Jump to content
House Price Crash Forum

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

SarahBell

Cybersecurity

Recommended Posts

 

But he warned that there is currently a shortage of cybersecurity experts to manage the increasing problems presented by the integration of tech into our daily lives.

http://www.alphr.com/security/1004684/experts-react-to-governments-19bn-cybersecurity-pledge-uk-not-yet-equipped-to-deal?_mout=1&utm_campaign=alphr_newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter&tpid=236928349678


Can I make a helpful suggestion? 
Stop connecting bloody toasters to the internet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Get with future ladies.

Bossy, theres something blocking the view from your webcam....

Shame the ukgov havee bought loads of chinese comms kit.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Bossybabe said:

...and kettles and fridges, ffs!  WHY???

Anyone here got a connected kitchen appliance???:huh:

The next thing will be a wardrobe connected to the fashion police.  "Warning: Do not leave the house wearing that!"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wierdly i get a popup ad from Newcastle poly , who are running a cyber security MSc for 10k of your hard cash. Parttime, some weekends in London.

Now this sort of stuff is not a million miles from my work. I doubt the taght courses will be much cop- just some une!ployable dork reading a book off the interweb.

Cyber tips:

If you have a computer then dont turn it on.

If you turn it on dont connect it to the interweb.

If you connect to the interweb then dont run windows.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sure you could learn a lot on a cybersecurity course. However I think they may be the MBA type snakeoil of this era.

I actually did an MSc at Newcastle Poly in the 80s Was Optoelectronics. When I had finished there were no jobs in it.

The big difference was that Thatcher's mean Government paid me a grant.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, spyguy said:

Wierdly i get a popup ad from Newcastle poly , who are running a cyber security MSc for 10k of your hard cash. Parttime, some weekends in London.

Now this sort of stuff is not a million miles from my work. I doubt the taght courses will be much cop- just some une!ployable dork reading a book off the interweb.

Cyber tips:

If you have a computer then dont turn it on.

If you turn it on dont connect it to the interweb.

If you connect to the interweb then dont run windows.

We had a well meaning guy but not very computer literate bloke on the Board of one company. We'd had a virus attack that had taken our network out for three days (downadup if anybody remembers that one) and he'd told his mate who was an IT consultant about it.

His mate had convinced him that if we only paid him some wedge then all of our computer security problems would be solved for ever more and he was banging on about this, getting a bit exasperated as to why we wouldn't accept this generous offer whilst the IT manager struggled to remain polite as the implication was that they were both incompetent and cavalier when they were neither.

In the end they had to say that the only totally secure network was one that never connected to anything else, the internet, memory sticks, which wouldn't be particularly useful as a business system.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

We had a well meaning guy but not very computer literate bloke on the Board of one company. We'd had a virus attack that had taken our network out for three days (downadup if anybody remembers that one) and he'd told his mate who was an IT consultant about it.

His mate had convinced him that if we only paid him some wedge then all of our computer security problems would be solved for ever more and he was banging on about this, getting a bit exasperated as to why we wouldn't accept this generous offer whilst the IT manager struggled to remain polite as the implication was that they were both incompetent and cavalier when they were neither.

In the end they had to say that the only totally secure network was one that never connected to anything else, the internet, memory sticks, which wouldn't be particularly useful as a business system.

Let me guess, Windows consultant.

Install a virus checker, bill ~ 1k/day, all done.

Part of Windows enterprise problem is the large number of useless 'consultants' hanging around from the early days who think everything can be fixed by them ringing up the MS sales support and installing whatever product is recommended to them.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, spyguy said:

Let me guess, Windows consultant.

Install a virus checker, bill ~ 1k/day, all done.

Part of Windows enterprise problem is the large number of useless 'consultants' hanging around from the early days who think everything can be fixed by them ringing up the MS sales support and installing whatever product is recommended to them.

 

I think he realised he'd been spun a line when everyone else in the meeting agreed with the IT manager.

Although the IT manager was themselves taken in the next year by employing an expensively dressed bloke who kept telling everybody how much he was saving the company; by ditching decent programmes and installing freeware that didn't work properly. He was eventually sacked.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Nice sometimes to enjoy a few days with real cash in pocket, no swipe cars, real tickets in pocket, no phone or laptop, tablet, no satnav just a map, no internet, no cctv cameras...... a few hours of freedom and peace.....not being followed or tracked by anyone or anything....;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I tried to get a job in government cyber security, but did not have the experience or the right skills. There are various offices sites in the south. IF you are interested take a look at DTSL.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, 200p said:

I tried to get a job in government cyber security, but did not have the experience or the right skills. There are various offices sites in the south. IF you are interested take a look at DTSL.

