Flash Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 This is not a joke - it is from today's Irish Times property porn supplement. I stopped finding this stuff funny a long time ago, now I just despair. Is there anywhere else in the world where the investment case is this ridiculous? Worth the Investment? Edel Morgan The address: 44 Pembroke Gardens, Ballsbridge, Dublin 4. The agent: Gunne Residential. The property: four-bedroom townhouse for €1.4 million, representing a cost of €10,769 per sq m (€1,000 per sq ft). How much for an investor? The repayments on an 85 per cent mortgage at a buy-to-let tracker rate of 4.17 per cent APR over 25 years would be €6,343 per month. On an interest-only loan the repayments would be €4,066 per month. How much for a residential buyer? At AIB's discounted tracker rate of 4.11 per cent APR, the repayments over 35 years would be €5,397 per month. Repayments at AIB's standard variable rate of 4.33 per cent APR would be €5,886 per month. On a 100 per cent mortgage at AIB's one-year discounted tracker rate of 4.11 per cent over 35 years, the repayments would be €5,866 per month for the first year. Potential: prime rental location. This property could fetch a rent of around €2,500 per month. Verdict: the rental return doesn't come close to meeting the mortgage repayments on either an 85 per cent annuity or interest-only mortgage. Only for an investor looking for medium to long term capital gain or a residential buyer. Link Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DabHand Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 No disrespect to you or your fine country and its inhabitants, but the Irish response to low euro rates has been akin to locking a smackhead in a cupboard full of methadone. The Irish are in danger of turning their country back into a basketcase far faster than any redirected EU finding ever would. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
?...! Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 "Only for an investor looking for medium to long term capital gain or a residential buyer." AKA someone who dislikes money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gone baby gone Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 This is not a joke - it is from today's Irish Times property porn supplement. I stopped finding this stuff funny a long time ago, now I just despair. Is there anywhere else in the world where the investment case is this ridiculous? Link Wow, that's quite some investment. You pay €1,500 a month on top of your 15% deposit of €210,000 in the hope of long term capital gains. This is indeed a sad reflection of how bad it's got. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DabHand Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Wow, that's quite some investment. You pay €1,500 a month on top of your 15% deposit of €210,000 in the hope of long term capital gains. This is indeed a sad reflection of how bad it's got. Indeed you need at leat 9% HPI yoy to break even on the subsidy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quinndexter Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Wow, that's quite some investment. You pay €1,500 a month on top of your 15% deposit of €210,000 in the hope of long term capital gains. This is indeed a sad reflection of how bad it's got. Yep. Only a fecking ejut would buy that..........or someone with a massive wad of cash who would buy it outright. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DabHand Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Which you'd only do if you were going to live in it. And anyone with that sort of dosh wouldnt live there. All roads lead to nonsense! (not you, the scenario) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AssetIndigestion Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Check out these beauties and prices. http://www1.myhome.ie/search/search_result...Local=glasthule Remember, Irish financial institutions are lending out big time in this silliness. I keep wondering when international hedge funds are going to take note and move in for the killing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walktothewater Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Wow, that's quite some investment. You pay €1,500 a month on top of your 15% deposit of €210,000 in the hope of long term capital gains. This is indeed a sad reflection of how bad it's got. and let's not forget the stamp duty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shedfish Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Crikey - what you get for your Euro! Eire In Germany the same amount gets you this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duplex Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 It's off the scale, mad, madder, utter madness, frothing at the mouth. Dublin goes Dubai Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DabHand Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 (edited) That video is sooo hom. So er..who buys these houses..seriously? Are there jobs that allow people to service a EU 650K mortgage? Buy to letters hoping the pyramid keeps going? I'm agog. Edited September 21, 2006 by DabHand Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duplex Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 That video is sooo hom. So er..who buys these houses..seriously? Are there jobs that allow people to service a EU 650K mortgage? Buy to letters hoping the pyramid keeps going? I'm agog. 'The development will have the worlds only all giraffe zoo' I ask you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted September 21, 2006 Author Share Posted September 21, 2006 It's off the scale, mad, madder, utter madness, frothing at the mouth. Dublin goes Dubai Absolutely fantastic! That had me for a while. I could watch that over and over. The wierd thing is, there's an on-line registration form?!? That's bound to suck a few muppets in. What are they going to do with that info? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duplex Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Absolutely fantastic! That had me for a while. I could watch that over and over. The wierd thing is, there's an on-line registration form?!? That's bound to suck a few muppets in. What are they going to do with that info? This place is soooo bonkers it had me going to, I have confess. But the giraffe only zoo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gone baby gone Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 (edited) It's off the scale, mad, madder, utter madness, frothing at the mouth. Dublin goes Dubai Fecking hell!!! Please tell me Chris Morris is making another series of Brass Eye and this is the first episode..? This cannot be real! "The time has come for new thinking.". An island in the shape of a shamrock with green lights on the edge Edited September 21, 2006 by redalert Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
urban_hymn Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 What small primitive looking hovels they are. Homes for rich leprechauns I would guess! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
?...! Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Can someone confirm that is a spoof - the video/website look very expensive for a spoof. It's more likely some kind of architectural sales/investment demo/propaganda, the kind that firms use to demonstrate their ambitious capabilities, the kind that crop up when a particular sector or industry has a short lived embarrassment of riches. The worlds only all Giraffe Zoo probably prequalifies some ice breaking joke to help the sales team feel less nervous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted September 21, 2006 Author Share Posted September 21, 2006 Can someone confirm that is a spoof - the video/website look very expensive for a spoof. Well if you believe the giraffe only zoo, surely the bit about flooding during the rainy season (all year round) might have you wondering? Second thoughts. If you believe it, why not register? I want to find out what happens if you do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
undersupply Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Can someone confirm that is a spoof - the video/website look very expensive for a spoof. Yes I can Even spoofs are expensive in Ireland Click on the Register Interest options for salary and occupation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shedfish Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 (edited) it's a second-home playground for Evil Geniuses and secret agents, when they hit the 'nesting' stage. Helium was inhaled to keep the run time down in the making of this video. barking. bark bark awwww so if a 1 bedroom cottage big enough for an under 5, full of 'old Dublin charm' goes for sizeably more than half a million quid, how much would a 'Blofeldt' underwater penthouse with a fake sea lid and en-suite cost? Edited September 21, 2006 by Shedfish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quinndexter Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Hmmmmm. "Submarines will deposit assorted debris on the sea floor" FTB'ers maybe? Man, is it me or is that video very similar to the ones featured in the game DOOM 3? Obviously its a promo for the property site and not really reality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shedfish Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 I was thinking it would be a home from home for me... i bet you stick your post-its to the Big Red Button Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted September 21, 2006 Author Share Posted September 21, 2006 Oh, I'm not saying I believe it. I'm just amazed that so much money could be spent on something that's not that funny. It's certainly linked to an upcoming Irish rightmove site - and a free iPod - very reputable. I guess you need to be here in Dublin to appreciate how surreal this place is when it comes to property - Amateurs with zero business acumen and Euro signs in their eyes are becoming obscenely rich with no effort whatsoever. It is truly bizarre beyond words. I found the video hilarious because I KNOW that some here WILL be sucked in by it and will be chomping at the bit to get on board regardless of how much it costs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shedfish Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 I do expect more and more of these sorts of crazy developments to actually occur in the future - but there's not time for this one before the megabust. I like to use this handy list (scroll down a page or two to get past my lawyers' provisos): Evil overlord checklist "21) I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set." - beump -- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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