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The Pitfalls Of Buying With A Friend.

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Guest Baffled_by_it_all

I've been living with a mate for the past few years. We started out as good friends. Used to go on holiday together etc. The pressure of sharing a flat has driven a wedge between us over time - small things eventually start to grate (someone doesn't do the hoovering, the other person doesn't buy any washing up liquid etc)

We're about to go our seperate ways. I'm pretty sanguine about it. After all, even a third of marriages end in divorce, never mind rental agreements decided down the pub.

But things would be very different if we'd chosen to get a joint mortage to 'get on the ladder' Makes me shudder to think about the mess we'd both be in now.

PS - He's decided to buy a poky flat in the middle of nowhere at 200 quid more than his monthly rent I/O - oops...

Edited by Baffled_by_it_all

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I've been living with a mate for the past few years. We started out as good friends. Used to go on holiday together etc. The pressure of sharing a flat has driven a wedge between us over time - small things eventually start to grate (someone doesn't do the hoovering, the other person doesn't buy any washing up liquid etc)

It terrifies me that people are being persuaded to buy with friends.

Having rented shared houses I saw that relationships can quickly deteriorate when people have to live with someone else.

I'll never forget coming home to find all the flowers I planted burning on the bonfire.

People who bought years ago have no idea what shared living can lead to and programmes like "Buy with a stranger?" or whatever its called are just downright dangerous.

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It terrifies me that people are being persuaded to buy with friends.

Having rented shared houses I saw that relationships can quickly deteriorate when people have to live with someone else.

I'll never forget coming home to find all the flowers I planted burning on the bonfire.

People who bought years ago have no idea what shared living can lead to and programmes like "Buy with a stranger?" or whatever its called are just downright dangerous.

And won't they end up trying to sell a half share in the flat, which could be just a little tricky?

Billy Shears

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And won't they end up trying to sell a half share in the flat, which could be just a little tricky?

Billy Shears

Exactly.

All the advice first time buyers are getting at the moment, whether it is to buy a shared ownership flat or buy with a friend / stranger are based entirely on getting on the all important ladder.

The advice that everyone is giving out, not just vested interests or property programmes, is that getting on the ladder is worth all and every sacrifice and questions about how to move up the ladder later on are answered by "wage inflation will reduce the cost of your mortgage". This is one of the reasons why, ages ago, I posted a thread asking about whether people thought that wage inflation was likely to occur in the next few years.

Some people think that it will and do not seem to see the implications that this has for their own HPC arguments. Others maintain that if the Bank of England says there will be no wage inflation then there won't be because, I don't know, we can trust the Bank of England and they will get they want.

I do not believe that wage inflation will happen in the way that many bulls believe it will, though nor do I believe this is because the Bank of England and the Chancellor always get what they want. It is more of a hunch based on the baby boomer demographic but I can't explain more than that because I simply don't know why I don't believe wage inflation will happen over the long term.

People ignore this question, but at the end of the day if people who buy a massively overpriced newbuild flat now are going to see the cost of that debt depreciate massively against wage inflation then that would be a major argument against a house price crash. So it is worth discussing.

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And won't they end up trying to sell a half share in the flat, which could be just a little tricky?

Billy Shears

Shared ownership? Prezza would be proud!

£220k for a 40% share of this hovel....flatmate included.

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The worst thing about these "Buy with a stranger" sort of programmes, is the one I saw, at least, involved seriously predatory, unresolved and unrequited libidinal cathexis by the she. Image if Michael Douglas were to have been buying a property with Glenn Close instead of just shagging her?

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Anyone thinking of buying with a friend should try six months of shared house living first in a rental - not some nostagia fest for their student days, but sharing in the here and now.

I doubt any friendship can survive sharing. People you start out thinking are OK drive you nuts after a while; I could cheerfully murder the guy in my house who sniffs the whole time and never ever blows his nose. Or the guy who always has to shake his orange carton incredibly vigorously...it might all sound trivial but it gets to you eventually. When the crash comes I'll be first in line for somewhere BY MYSELF, whatever it is.

If you're going to buy with someone else, you should buy with someone you dislike. That way you know it isn't likely to get any worse.

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Guest

Anyone thinking of buying with a friend should try six months of shared house living first in a rental

This is an excellent idea, and it should be heavily subsidised by Estate Agents, Lenders, and the government, AND current home owners (though a new tax), and builders, since they are the only ones with vested interests in high property prices.

I would suggest trial periods extending up to 2 years. Or maybe ten - just to be totally sure.

Only then would both parties agree to sign up to dual ownership.

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Anyone thinking of buying with a friend should try six months of shared house living first in a rental - not some nostagia fest for their student days, but sharing in the here and now.

I doubt any friendship can survive sharing. People you start out thinking are OK drive you nuts after a while; I could cheerfully murder the guy in my house who sniffs the whole time and never ever blows his nose. Or the guy who always has to shake his orange carton incredibly vigorously...it might all sound trivial but it gets to you eventually. When the crash comes I'll be first in line for somewhere BY MYSELF, whatever it is.

If you're going to buy with someone else, you should buy with someone you dislike. That way you know it isn't likely to get any worse.

Did I live with you? A chap I used to live with kept sniffing, it used to drive me bloody mad. I couldn't watch a film with him in the room! Infact, you could spoil a visitors evening by pointing out the sniffing - even when he didn't have a runny nose.

Those were the days...

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Ah, the joys of sharing.

People who won't clean up.

People who throw their rubbish on the floor rather than in the bin.

People who piss on the toilet seat.

People who refuse to take responsibility for anything they've just broken.

People who insist on you contacting the letting agency/landlord, because they don't know how to.

People who, on moving in, instantly grab the biggest bedroom, best shelves in the kitchen, best chair in the living room...and then do sod all to help around the place.

