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Big AL

Am I Going To Be The First Hpc Divorce?

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It’s a sad old world; I was happily married 9 months ago.

About 3 months ago my wife started being ‘off’ with me and it’s deteriorated since.

She would not tell me what ‘was was up’ – But its not another Man!

She just announced today she wants a divorce.

Why? –

Because all her friends and family ‘and mine apparently!’ have been telling her we are idiots for renting and that we are crazy and are throwing money away. (£750 per month for 4 bed detached in nice new area, )

I said to her, we have made more money this year than we would be staying in our old home (See below) –

She just said its not about money, she does not feel that it is a home to her, she hates it and wants a house that we own! – She cannot stand the constant hassle she gets from friends and her clients at the Beauty salon she owns and runs.

So the threat is, we buy in 2006 (In fact she has already seen the house she wants!) or it’s the end of our 17 year marriage!

My answer: I tried to say: We are so lucky, many of our friends are up to their necks in debt (As we were 9 months ago) and we have no worries and a great life (2 holidays aboard, Sky TV! ‘ full package!’ – every comfort you could wish for and more!) Also how many people look at us in envy the fact that we got £80K for just living in a house for 5 years!

Keep up to date with this thread for daily updates on our situation (Should be better than Corry!)

In order to make the remainder easy to read I will list bullet points of my life story

• Married with 2 fantastic kids 16 and 10

• Sold our last house March 05 and made £80K Profit (in 5 years)

• Moving into rented house (STR)

• Paid off debts / loans etc etc – now completely debt free (Can sleep at night!)

• Invested the remainder and showing 20% returns since then.

• My plans were to keep reading Dr. Bubs posts and ‘keep out’ of the coming storm whilst protecting my family from its wake!

I am not asking for advice as I will have to make some important decisions based on human emotions – this is the dam problem with this Housing situation, its screwing up lives! – There are more important things to worry about in life!

Happy new year to all – Hope it had a better start than mine!

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Commiserations - however, 17 years of marriage down the pan

because all her friends and acquaintances buoght and you didn't?

Seems fairly lame grounds for divorce - many women suffer a lot

worse than that before even thinking about divorce.

Not sure what the solution is - call of bluff..?

(may backfire vey nastily, especialy with kids involved,

but if she is serious, you will soon find out)

Best of luck

ABB

Edited by AgeingBabyBoomer

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bout 3 months ago my wife started being ‘off’ with me and it’s deteriorated since.

She would not tell me what ‘was was up’ – But its not another Man!

She just announced today she wants a divorce.

Why? –

sincerely mate - its another man.

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sincerely mate - its another man.

... with an enormous house. :(:(:(:(

Edited by shakerbaby

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I doubt you would be the first or the last. There might have been some already that we didnt hear about.

It has occured to me that when someone is desperate to buy a house even though it doest seem logical due to being able to rent for much less, that that person is perhaps not seeing the extra cost coming out of their personal bank account. I wonder how many people who would have say £300 less to spend every month would be so keen to buy if they could actually see what is happening.

There has to be a case for some couples keeping separate bank accounts and contributing equally to all household expenses. You want to buy that house? Okay. This is how much less you have to spend on holidays, clothes, perfume, eating out etc.

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fwiw - I can see why she's unhappy - £750 a month is a lot of rent. I know how I felt when we rented - the place just didn't feel like ours - had no interest in investing time or effort into it.

her reasons for wanting to buy are just as valid as yours for not - you'd be a fool to dismiss them out of hand.

17 years and two great kids versus a perceived 'coming storm' - no contest really.

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The full extent of the coming correction will only fully be felt by the few ftb's dumb enough to beleive the hype and mew addicts that have binged it all.As long as you can put off buying then go ahead with the plan and hope that what has happened in the last six months economically to this country continues.People are only just starting to see the full extent of the situation we are in here.Every other week we hear about some company going bankrupt now or its grim numbers of bankruptcies or repossesions on the rise.

This climate is certainly not the same visibly that it was just seven months ago when when labour were fighting their smoke and mirrors election campaign.All they had to deal with was the unexpected blip that was rover.Maybe your wife will change her tune in another six months and start seeing things differently.There is certainly a lot more pessimism now and there are lot more converts to our way of thinking I presume.

Some of us do not have a choice and have to stay out of the market cause we just cannot and will not be able to buy unless there is some sort of return to normal.So in that respect you are quite lucky in that you could return if pushed hard enough.At the end of the day anything you buy that falls in value is only going to be equivalent to what would of happened if you had stayed on the ladder.You might well even miss some of the falls by staying out this long.Its your decision and not something to be taken lightly.........................

