get 40k max, but bathroom looks a bit wrong so she needs planning permission for an extension to build a downstairs bathroom in. Camp EA with mullet looks like he's swallowed sick when he exists the house. BBC doesn't say what he thought it was worth.

Roll on the revolution. Who says the BBC can't do comedy anymore?

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3 good reality bites.

excellent :lol::lol::lol:

which reminds me. the 96k terrace i was mulling over, then reduced to 92k. no way worth more than 55k for area.

has been withdrawn from market.

oh dear. no one to rip off left then.? seems the owners will have to stay in it along with all the debt. i didnt think anyone would want to take on the 55k +45k of additonal inflation to cover their bad lending habits. so thats them. MEWd up and stuck in a tiny terrace for 25 yrs.

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3 good reality bites.

excellent  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

which reminds me. the 96k terrace i was mulling over, then reduced to 92k. no way worth more than 55k for area.

has been withdrawn from market.

oh dear. no one to rip off left then.? seems the owners will have to stay in it along with all the debt. i didnt think anyone would want to take on the 55k +45k of additonal inflation to cover their bad lending habits. so thats them. MEWd up and stuck in a tiny terrace for 25 yrs.

Maybe it will be shortly re-marketed by their lender after the repo goes through?

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Maybe it will be shortly re-marketed by their lender after the repo goes through?

i dunno. i think they would end up just being stuck there.

it looked like, when i viewed. that they had got onto the idea (from tv probably) and upgraded everything. kitchen, flooring, decorating. they had it like a show house inside. it was all cheesy 'dressed' coffee smell etc. old skool.

but for some reason they thought someone was going to pay 3 times what they did and they would move onto a semi or something for next to nothing. they probably bought for no more than 34k (thats the 2002 price). the 60k profit and a re mortgage of 70k would have taken them to a newer semi in this area. at my expense of course.

just another dozy couple trying to make a quick buck out of a 'professional couple from the city' that dont exist in leyland, nr preston. NW.

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Today I have been languishing on the sofa with sickness and watched this... possibly the biggest collection of idiots I have ever seen. The highlights: 1. Man in Gorranhaven, Cornwall, buys titchy plot with planning permission for 2 bed overlooking sea (from a distance) for 130K :blink: . Ignores fact it has a sewer under it so he can't build on it unless sewer is re-routed. Horrified to find this will cost 13k not the 3k he had hoped and means waiting for south west water to organise the works. Has been waiting since last summer for this while market goes cold. Cue pics of him now looking disappointed (read: desperate) and saying he'll hopefully make a small profit at least, depite the 'cooling' market.

2. Asian bloke buys 12th floor flat in Edmonton Green for 71k (despite guide price of 55k) in conjunction with his dad ('who has 20 years experience of property buying'). Building is heavily fortified from local attacks ('a high standard of security', chirps the presenter, pointing out numerous entry videophones, guards etc). *Horror* 'Experienced' dad then finds he can't get a mortgage for a flat over the 4th floor  :blink:  :blink:  (where has he been living? the moon? Surely most people know this, especially before parting with stacks of cash?) Luckily they manage to lean on their extended family for the balance. Son then promises it will be up for rent 2 weeks later but fannies about for 2 months putting in a coat of paint and a kitchen. says being a landlord is too much of a hassle (despite the fact he still hasn't got round to finding a tenant), 'except the bit where you see the money come into the bank'.

3. Blonde from the Wirral, buys 1 bed terrace without seeing it for 35k. Is a dump inside. Bats eyelashes at builder who converts it to a 2 bed (one shoebox with shower en-suite - and that's the only bathroom in the whole house) for 2k. Two estate agents come round. Cheery fat one says she could get 40k max, but bathroom looks a bit wrong so she needs planning permission for an extension to build a downstairs bathroom in. Camp EA with mullet looks like he's swallowed sick when he exists the house. BBC doesn't say what he thought it was worth.

Roll on the revolution. Who says the BBC can't do comedy anymore?

Excellent post. Superb summary. Congrats!

VP

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Today I have been languishing on the sofa with sickness and watched this... possibly the biggest collection of idiots I have ever seen. The highlights: 1. Man in Gorranhaven, Cornwall, buys titchy plot with planning permission for 2 bed overlooking sea (from a distance) for 130K :blink: . Ignores fact it has a sewer under it so he can't build on it unless sewer is re-routed. Horrified to find this will cost 13k not the 3k he had hoped and means waiting for south west water to organise the works. Has been waiting since last summer for this while market goes cold. Cue pics of him now looking disappointed (read: desperate) and saying he'll hopefully make a small profit at least, depite the 'cooling' market.

2. Asian bloke buys 12th floor flat in Edmonton Green for 71k (despite guide price of 55k) in conjunction with his dad ('who has 20 years experience of property buying'). Building is heavily fortified from local attacks ('a high standard of security', chirps the presenter, pointing out numerous entry videophones, guards etc). *Horror* 'Experienced' dad then finds he can't get a mortgage for a flat over the 4th floor  :blink:  :blink:  (where has he been living? the moon? Surely most people know this, especially before parting with stacks of cash?) Luckily they manage to lean on their extended family for the balance. Son then promises it will be up for rent 2 weeks later but fannies about for 2 months putting in a coat of paint and a kitchen. says being a landlord is too much of a hassle (despite the fact he still hasn't got round to finding a tenant), 'except the bit where you see the money come into the bank'.

