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Austin Allegro

Happily married men - are you one?

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The 'deluded old scrapper birds' thread has got me thinking -  how many genuinely happily married men do I know? I can only think of one or two, and even those I'm not quite sure about. All I hear is negative stories about marriage, but is this because people are more likely to complain if they're unhappy?

So come one - are you a happily married man? Let's hear your stories, and how you manage to make life with 'her indoors' a success. 

Some criteria: you must be a heterosexual male married (or unmarried but living together as man and wife in what used to be called common-law marriage) for at least five years and you must be 'happy', by which I mean you would prefer to live in your current state than any other. 

 

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I actually had a nightmare last night that I had gone back to one of my former girlfriends, so I reckon I must know I am onto a good thing with my present partner ( meeting the criteria of over five years).

I think money worries and being Opposites are big relationship killers. Neither applies.

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I am recently divorced, I will never get married again. 

Now to be fair my wife realized it was slowly killing me so as my best  friend said she would let me go and release me of my responsibilities. Now because I worked to the pay the bills while she built her business she is going to pay me now to sit on my **** and do the stuff I missed out on cause I was working 18 hour days for 20 years to put food on the table.

I know this is extremely rare but she is a special person like that. She paid for the "quickie" divorce but you have no idea the constant harassment she had from lawyers trying to take me for everything I was worth. Divorce is very much an industry now. The laws are heavily weighted against men probably why the male suicide rate is so high. I was very very lucky.

TBH I was never entirely sure why I got married, family pressure society pressure, as a bloke you sort of do what is expected of you and forgo yourself. I would say to any man to avoid marriage until some sort of justice can be brought back to the law. Most of the married blokes I know are utterly miserable and trapped by these laws, its either sit and bear it or leave and be taken for all your shit and live in a bedsit. 

I completely understand men who go MGTOW the game is dangerously rigged and can utterly destroy you.

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2 hours ago, Sandwiches33 said:

TBH I was never entirely sure why I got married, family pressure society pressure, as a bloke you sort of do what is expected of you and forgo yourself.

Very good comment. I think loads of people just don't actually understand what they are doing when they marry. They haven't thought it through (not properly) and haven't actually taken the time to seriously think about whether it is what they actually want. The same goes for having children. 

People just seem to stumble into marriage. Stumble into having children. And then complain later when it (nearly inevitably given the divorce rates) goes wrong.

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Yup, happily married for just shy of 20 years now.  My only slight gripe is she never wanted children, but I'm not sure I wanted children either so I can live with that.

Only got married because she was about to be deported by the Home Office as well, so a most unlikely marriage to last.  I think it helps that we take breaks from each other and generally give each other a lot of room.

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Yes, but only because I am fully eyes open as to the fact that it could all end in disaster tomorrow and have therefore planned accordingly financially so I will not be **** raped by the courts.  Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.

It also works because I have learnt from the red pill sites how to keep a woman in a LTR interested in you.  That, by the way, involves forgetting everything society, relationship counsellors, and other women tell me from the age of ten onwards.

Hoping it lasts for 50 years.  Prepared if it doesn't.

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3 hours ago, Sandwiches33 said:

Now to be fair my wife realized it was slowly killing me so as my best  friend said she would let me go and release me of my responsibilities. Now because I worked to the pay the bills while she built her business she is going to pay me now to sit on my **** and do the stuff I missed out on cause I was working 18 hour days for 20 years to put food on the table.

I know this is extremely rare but she is a special person like that. She paid for the "quickie" divorce but you have no idea the constant harassment she had from lawyers trying to take me for everything I was worth. Divorce is very much an industry now. The laws are heavily weighted against men probably why the male suicide rate is so high. I was very very lucky.

TBH I was never entirely sure why I got married, family pressure society pressure, as a bloke you sort of do what is expected of you and forgo yourself. I would say to any man to avoid marriage until some sort of justice can be brought back to the law. Most of the married blokes I know are utterly miserable and trapped by these laws, its either sit and bear it or leave and be taken for all your shit and live in a bedsit. 

I completely understand men who go MGTOW the game is dangerously rigged and can utterly destroy you.

Bloody lucky there, pal. This is the most recent mgtow videos I have viewed:

I'm happily unmarried. I love the freedom to do almost whatever the f*** I want whenever I want.

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Very happily married. 17 years this year.

2 kids. Wife and I work together from home. Stressful at times but I can honestly say we have never had a proper argument.

We have had a hell of a lot of fun on the way. Looking forward to the future which starts next year with the kids going their own way.

I think I picked well.

 

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David Cameron, much as I loathe him, always struck me as someone who was happily married. Despite their son's death and the stress of being in the public eye they both seemed genuinely happy together. I wonder what the secret is.

