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iluminati

Computer Says No

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3 weeks ago the strangest thing happened.

I bank with the Nationwide, but queues in my local branch are getting way beyond the joke (average waiting time 45 minutes !!!)

The building society next door is the Cumberland Building Society and their motto is "Be more than a number", so I made an appointment and went in to see what they can do for me.

I gave them a list of services I require.

1 x current account

1 x mortgage current account

1 x repayment mortgage (my deal runs out in a month)

1 x ISA

1 Instant access saver

1 x Buildings & Contents insurance

1 x car insurance

A nice commision earner for any salesperson. The lady was exeptionally friendly and I was surprised just how empty the branch was, she popped in my details and told me :

I have been declined for a current account, because of items on my credit file. The computer says "No". The usually drill of writing to Experian and Equifax and cough up £2 each for the priveledge. I got my files.

I have recieved a CIFAS warning for "Material Falsehoods - Application Declined".

Apparently I have the same name almost exactly as a former owner of my home who died in 1992 aged 97 years old. The computer thought I was trying to impersonate a would-be DEAD 112 year old. BTW I am much younger than that by considerable years.

They were prepared to offer me all the other services though including a mortgage. I subsequently got the hump with being declined, so I remained at the Nationwide BS.

So a lesson to be learnt, if you want a mortgage, but not a current account, simply impersonate a dead 112 year old, and your quids in. :lol:

Edited by iluminati

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3 weeks ago the strangest thing happened.

I bank with the Nationwide, but queues in my local branch are getting way beyond the joke (average waiting time 45 minutes !!!)

The building society next door is the Cumberland Building Society and their motto is "Be more than a number", so I made an appointment and went in to see what they can do for me.

I gave them a list of services I require.

1 x current account

1 x mortgage current account

1 x repayment mortgage (my deal runs out in a month)

1 x ISA

1 Instant access saver

1 x Buildings & Contents insurance

1 x car insurance

A nice commision earner for any salesperson. The lady was exeptionally friendly and I was surprised just how empty the branch was, she popped in my details and told me :

I have been declined for a current account, because of items on my credit file. The computer says "No". The usually drill of writing to Experian and Equifax and cough up £2 each for the priveledge. I got my files.

I have recieved a CIFAS warning for "Material Falsehoods - Application Declined".

Apparently I have the same name almost exactly as a former owner of my home who died in 1992 aged 97 years old. The computer thought I was trying to impersonate a would-be DEAD 112 year old. BTW I am much younger than that by considerable years.

They were prepared to offer me all the other services though including a mortgage. I subsequently got the hump with being declined, so I remained at the Nationwide BS.

So a lesson to be learnt, if you want a mortgage, but not a current account, simply impersonate a dead 112 year old, and your quids in. :lol:

Good post! These big financial organisations seem to be managed by hampsters these days. I am fascinated to see what will happen when the tide starts to go out.

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When GC2 finally happens, it will suddenly be very obvious to the banks why things went so badly wrong. This is the kind of anti-logic that could really wind a person up if they let it. :angry:

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Shows how the banking system works these days:

current account: bank has risk

mortgage: bank doesn't give a f*ck, packages your dodgy loan and sells it to a pension fund.

:o

Exactly my friend. This is so wrong. Punters (Us) go into a bank (them) get a mortgage that we have no way of paying back. They realise this and sell off the mortgage to a city broker (parasite) who for a commission sell it on to a pension fund managed by another city broker (parasite) for a fee We (the punter) own the liability of the mortgage and the risk of the pension fund. We take all the risk, pay all of the premium and receive no fees

"Them parasites" are f***ing us "punters" and ther is nothing we can do about it

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Exactly my friend. This is so wrong. Punters (Us) go into a bank (them) get a mortgage that we have no way of paying back. They realise this and sell off the mortgage to a city broker (parasite) who for a commission sell it on to a pension fund managed by another city broker (parasite) for a fee We (the punter) own the liability of the mortgage and the risk of the pension fund. We take all the risk, pay all of the premium and receive no fees

"Them parasites" are f***ing us "punters" and ther is nothing we can do about it

This is usually called an "insurance". A group of people gets together, everyone pays a fee, and if something goes wrong the collective pays

for it (with the fees). In the above case, however, the fees get used otherwise. :lol:

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Crazy isn't it, i got turned down for a mobile phone the other day, despite paying £30 a month to 02, - it seems my change of address wasn't popular on my credit scoring ? hmm... oh and i don't use a credit card, so indeed, not worthy of credit... edit (i feel compelled to add, i own a credit card, but choose not to use it) what crazyness world is this, oh but the bank will give me a £150k noose to put round my neck!!! and this phone was only £15 a month!! they asked me to pay a deposit!! i'm not some chavved up 17 y/o i'm a 27 year old profession - a f*king deposit for a phone!!! i told them to **** off ;0) sorry for the swearing but it just seems to flow so naturally on this forum with the vent up frustration with house prices, credit and the economy, it's f*king hilarious (there i go again). good job i only post irratically and on monthly intervals now!

what a joke...!! bet if i lived in a housing association flat for 10 years on benefits i'd get one 'steady income, there you go sir'!!! i mean what gives!! prudent, good income.. nah you can't have a poxy phone!!!

incredible - my wife gets one - no job, house wife i hasten to add.. oh the distinguishing factor she regularly uses her credit card!!! she probably has a better credit rating than me!!! ironic or what.