They are looking for the "moon on a stick" and won't pay enough to relocate to a very expensive area. Almost topical for this site.:blink:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was probably too old, had very little public sector work experience, and can't code.

Although I can embed images in to forums!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, 200p said:

I was probably too old, had very little public sector work experience, and can't code.

Although I can embed images in to forums!

I can see a problem here.:blink: Why don't you complain that you weren't black enough?

Anyway, off on a tangent, as I sometimes do......

The place I works at, is a big Government contractor, and is the whitest place I ever worked due to the requirement of being nominally British, and having at least one British parent. They seem to have sh1t all idea about computer security though!:o

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, SarahBell said:

Can I make a helpful suggestion? 

Stop connecting bloody toasters to the internet.

Amen to that. And some people wonder why I've developed such a contempt for "progress". Aside from my computers (desktop and laptop) I don't own anything that I could possibly see any reason for connecting to the internet. We've got an obsession for making things as high-tech as possible for the sake of it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, Riedquat said:

Amen to that. And some people wonder why I've developed such a contempt for "progress". Aside from my computers (desktop and laptop) I don't own anything that I could possibly see any reason for connecting to the internet. We've got an obsession for making things as high-tech as possible for the sake of it.

My car is connected. It's mildly useful.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, Hail the Tripod said:

My car is connected. It's mildly useful.

Can't think of a reason I'd want my car connected. Well maybe one or two very, very minor ones that don't come close to making it a good idea. Keeping the built-in satnav up to date is all I can think of right now, which isn't terribly significant.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, thecrashingisles said:

The next thing will be a wardrobe connected to the fashion police.  "Warning: Do not leave the house wearing that!"

???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, spyguy said:

Get with future ladies.

Bossy, theres something blocking the view from your webcam....

Shame the ukgov havee bought loads of chinese comms kit.

Sorry, spy guy, that'll be my t1ts. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, 200p said:

I was probably too old, had very little public sector work experience, and can't code.

Although I can embed images in to forums!

You sound ideal for a place I was invited to to go to for an informal 'chat'.

After a 2h hour process I did feel like investing in a fallout shelter with an off grid power supply.

We decided, at the end, that they did not to step up their knowledge of stuff like computers, and a lot of stuff that had happened since 1950.

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, 200p said:

I tried to get a job in government cyber security, but did not have the experience or the right skills.

Sorry to hear that you didn't get the job, but then the skill requirements were very clear: have 7.5 years experience in maintaining Windows 11, 9.7 years experience developing for Oracle Forms v.3.5.beta7, and 8 years relevant experience implementing security solutions for 360 degree Android applications.

Luckily for the government, IBM Global Services had just the person, and they could start next week; they just needed a bit of paper signing, as the guy was working in their Karachi office.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
32 minutes ago, Bossybabe said:

Sorry, spy guy, that'll be my t1ts. 

You actually have wild birds flying around your boudoir..?

Must be a nightmare cleaning all the bird-shit off the bedspread...

 

XYY

 

                                                                                                               

The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage - Danish proverb

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, MrPin said:

I can see a problem here.:blink: Why don't you complain that you weren't black enough?

Anyway, off on a tangent, as I sometimes do......

The place I works at, is a big Government contractor, and is the whitest place I ever worked due to the requirement of being nominally British, and having at least one British parent. They seem to have sh1t all idea about computer security though!:o

It always helps to fill the ethnic monitoring form in putting yourself down as Muslim. It works for the police too. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, The XYY Man said:

You actually have wild birds flying around your boudoir..?

Must be a nightmare cleaning all the bird-shit off the bedspread...

 

XYY

 

                                                                                                               

The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage - Danish proverb

 

 

Perish the thought. I hate birds. It was probably my hound. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I still have not found your avatar bootay.

ive been trolling interweb pron for ages.

Bit hard now. My palm hairs keep getting caught in the keys......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Next General Election   90 members have voted

    1. 1. When do you predict the next general election will be held?


      • 2019
      • 2020
      • 2021
      • 2022

    Please sign in or register to vote in this poll. View topic


×

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.