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4 hours ago, MattW said:

Bloody lucky there, pal. This is the most recent mgtow videos I have viewed:

I'm happily unmarried. I love the freedom to do almost whatever the f*** I want whenever I want.

Aye I really did, although she is fiercely anti feminist and we are still good friends and always will be. I would go so far as to say we are better as friends.

It became apparent to both of us that divorce is an industry run only for profit. I am not surprised at all at the MGTOW movement, I will be one myself. Does it count if Ima  MGTOW funded by my ex wife ? :)

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I`m on my third marriage. On reflection the first was a good un ( I didnt realise it at the time, as I was too immature), the second turned into the devil incarnate when I wanted out. I have now been married for six years and this is for keeps.I have had more moments of contentment during this marriage than any of the previous ones. I guess one could say I am happliy married.

I think the real question should be to all people is, are you happy in your life. Life has moments of drudgery and banality, along with glorious moments hopefully, or times when one is wishing the moment (s) will never end.

I am married to a Filipina who looks after me in a way that doesnt chip away at my pride, and asks for permission to do many things. Yet I find myself giving more to this woman than any previous "version". She is not soft and can be as hard as nails but in a very subtle way. I have to earn her respect though, and in return I get back respect in bucket loads.

I know many men and women look down upon western men marrying "mail order brides" (although I didnt go down that route to meet her) for lots of negative reasons but there are many of these marriages that are quietly flourishing and contradicting the stereotypes.

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33 minutes ago, GinAndPlatonic said:

I`m on my third marriage. On reflection the first was a good un ( I didnt realise it at the time, as I was too immature), the second turned into the devil incarnate when I wanted out. I have now been married for six years and this is for keeps.I have had more moments of contentment during this marriage than any of the previous ones. I guess one could say I am happliy married.

I think the real question should be to all people is, are you happy in your life. Life has moments of drudgery and banality, along with glorious moments hopefully, or times when one is wishing the moment (s) will never end.

I am married to a Filipina who looks after me in a way that doesnt chip away at my pride, and asks for permission to do many things. Yet I find myself giving more to this woman than any previous "version". She is not soft and can be as hard as nails but in a very subtle way. I have to earn her respect though, and in return I get back respect in bucket loads.

I know many men and women look down upon western men marrying "mail order brides" (although I didnt go down that route to meet her) for lots o fnegative reasons but there are many of these maraiages that are quietly flourishing and contradicting the stereotypes.

From my experience women with traditional values tend to be less mental ? or is that just me? The data would suggest as western women have pursued careers houses and owning crap they have become every more miserable. Filipinas have very strong family values and some I have known despite owning nothing are alwasy more upbeat and happy, it is all about family for them.

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5 minutes ago, Sandwiches33 said:

From my experience women with traditional values tend to be less mental ? or is that just me? The data would suggest as western women have pursued careers houses and owning crap they have become every more miserable. Filipinas have very strong family values and some I have known despite owning nothing are alwasy more upbeat and happy, it is all about family for them.

Indeed their lives revolve around family. In some ways I have relearned what it means to be human since I first met her.

I mean what is life really about, if not relationships & family first.

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15 minutes ago, GinAndPlatonic said:

Indeed their lives revolve around family. In some ways I have relearned what it means to be human since I first met her.

I mean what is life really about, if not relationships & family first.

Yes I recently met some filipino girls and it was very refreshing. They will do everyhting they can to help family and friends yet I would say here we have become very insular.

Dare I say it is related to being dirt poor as my family was more like this many years ago when we were all poor.

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I'm happily married although only been married for last 2.5 years.

It was definitely a good move to marry a woman who has some sense of traditional family values. I have lived with two English women previously both of whom were completely devoid of any such notions.

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I do agree that many men are getting a raw deal in the courts and from women who are not happy and blame men for everything. My second wife nearly drove me nuts and in the end it was me or her....I chose my sanity, and I divorced her..I realised after spending ten years of my life with this woman I had to become more realistic in my dealings with women and tougher with them.....right from the start. I needed to look after myself before any woman.

One of the problems I see in relationships is that men have an inate yearning to feel needed even if they do not recognise or admit this. Men are the providers, the fixers. It is good for our ego to please women and show them we are clever and strong...lots of generalities here I know.

This guy articulates much of what I see in many women & men.

http://playithub.com/watch/Bn-sQWVxPls/teach-a-woman-to-be-accountable-in-5-steps.html

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Not read all posts......but I think some people get the word marriage ie two people tied up legally with each other publicly and....to two people happily involved, trust, committed, faithful, love and care for each other for the rest of their lives, any two people can do that, a private affair of trust, respect and love between two people, neither of them requires the public label of 'married'....what has any legal marriage document got to do with that, marriage so often a public expensive promise that is so often broken.....!!! ;)

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