Edited by lewissheridan

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Hey Lewis, I really admire your restraint in only posting on a monthly basis. This place is the bane of my life.

I find it difficult to talk to some people these days, their view of reality is so different to mine that they seem like aliens.

Is it time to get professional help, or is everyone else mad? Actually, I think it's them. Psychiatrists consider being too in touch with reality a form of mental illness, no wonder I feel sick. :wacko:

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Crazy isn't it, i got turned down for a mobile phone the other day, despite paying £30 a month to 02, - it seems my change of address wasn't popular on my credit scoring ? hmm... oh and i don't use a credit card, so indeed, not worthy of credit... edit (i feel compelled to add, i own a credit card, but choose not to use it) what crazyness world is this, oh but the bank will give me a £150k noose to put round my neck!!! and this phone was only £15 a month!! they asked me to pay a deposit!! i'm not some chavved up 17 y/o i'm a 27 year old profession - a f*king deposit for a phone!!! i told them to **** off ;0) sorry for the swearing but it just seems to flow so naturally on this forum with the vent up frustration with house prices, credit and the economy, it's f*king hilarious (there i go again). good job i only post irratically and on monthly intervals now!

what a joke...!! bet if i lived in a housing association flat for 10 years on benefits i'd get one 'steady income, there you go sir'!!! i mean what gives!! prudent, good income.. nah you can't have a poxy phone!!!

incredible - my wife gets one - no job, house wife i hasten to add.. oh the distinguishing factor she regularly uses her credit card!!! she probably has a better credit rating than me!!! ironic or what.

Swearing. No apology needed on my account. I dont mind saying I did some swearing myself. I find it utterly insulting to be a position, where you are sat in a bank, building society or mobile phone store and they say " We need to conduct a credit check".

I am in the mind to say in future to them, "I do not give my permission for a check to be conducted and I have lost interest in your product/service".

This may seem like I am being all high and mighty, its not. It is to save myself the embarrasment of being told "You have been declined" and that pathetic look they always give you, like you are to be pitied.

I dont want pity, I just want the ****ing service or product and if I cant get it without some computer thinking I am 112 years old, then **** it.

Sorry everyone, but the way credit distributed in this country sucks big time.

Whats also a joke is when they try to offer you a mickey mouse card instead, so for instance you want a Visa Delta card, you end up with a Visa Electron card, so everytime you pay for goods with it, everyone in the queue behind you knows you have the brand on you of not credit worthy.

A line must be drawn in the sand.

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Apparently I have the same name almost exactly as a former owner of my home who died in 1992 aged 97 years old.

That's quite a coincidence when you consider what an unusual name "Iluminati" is.

;)

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....I find it difficult to talk to some people these days, their view of reality is so different to mine that they seem like aliens.

Is it time to get professional help, or is everyone else mad?...

I thought it was just me who thought like that! :lol:

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At least you found out why it was declined. For years I tried to keep my Egg credit card limit at £1000. They kept putting it up to £5000. After putting it down to £500 for a while I tried to raise it to the massive sum of £750. 'Computer says no'. This is despite selling a BTL property and paying off both mortgages. I have a steady income, no CCJ's no arrears, no mortgage, no loans, and a total debt of £250. So apparently I'm a bad credit risk.

Next I applied to Abbey - got a credit card with a £10,000 limit given to me. Haven't used it for anything and probably won't ever now as I'm saving the money I need to DIY the bathroom. Now I'm getting pestered by Abbey with spam mail to 'tempt me to spend'. Obviously I don't earn the banks enough money to make it worth their while.

Perhaps the result of Great Crash 2 will be Great Recession 2 when the sheeple decide on mass not to borrow. This would impact the financial world greatly.

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I am in the mind to say in future to them, "I do not give my permission for a check to be conducted and I have lost interest in your product/service".

I wonder, given the tricks that the financial sector seem to be up to lending/creating money in ever imaginative ways, whether it isn't time for us to ask to credit check them. Culd be priceless to see the look on their faces. Only problem being that it would be a customer service person, not a top brass.

Crazy isn't it, i got turned down for a mobile phone the other day, despite paying £30 a month to 02, - it seems my change of address wasn't popular on my credit scoring ?

This is curious because on the MSE forum it is always said that addresses aren't a factor in a credit rating, only names that one actually shares a financial link with.

