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How To Be Mediocre And Be Happy With Yourself

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In the quest to find inner zen, this might be a useful read ---- How to be mediocre and be happy with yourself

"Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them."

He'd taken a quote by Shakespeare on greatness and turned it on its head.

The implication was clear: mediocrity is a bad thing, to be avoided. Yet most of us go on to live what by most measures are pretty ordinary lives.

So what's wrong with settling for mediocrity?

....

"When I say I'm mediocre, I am," she says, posing the question in a recent blog, What if I am mediocre and choose to be at peace with that?

"I love to learn but I'm not the most brilliant person. I like to write but that doesn't mean I'm the greatest writer. I'm just kind of plain."...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-37108240

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There is also the slowly dawning realisation that happiness matters more than objective achievement.

When I was a child I wanted to be Prime Minister because this was the top job. As an adult I wouldn't want to do it at all.

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This is the blog post:

http://www.alifeinprogress.ca/?p=1065

What if I all I want is a small, slow, simple life? What if I am most happy in the space of in between. Where calm lives. What if I am mediocre and choose to be at peace with that?

The world is such a noisy place. Loud, haranguing voices lecturing me to hustle, to improve, build, strive, yearn, acquire, compete, and grasp for more. For bigger and better. Sacrifice sleep for productivity. Strive for excellence. Go big or go home. Have a huge impact in the world. Make your life count.

But what if I just don’t have it in me. What if all the striving for excellence leaves me sad, worn out, depleted. Drained of joy. Am I simply not enough?

What if I never really amount to anything when I grow up – beyond mom and sister and wife. But these people in my primary circle of impact know they are loved and that I would choose them again, given the choice. Can this be enough?

What if I never build an orphanage in Africa but send bags of groceries to people here and there and support a couple of kids through sponsorship. What if I just offer the small gifts I have to the world and let that be enough.

What if I don’t want to write a cookbook or build a six figure business or speak before thousands. But I write because I have something to say and I invest in a small community of women I care about and encourage them to love and care for themselves well. Because bigger isn’t always better and the individual matters. She is enough.

What if I just accept this mediocre body of mine that is neither big nor small. Just in between. And I embrace that I have no desire to work for rock hard abs or 18% body fat. And I make peace with it and decide that when I lie on my deathbed I will never regret having just been me. Take me or leave me.

What if I am a mediocre home manager who rarely dusts and mostly maintains order and makes real food but sometimes buys pizza and who is horrified at moments by the utter mess in some areas of her home. Who loves to menu plan and budget but then breaks her own rules and pushes back against rigidity. Who doesn’t care about decorating and fancy things. Whose home is humble but safe.

What if I am not cut out for the frantic pace of this society and cannot even begin to keep up. And see so many others with what appears to be boundless energy and stamina but know that I need tons of solitude and calm, an abundance of rest, and swaths of unscheduled time in order to be healthy. Body, Spirit, Soul healthy. Am I enough?

What if I am too religious for some and not spiritual enough for others. Non-evangelistic. Not bold enough. Yet willing to share in quiet ways, in genuine relationship, my deeply rooted faith. And my doubts and insecurities. This will have to be enough.

And if I have been married 21 years and love my husband more today than yesterday but have never had a fairy tale romance and break the “experts” marriage rules about doing a ton of activities together and having a bunch in common. And we don’t. And we like time apart and time together. Is our marriage good enough?

What if I am a mom who delights in her kids but needs time for herself and sometimes just wants to be first and doesn’t like to play but who hugs and affirms and supports her kids in their passions. A mediocre mom who can never live up to her own expectations of good enough, let alone yours.

What if I embrace my limitations and stop railing against them. Make peace with who I am and what I need and honor your right to do the same. Accept that all I really want is a small, slow, simple life. A mediocre life. A beautiful, quiet, gentle life. I think it is enough.

Krista xo

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What? On the BBC? Isn't that anathema to their whole feminist Agenda?

It's the classic expression of neo-biological sex roles. The males struggle for dominance: the alpha male succeeds (male dominance in top jobs), others fail (male dominance in prison populations, and the crushed individual at large). While females accept their role as ordinary members of the population somewhere below the alpha.

And yes, it comes as one ages, too. The alpha male is a young man's role. The elder's role is different: the old man is no longer a threat to the alpha male, and oldies of both sexes are respected or laughed at on different kinds of occasion.

