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SarahBell

Doggy DNA

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[Puts on the ruthless landlord hat on]

Sorry but if I was a ruthless landlord - it's too much leg work, taking samples of DNA, sending it off, contesting it with the tenant because the test says it IS your dog that fouled on the floorboards? But sorry I'm too busy sunning myself in the Caribbean to be flying back to be bothered with stuff like that. There are plenty googlebillions of tenants with no dogs out there. Anyway if you have excess money to fund a pet, maybe I could put up the rents innit.

So there it is, NO PETS.

[Takes off ruthless landlord hat]

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Just now, 200p said:

Puts on the ruthless landlord hat on.


Ignore the landlord hat altogether.

Imagine a world where the bastards who let their dogs shit on the floor and don't clean it up get dealt with. 
 

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^It's like those RSPCA TV programmes, where they follow an inspector into some house where there is a couple living there and they let the dog defecate on the floors, AND DON'T CLEAN IT UP!!!

 

^Every landlords nightmare at the end of a 6 month AST

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It's a truism of the universe that if you go high enough, or low enough, along the class scale you inevitably meet people who let their dogs sh1t all over the house.

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1 hour ago, hotairmail said:

I have to say I thought it was about dog dna being identified in the human genome and theories as to how it got there (bit like Neanderthals and the Welsh ;)).

 

Neanderthals and Homo Errectus are still with us - if you know the skull types you can see enough of them.

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3 hours ago, 200p said:

^It's like those RSPCA TV programmes, where they follow an inspector into some house where there is a couple living there and they let the dog defecate on the floors, AND DON'T CLEAN IT UP!!!

 

^Every landlords nightmare at the end of a 6 month AST

They probably defecate on the floor themselves, too. 

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1 hour ago, SNACR said:

It's a truism of the universe that if you go high enough, or low enough, along the class scale you inevitably meet people who let their dogs sh1t all over the house.

So true. Especially the upper class. That's why they have such big houses. 

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2 hours ago, The Masked Tulip said:

 

Neanderthals and Homo Errectus are still with us - if you know the skull types you can see enough of them.

Phrenologist!:huh:

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I've always admired "Pooper Scooper" by ABBA.:o

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10 hours ago, hotairmail said:

Years ago, we had a similar problem at the office at work. He was known as "the Phantom Crapper".

I've worked in two offices where that happened and Mrs BlueCat can add another to the list. It seems to be pretty common and I would guess it's some kind of ultra-passive aggressive move from a disgruntled staff member.

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On 26/11/2016 at 8:54 PM, TheBlueCat said:

I've worked in two offices where that happened and Mrs BlueCat can add another to the list. It seems to be pretty common and I would guess it's some kind of ultra-passive aggressive move from a disgruntled staff member.

It's not so much passive aggressive as actively aggressive. Its never happened to me but a friend told me of it happening in their office, someone shitting in a sandwich bag and putting it in the bosses drawer. The kicker? Said friend is a senior police officer. Words fail me.

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On 25/11/2016 at 4:52 PM, geezer466 said:

Some councils already doing this I think to id the feral buggers who $hit on the footpath.

Do you mean people or dogs do it? We have had an increase in huge turds on the pavement in last year or so... I often wondered whether dogs or drunks...

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http://boxhouseblog.blogspot.co.uk/2009/08/our-wood-floors-are-ruined-is-it.html

 

Puddles of dog urine so thick and heavy in the blue bedroom that the floor boards are soaked through and lifting. The damaged area covers most of the floor space, and no doubt goes down to the subfloor. The smell is overwhelming. We found a urine soaked mattress beside the dumpster. Our guess is that the illegal tenant had locked the dogs in this room for extended periods with nothing but a mattress on the floor. (This had previously been the bedroom of the tenant that took off.) The mattress trapped the puddles on the floor, causing all the damage.

Poo:

DSC07568.JPG

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