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I wonder, given the tricks that the financial sector seem to be up to lending/creating money in ever imaginative ways, whether it isn't time for us to ask to credit check them. Culd be priceless to see the look on their faces. Only problem being that it would be a customer service person, not a top brass.

My favourite is when some telesales cretin calls you and asks for your name and address 'for security purposes'. eh? How does that work then? It's hardly secure to be giving my details out to the first tom dick or harry who calls claiming to be from my bank.

So now I always ask them for their name, address, location, company and payroll number before proceeding. Most realise it's not worth the effort of dealing with someone like me and just hang up.

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I find it difficult to talk to some people these days, their view of reality is so different to mine that they seem like aliens.

To be honest I feel a bit the same... Had an 18year old family member telling me that rent is a waste and at least with a mortgage you 'get something'... says the chap who wastes ever penny (and more) that he has on, well, what exactly?!?!

Oh, and I saw a 'financial advisor' yesterday... I'd give you an anecdote, but you will all say "what do you expect" (last minute decision to see the fa as the computer says... person behind the reception couldn't answer my simple question on an ISA product).

Edited by Jason

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1 x current account

1 x mortgage current account

1 x repayment mortgage (my deal runs out in a month)

1 x ISA

1 Instant access saver

1 x Buildings & Contents insurance

1 x car insurance

don't mean to pry into your affairs, but if thats true your missing out on a lot of good deals by sticking with the same provider for all these products. ow crap i'm starting to sound like martin lewis

all your eggs in one basket and all that

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Guest grumpy-old-man
I thought it was just me who thought like that! :lol:

add me to the list as well please. ;)

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I have been declined for a current account, because of items on my credit file. The computer says "No". The usually drill of writing to Experian and Equifax and cough up £2 each for the priveledge. I got my files.

I have recieved a CIFAS warning for "Material Falsehoods - Application Declined".

Apparently I have the same name almost exactly as a former owner of my home who died in 1992 aged 97 years old. The computer thought I was trying to impersonate a would-be DEAD 112 year old. BTW I am much younger than that by considerable years.

:lol:

A similar thing happened to me several years ago when I applied for a current account - with Nationwide, as it happens. I already had a current account with another bank. And I already had an ISA with Nationwide. But they turned down my current account application without even writing to tell me. When I called them a month or so later, I discovered that the credit check had come back with "too low a score" for them to offer me a current account. This was particularly suspect since I'd just moved into a new flat and the letting agents had received a clean credit report for me just a few months earlier.

Turns out, when I finally got hold of my own credit file, that the morons had mistyped my postcode when they ran the check, and then decided that I had fabricated my address.

The really galling thing was that I didn't even want any credit! I just wanted a little bit of extra interest on my current account. I wanted to give them money, not borrow it. I'm sure if I'd been after a loan, they probably wouldn't have bothered trying to find an excuse to refuse me credit.

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This is curious because on the MSE forum it is always said that addresses aren't a factor in a credit rating, only names that one actually shares a financial link with.

Addresses are a factor unfortunately. Apparently my area's demographic is mainly studenty/young coupley which is a negative.

If you want to find out more about your credit record for FREE check out Garlik.com

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Addresses are a factor unfortunately. Apparently my area's demographic is mainly studenty/young coupley which is a negative.

The great thing about renting is that my address is a house that would sell for at least a million and change...

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The great thing about renting is that my address is a house that would sell for at least a million and change...

Well that's the thing. Terraceds in this area are going for £300K+, basement flats for £225K+ and yet it's considered a less than desirable postcode. The mind boggles.

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Crazy isn't it, i got turned down for a mobile phone the other day, despite paying £30 a month to 02, - it seems my change of address wasn't popular on my credit scoring ?...
Because of the way identity is mismanaged in this country, credit checks seem to be mostly about address.

I tried to purchase a contract phone at my student address and got the minimum credit score, i.e. maximum cost with an extra deposit. Disgusted, expecting better with my bearish credit history (including previous phone contracts) I asked to change my address that of my parents.

Instant maximum credit score. :blink:

I then had my billing address routed back to my student address, end of story.

My parents are of course part of the propertied classes, but I assume the largest problem was with the student dig, being that the various utility companies have a habit of billing tenants six months after they’ve move out. If you understand the system you can beat it, hence the huge about of credit fraud and identity theft. Also don’t assume that this is just criminal gangs doing this, you bank manager is just as likely to be involved in such a scam.

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The really absurd thing about all this is that I can open a current account in an English bank here is OZ with no credit check at all. Just plonk a minimum of 1500GBP into the account and pick up my EFT card at the main branch at Regent street when I get there.

That's it!

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The really absurd thing about all this is that I can open a current account in an English bank here is OZ with no credit check at all.

You presumably don't have the stupid 'money laundering' laws that we do?

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