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well ive never seen a woman go from a stable (even renting) situation to a freefall.

there is always a suitor waiting in the wings. hes probably very much a turd picking up a married woman,. but ah-well she has to learn the hard way. (no pun intended). i reckon its another bloke. the house ? an easy excuse.

your mission:

is to agree with the divorce like YOU WANT IT, and act like you are not all that bothered. bothered - but NOT ALL THAT bothered. be sure not to lose you mojo and use this as an opportunity to go out with your mates. you must put yourself off he so much you do not fancy here no more. go shag a ginger lass. (one with nice pale skin that goes well with powder blue suspenders ect).

this will rile her curiosity and you can win her back within 3 months.

- then you can toy with her emotions later.

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How did you manage to persuade her to STR in the first place?

It was a little by good fortune in that we had to be out of the old house quickly and I suggested that having been on HPC for 12 months or so (And the fact we got burnt in the 89 - 95 crash) we should 'maybe' rent 'for a while' she took some convincing!

and from what you say - with your lifestyle your 80k will soon be dwindling - I'd start reinvesting in some more BricksandMortar ;) if I were you!

Not at all - we now live within our means - We earn OK!

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It was a little by good fortune in that we had to be out of the old house quickly and I suggested that having been on HPC for 12 months or so (And the fact we got burnt in the 89 - 95 crash) we should 'maybe' rent 'for a while' she took some convincing!

Not at all - we now live within our means - We earn OK!

well she tried it your way - now ...........................

and please don't listen to all this crap about other men (just cos other's got treated bad by their women .....)

Women are nesters and she's not a cuckoo, she wants her own nest!

and if you're living within your means and earning ok - what's your problem - no wonder she's p*ssed! What if your HPC theory comes to nought?

Edited by BricksandMortar

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Guest Charlie The Tramp

Big Al I wish you and your family well and hope everthing turns out Ok.

I have been married 37 years next May and I still don`t understand women. :(

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Big Al I wish you and your family well and hope everthing turns out Ok.

I have been married 37 years next May and I still don`t understand women. :(

I've been married 34 years this April and I've had a handle on you men since day one!

:rolleyes:

Edited by BricksandMortar

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Big Al I wish you and your family well and hope everthing turns out Ok.

I have been married 37 years next May and I still don`t understand women. :(

Thanks Charlie

I will buy you a drink at the Hatchet next time! - we can both discuss the issue over a beer!

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It’s a sad old world; I was happily married 9 months ago.

About 3 months ago my wife started being ‘off’ with me and it’s deteriorated since.

She would not tell me what ‘was was up’ – But its not another Man!

She just announced today she wants a divorce.

Why? –

Was she happy 9 months ago? I disagree with the other who say there HAS to be another man. However, I have my doubts to it being only about buying (owning?) a house. Methinks there is more to the story than either you shared, or know.

Sorry about the breakup.

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Was she happy 9 months ago? I disagree with the other who say there HAS to be another man. However, I have my doubts to it being only about buying (owning?) a house. Methinks there is more to the story than either you shared, or know.

Sorry about the breakup.

i did say man OR woman.

i think i have all the bases covered here.

its defo another man. can you tell me if you have had girl friends that have ever dumped a man - to go without another man. maybe im wrong. but every time ive seen a split there was always a third person fanning the flames. and if the woman is boodylicious -then its even more likley.

has she recently been buying jazzy underwear ?

been argumentative over minor issues ?

working later or more than normal ?

critical of your person type ? i.e. boring, unambitious ect ?

also:

When the routine bites hard

and ambitions are low

And the resentment rides high

but emotions won't grow

And we're changing our ways,

taking different roads

Then love, love will tear us apart again

Why is the bedroom so cold

Turned away on your side?

Is my timing that flawed,

our respect run so dry?

Yet there's still this appeal

That we've kept through our lives

Love, love will tear us apart again

Do you cry out in your sleep

All my failings exposed

Get a taste in my mouth

As desperation takes hold

Is it something so good

Just can't function no more?

When love, love will tear us apart again

Edited by right_freds_dead

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its defo another man. can you tell me if you have had girl friends that have ever dumped a man - to go without another man. maybe im wrong. but every time ive seen a split there was always a third person fanning the flames. and if the woman is boodylicious -then its even more likley.

Oh yeah, some woman do act like that. I even know a dude who was left for another woman.

Just not all of us.

And I really don't want to man Vs woman debate again.

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And I really don't want to man Vs woman debate again.

i was only saying that women are worse than men. thats all i was saying.

no need to get all bent out of shape and menopausal on me.

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i was only saying that women are worse than men. thats all i was saying.

no need to get all bent out of shape and menopausal on me.

I'm not menopausal...I have PMS :D:D:D:D:D:D

Your funny.

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  • 302 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
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