People who wander around the house with very little clothing on. (The same ones who are really not in good shape - and they haven't showered)

People who make you deal with setting up gas/electricity/water/council tax/TV license/etc because they don't know how to.

Glad I don't share anymore.

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Ah, the joys of sharing.

People who won't clean up.

Glad I don't share anymore.

People who leave cups and plates in their rooms until there is nothing left in the kitchen. People who never put the bin out. People who stamp on the stairs even when they're being quiet.

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People who leave cups and plates in their rooms until there is nothing left in the kitchen. People who never put the bin out. People who stamp on the stairs even when they're being quiet.

People who have a cockatiel that's allowed to fly freely around the house crapping all over the place and refusing to clear up after it even when the all the shelves and the TV is encrusted with a thick layer of birdshit.

People who have insomnia and do the vacuuming and DIY at 5am.

People who masturbate in the shower and clog up the plug hole with a mixture of spunk and hair.

Ah...the joys of sharing.

Edited by devslim

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People who bring a sofa to the shared flat, and then demand the right to lie on it - even though there is not enough seating left for other people - when they come home from their 'high-powered' NuLab makework fat-pensioned overpaid public sector added-valueless job.

And then have their girlfriends round 80% of the time, and imply that you should go out so that they can have some privacy. And spend the other 20% expecting you to sit there and listen to them whine about their girlfriend and their oh-so-difficult easy life.

Bitter? Me? I'd love to buy with someone. No potential disasters there!

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People who have a cockatiel that's allowed to fly freely around the house crapping all over the place and refusing to clear up after it even when the all the shelves and the TV is encrusted with a thick layer of birdshit.

I heard a nightmare story last week about a Surgeon here in South Wales - a SURGEON - who is a rabbit nut and has a large collection of bunny rabbits which, wait for this, he and his wife allow full run of their house.. the kitchen, the living rooms, the bedrooms.

A friend who visited was horrified to see these rabbits, sorry for this, pooping all over the house and occasionally there was paper placed n chairs, beds, etc., on which the rabbits did, um, their business...

This man is a SURGEON for goodness sake!

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I heard a nightmare story last week about a Surgeon here in South Wales - a SURGEON - who is a rabbit nut and has a large collection of bunny rabbits which, wait for this, he and his wife allow full run of their house.. the kitchen, the living rooms, the bedrooms.

A friend who visited was horrified to see these rabbits, sorry for this, pooping all over the house and occasionally there was paper placed n chairs, beds, etc., on which the rabbits did, um, their business...

This man is a SURGEON for goodness sake!

This thread is a brilliant antithesis of the BS fed to us by that stupid, stupid programme on the BBC ;)

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A friend of mine now lives 3 hours away from me now and I love going to stop with her and her family, but after a couple of days I can't wait to get back to my own space. Vice versa and same with family too.

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Or what about the friends who decide to buy a place together and then one of them says "you can only have your girlfriend round on certain nights?", whilst his girlfriend virtually ends up living there? Or the friends who 'borrow' all your clothes, because they can't be bothered to wash theirs? Or the friend who blocks the toilet up with vomit because she's bulimic, but won't admit it to anyone, even though everyone else can hear her puking up? Or the friend who's an emotional minefield and decides to attempt suicide and let you know about it/pick up the pieces?

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The most unpleasant professional flatshare I had was with a bunch of Kiwis and Aussies - they were great until two of them started going out together - being told I was out of order for coming in at 11pm (straight from work) and then being confronted three days running by the sight of the pair of them with their hands down each others' trousers was a bit much.

Their house spreadsheet costed slices (not loaves) of bread and allocated them to different people. Yes, they were auditors. Their Aussie mates that were staying over used to sleep in your bed while you are at work, my car keys went missing for two days (!) and they used to use your clothes when theirs stunk too bad.

Not an experience I enjoyed much - came to a head when they called me at the office and demanded I come home for a house meeting to discuss the disappearance of a bit of peanut butter [i had eaten when p1ssed and replaced the entire jar the morning after]. t0ssers. I did laugh at the pitiful petty crap they thought important.

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****** that. id rather live in a tent on a beach somewhere and keep my coin in a bank earning interest that buy a house with either a stranger or a friend. Shows how stupid britain has become with programs like "buy with a stranger" cilly sunts.

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Gosh that's odd. All my flat mates have been great and we've got on like a house on fire.

Except for the time a housemate let a guy sleep in my room, who proceeded to vomit in my bed.

And for the Charlton supporter.

And for the woman who said nothing to me for weeks on end.

Other than that sharing's been fine!

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House share with this aggresive E European woman (lot of them are, from what I've seen). Every time I cooked anything with any smell at all she'd moan like hell, open the windows and freeze the place out. Her room was upstairs so she was fine - mine was downstairs so I got cold. You wouldn't believe how many people are too stupid to realise that opening upstairs windows makes the downstairs cold. It also doesn't seem to occur to them that even if they don't have anything worth stealing, you might.

After this went on for months she finally realised that the girl downstairs in the back room was making pot noodles up in her room - and did they stink. Months of grief for something I wasn't even responsible for.

Present house - I had to complain to the landlady because one of the guys, in shaving, sprays the mirror, sink and wall with a mixture of soap scum and beard stubble - which then runs down the walls and congeals into paste. Glad to say that's improved.

Anyone who thinks house-sharing - buying with a friend - is a good idea needs a serious reality check. Yet another recipe for lots of angry embittered young people. The only house shares I've seen that work are students, sometimes, as they know it's temporary and they'll tell stories about it ever after, and very young middle-class professionals who believe they'll buy their own place and haven't yet realised how sh!t their situation really is. Otherwise it's a ********* nightmare and I can't wait to get out of it.

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  • 301 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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