3. Blonde from the Wirral, buys 1 bed terrace without seeing it for 35k. Is a dump inside. Bats eyelashes at builder who converts it to a 2 bed (one shoebox with shower en-suite - and that's the only bathroom in the whole house) for 2k. Two estate agents come round. Cheery fat one says she could get 40k max, but bathroom looks a bit wrong so she needs planning permission for an extension to build a downstairs bathroom in. Camp EA with mullet looks like he's swallowed sick when he exists the house. BBC doesn't say what he thought it was worth.

Roll on the revolution. Who says the BBC can't do comedy anymore?

Yes great post

I only got round to watching this last night (on video) and needn’t have bothered your précis was very accurate

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In a similar vein I was working from home today given the weather, and during a coffee break got watching a daytime TV programme called..... 'I Want That House', the entire programme consisted of late middle aged muppets getting shown around ludicrously overpriced Spanish propeties ..... 'of there dreams' let me descibe one......

A two bedroom whitewashed house on a barren hilllside up a 4km dirt track from a motorway, no other houses in site, a large uncultivated patch of barren scrub 'oohh look at all this land you'll own' each bedroom had as the centre piece a ruddy great iron bar running at head hight through the middle of the room ' this is the traditional way Spanish houses are built' cooed the estate agent 'isn't it charaterful' rather than saying 'because this house has no foundations they literally pinned the whole thing together with steel rods, that's all that's holding your walls up. All this for £130,000!

What was bizzare was that the English couple didn't say 'You're having a laugh this place isn't worth 20K' they walked around persuading each other how exciting it all was, this was a barren deserted hillside :blink: They were looking for there primary permanent recidence :o what were they going to do when they get older and need a shop, a doctor, a home help, friends anything.

Is the baby boom generation having a collective lobotomy or something? Did they smoke too much pot in the sixties?

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Today I have been languishing on the sofa with sickness and watched this... possibly the biggest collection of idiots I have ever seen.

I've seen this once or twice and thought the same and that's not mentioning the presenters!

:lol:

I guess you didn't see the couple who bought a flat at auction for their just divorced daughter?

Well, they paid about £15k deposit (or was it £17k?) using their daughter's divorce settlement but didn't have a mortgage arranged. Aparently there is a rule where you have to settle the auction payment within about 30 days, needless to say they couldn't get a mortgage and they lost their daughter's money!

:lol::lol::lol:

Cue the pictures of a very upset mother. Sorry, I shouldn't gloat.

:lol::lol::lol:

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Well, they paid about £15k deposit (or was it £17k?) using their daughter's divorce settlement but didn't have a mortgage arranged.  Aparently there is a rule where you have to settle the auction payment within about 30 days, needless to say they couldn't get a mortgage and they lost their daughter's money!

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:

Cue the pictures of a very upset mother.  Sorry, I shouldn't gloat.

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:

Oh my god there's one born every minute isn't there. Jesus-h how can you go to an auction and not know that! Auction rules 10% deposit on the day and the rest within a month, and no you cannot change your mind :lol:

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Oh my god there's one born every minute isn't there. Jesus-h how can you go to an auction and not know that! Auction rules 10% deposit on the day and the rest within a month, and no you cannot change your mind  :lol:

Christ, no wonder Asian dad looked as sick as a parrot about the high rise. The other good part was that the presenter kept on going on about the wonderful local shopping centre, cue a shot of a run down mini-mall with an Iceland and several runty veg stalls. bet the pound shops were hiding behind the corner... I'm going to record it in future for proof that if this is what it's come to, BTL must be over and out. (See dotcom bandwagon for details of the 'all pile in, you can't lose' mentality).

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there was one on the other day where a bloke bought a detached block for 500K which had sea views.

He was a bit arrogant and said he could make 400K easily, by knocking it all down and building flats. One month later, he d knocked all down and what was left was bare - and nothing else. It turns out planning permission for construction of the new flats failed - and a appeal could take upto a year or more :P So one year of no profits.... :lol: and all this time it is depreciating.

In the same episode a rather fat man close to his 3rd heart attack was also a bit arrogant and bought a flat in brighton, proclaiming he always reads the legal pack. He wanted to let this out and use this as a 10 year investment. He paid 109K for a top floor shoe box with oblique sea views. One month later - hes only painted one room white to bring it up to scratch- and was unable to let out the flat - because it breaches the terms of the lease :blink::lol: Something he er missed reading.

There have been episodes where people have made some money - I guess its a bit of a mixture of some smart thinking and LUCK more than anything.

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In a similar vein I was working from home today given the weather, and during a coffee break got watching a daytime TV programme called..... 'I Want That House', the entire programme consisted of late middle aged muppets getting shown around ludicrously overpriced Spanish propeties ..... 'of there dreams' let me descibe one......

A two bedroom whitewashed house on a barren hilllside up a 4km dirt track from a motorway, no other houses in site, a large uncultivated patch of barren scrub 'oohh look at all this land you'll own' each bedroom had as the centre piece a ruddy great iron bar running at head hight through the middle of the room ' this is the traditional way Spanish houses are built' cooed the estate agent 'isn't it charaterful' rather than saying 'because this house has no foundations they literally pinned the whole thing together with steel rods, that's all that's holding your walls up.  All this for £130,000!

What was bizzare was that the English couple didn't say 'You're having a laugh this place isn't worth 20K' they walked around persuading each other how exciting it all was, this was a barren deserted hillside  :blink:  They were looking for there primary permanent recidence  :o  what were they going to do when they get older and need a shop, a doctor, a home help, friends anything.

Is the baby boom generation having a collective lobotomy or something? Did they smoke too much pot in the sixties?

In a similar vein I was working from home today given the weather, and during a coffee break

Heh heh, it's always tough working from home

I've got no self discipline either, always taking "coffee breaks" when I should be working.

I'm always much more productive when in the office, even if it is a pain in the **** to be there

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