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SarahBell

Celery

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Who doesn't want a vegetable enema? What were they thinking? :blink:

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I think the 'ribbed for extra pleasure' gives it away (if there were any doubt) that it is a spoof.

A nice one though!

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I eat it as a snack dipped in salad cream and white pepper :wub:

Happy St David's day, Miyagi San!

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Happy St David's day, Miyagi San!

Thank you sir, I duly sent Miyagi Jnr off to school wearing a Welsh rugby top!

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The fans sang this at the one and only Premiership football match I've been to:

Celery, celery.

If she don’t cum,

I’ll tickle her bum,

With a lump of celery.

Celery, Celery

My old mum,

said tickle her bum,

with a stick of celery.

Celery, Celery,

my old mum,

said you can make her cum,

with a stick of celery.

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Thank you sir, I duly sent Miyagi Jnr off to school wearing a Welsh rugby top!

Next year you can afford the trousers? :unsure:

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You learnt the words pretty quick.

I'm a quick study! They also sang something about hating yiddos and they made monkey noises when a black player came onto the pitch. That was enough to put me off ever going back.

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I'm a quick study! They also sang something about hating yiddos and they made monkey noises when a black player came onto the pitch. That was enough to put me off ever going back.

It's not called the beautiful game for nothing

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"Doctor, why do you wear a stick of celery on your lapel?"

"Does it offend you?"

"No, I'm just curious."

"Safety precaution. I'm allergic to certain gases in the praxis range of the spectrum."

"How does the celery help?"

"If the gas is present the celery turns purple."

"Then what do you do?"

"I eat the celery. If nothing else, I'm sure it's good for my teeth"

Ironically that was Peter Davison's last adventure as the Doctor. He regenerates at the end of that story, poisoned by something else called spectrox toxaemia.

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"Doctor, why do you wear a stick of celery on your lapel?"

"Does it offend you?"

"No, I'm just curious."

"Safety precaution. I'm allergic to certain gases in the praxis range of the spectrum."

"How does the celery help?"

"If the gas is present the celery turns purple."

"Then what do you do?"

"I eat the celery. If nothing else, I'm sure it's good for my teeth"

Ironically that was Peter Davison's last adventure as the Doctor. He regenerates at the end of that story, poisoned by something else called spectrox toxaemia.

Thanks for that.

Love celery myself. Goes into anything.

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It's a while since we heard from happy renting. I hope he hasn't hurt himself.

Perhaps his pet falcon mistook him for prey with the addition of a celery tail.

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