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Kingsoak Homes - Kings Of Laughable Prices On Junk?

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A while back I learned new flats were to be built on a patch of ground at the end of a sadly grubby street in Watford that got marooned way back when they built a big shopping centre and town-strangling ring road.

When I hear that new flats are to be built I usually shrug and think, 'yeah, highly priced yuppy flats'.

As this location is so bad - right on four lane grinding, constantly fume-coughing ring road, shadownd by fortress-like mall and brutal mobile-phone mast covered YMCA skyscraper, overlooking vomit stained steps at the back of market where greasy-haired kids skateboard all day and a multi-storey carpark, this time I thought...

... 'well at least we'll be getting some much needed housing association flats'.

No way! Kingsoak loonies reckon this small patch of urban-decay skankiness should get the full on yuppy hutch treatment for £266k a pop!

Just go to right move and look what you can get for that, even allowing for the massively overvalued market.

I can't imagine anyone able to splash out 266k wanting a cramped hole in the middle of the grot. They wouldn't compare well to existing flats at 150k.

Edited by CrashedOutAndBurned

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Walked passed it today on my way to the Harlequin but didn't go in. Saw some bloke holding a clutch of balloons - presumably filled with very hot air.

I echo your sentiments about the location - although you forgot to mention the tramps under the arch there.

There is absolutely no way on this earth they will get £266k for a 2 bed there - not when 2 beds on Andrew Reed Court are asking (and sticking like superglue) at between 200 and 240 (apart from the comedy 2 bed £395k offering that's been on for years).

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Saw some bloke holding a clutch of balloons - presumably filled with very hot air.

Did he have a big red nose and a massive pair of floppy shoes on?

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Kingsoak were also advertising in Investor's Chronicle (of all places !!!) this week, guaranteeing 8% yields (duh!, Homer!):

2 beds Napier Rd, Reading = from 229,995

(penhouses from 499,995)

2 beds London Road, Ascot = from 279,995

2 beds Burlington Avenue, Slough = from 179,995

If you want one: Kingsoakhomes

Alternatively, join the John Betjeman Chapter of Al-Quaida.

Slough by John Betjeman

Come, friendly bombs, and fall on Slough

It isn't fit for humans now,

There isn't grass to graze a cow

Swarm over, Death!

Come, bombs, and blow to smithereens

Those air-conditioned, bright canteens,

Tinned fruit, tinned meat, tinned milk, tinned beans

Tinned minds, tinned breath.

Mess up the mess they call a town --

A house for ninety-seven down

And once a week for half-a-crown

For twenty years,

And get that man with double chin

Who'll always cheat and always win,

Who washes his repulsive skin

In women's tears,

And smash his desk of polished oak

And smash his hands so used to stroke

And stop his boring dirty joke

And make him yell.

But spare the bald young clerks who add

The profits of the stinking cad;

It's not their fault that they are mad,

They've tasted Hell.

It's not their fault they do not know

The birdsong from the radio,

It's not their fault they often go

To Maidenhead

And talk of sports and makes of cars

In various bogus Tudor bars

And daren't look up and see the stars

But belch instead.

In labour-saving homes, with care

Their wives frizz out peroxide hair

And dry it in synthetic air

And paint their nails.

Come, friendly bombs, and fall on Slough

To get it ready for the plough.

The cabbages are coming now;

The earth exhales.

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  • 302 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

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      • down 5% +
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