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A return to mediocrity would be welcome after the last fortnight's parade of unattainable (for most) sporting achievements, 'heroic' role models, one-winner competing and nationalistic jostling for position.

Let's go back to small personal victories, working and living by cooperation, and taking pleasure in the everyday!

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If I were to race Phelps in the 100m freestyle - I would get to the turn and be coming back just as he finished. Now that sounds rather mediocre - but I'm pretty chuffed with that fact !!

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A return to mediocrity would be welcome after the last fortnight's parade of unattainable (for most) sporting achievements, 'heroic' role models, one-winner competing and nationalistic jostling for position.

Let's go back to small personal victories, working and living by cooperation, and taking pleasure in the everyday!

Even the ground zero of government propaganda, the BBC, now finally admits that the London Olympic legacy of widening sports participation was a total failure and it actually fell.

So what you have is the Soviet model of a passive and under-served population (school playing fields sold off, councils removing subsidy from or closing sports and leisure centres) watching a highly-funded and tiny minority win medals.

Now it's nice to see the UK (surely GBR excludes Northern Ireland?) winning medals but if there is no effort to include Joe public in sport on a regular basis then it's a bit hollow.

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A return to mediocrity would be welcome after the last fortnight's parade of unattainable (for most) sporting achievements, 'heroic' role models, one-winner competing and nationalistic jostling for position.

Let's go back to small personal victories, working and living by cooperation, and taking pleasure in the everyday!

Indeed.

Just imagine the outrage if we spent that much on an academic elite while neglecting the vast majority. There's lots of opposition even to the altogether lesser distinction of grammar schools.

One could even contrast all those wannabe comics and artists at Edinburgh.

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Typical middle-class BBC space-filling nonsense - I nearly fell asleep reading it.

Try asking an African picking scraps on a rubbish tip for a living how he feels about being "mediocre".

We're the ******ing Eloi, and we're still not haaaaappppy! Wah!

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The secret of being happy is to be happy.

You also need to decide to be happy, and 'give yourself permission'. ? I'm a happy person. Probably because I don't understand the problem. ?

My mother used to say of me when I was around ten y/o "Stupid, but happy". Took me years to realise I wasn't stupid. 98th percentile IQ, and practical with it.

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The alpha male is a young man's role.

To a point, yes. But what do you think of as old?

Someone like Vladimir Putin is alpha (obviously - there is no way he would be able to be as successful as he has been otherwise) but 63.

Trump is also clearly alpha, but yet 70yrs old.

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To a point, yes. But what do you think of as old?

Someone like Vladimir Putin is alpha (obviously - there is no way he would be able to be as successful as he has been otherwise) but 63.

Trump is also clearly alpha, but yet 70yrs old.

Good points.

These older men derive alpha status not from biological basics - their own physical strength - but from the power structures of modern states. Societies that have grown up and adopted rules to enable larger and denser populations to coexist than would otherwise be possible. Rules that exist for very good reasons (more trade, less war) alter the dynamics of society, and do indeed pave the way for different structures.

The issue is whether societal rules can completely override biological ones. The BBC orthodoxy wants to say yes (always) when it comes to advancing womens causes but no (usually) when it comes to equalising areas where women have the advantage. Society at large appears to say No, at least so long as we have things like separate mens and womens sports, or loos, even if it's becoming suddenly trendy to self-identify your own sex.

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It's nice to see the BBC finally admitting that social media causes feelings of inferiority. I still don't understand the need to use it religiously. In 10 years time the accepted view by the majority will be that Facebook makes you miserable. Lucky for me, I called this back in 2008 when I deleted my account.

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It's nice to see the BBC finally admitting that social media causes feelings of inferiority. I still don't understand the need to use it religiously. In 10 years time the accepted view by the majority will be that Facebook makes you miserable. Lucky for me, I called this back in 2008 when I deleted my account.

It's never deleted !!

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Is it possible to be happy, without being delusional in some way?

If you're genuinely mediocre, then i don't think that it is. Thankfully most people are delusional, particularly about their own abilities.

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I think, epecially on a site like this full of Mavericks, that mediocre is probably not a satisfactory tag. We are full of contradictions and in reality probably excel at some stuff and fail miserably at others. Indeed the more full of contradictions you are then probably the further you are from the norm and mediocrity.

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