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Frank Hovis

Men Refusing To Get Married

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Tilt all the divorce laws against the men and surprise surprise they don't want to sign up for marriage any more. Who'd a thunk it?

The high level of state interference in family life was always going to end badly.

Number of single women resorting to IVF TRIPLES in a decade as 'men shun marriage and women put careers before motherhood'
  • There has been a 20% rise of single women using IVF in just one year
  • Single career women may want to conceive 'before its too late', experts say
  • Others argue men are shunning marriage as they fear expensive divorces
  • Single-parent families and IVF is also generally more widely accepted

'There was a story in the news recently about a woman who got a huge divorce settlement.

'And another about a woman suing her husband twelve years after the marriage had ended, now that he's a millionaire.

'There is that feeling from men, worrying that they've built up a good income that they'd end up losing some of it - or a vast majority - should they get married and have children.

'Men are less likely to commit nowadays because of that financial situation and that forces women to take action alone.'

Edit: to be clear I am not blaming women for this state of affairs. I am entirely laying the blame upon the divorce laws.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3193616/Number-single-women-resorting-IVF-TRIPLES-decade-men-shun-marriage-women-careers-motherhood.html

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I call them men who with eyes who can plan more than five minutes into the future.

Remember Idiocracy was a documentary not a comedy film.

EDIT: Mods - please rename this 'Deluded old scrapper birds - part 2'

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It's the children without Fathers I feel sorry for.

No woman can EVER replace a man in that situation. For that reason, I'd be tempted to ban IVF unless the Woman involved is already married or in a long-term male/female relationship.

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I avoided the expense and trauma of divorce, by not geting married in the first place. I was tempted once, but now I am glad I didn't, even though she had more money than I did. :huh:

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It's the children without Fathers I feel sorry for.

No woman can EVER replace a man in that situation. For that reason, I'd be tempted to ban IVF unless the Woman involved is already married or in a long-term male/female relationship.

Then even fewer educated working women will have children.

The state has messed up badly here. Any man with decent money or the prospect thereof would be mad to get married IMHO. Co-habit, partner, all fine but not marry; why take that enormous financial risk?

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I have thought about this a lot........and have come to the conclusion marriage as it stands is out of date.....I fully support people getting married in the eyes of the church or for religious or cultural purposes, but marriage in law is something I can't get my head around.......two people that form a long-term relationship and have children together are treated almost equally now apart from a few financial elements....people can write a will now, people can nominate their partner as a beneficiary to their pension now.......we are all free, we are all individual, nobody owns another person nobody can change another person or force them into a situation where they do not want to be......

It is an agreement between two people and God if you believe.......nothing whatsoever to do with the law IMO, can almost turn around three times and are divorced theses days, goes to show what a farce it all is....so what is the point of the cost of a wedding party and the cost of getting divorced......goes without saying that any children mixed up in ANY broken relationship interests should always be priority. ;)

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Tilt all the divorce laws against the men and surprise surprise they don't want to sign up for marriage any more. Who'd a thunk it?

The high level of state interference in family life was always going to end badly.

Edit: to be clear I am not blaming women for this state of affairs. I am entirely laying the blame upon the divorce laws.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3193616/Number-single-women-resorting-IVF-TRIPLES-decade-men-shun-marriage-women-careers-motherhood.html

So you dont think women have any blame in this state of affairs.....?

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Aren't there moves afoot to put non-married couples on the same footing as married ones when they split up with regards to splitting the assets? Not getting married won't save you.

Not a case of being saved.....these things should be thought about before you enter a relationship......plan ahead......marriage looks meaningless when people have a prenup.......

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Guest eight

Aren't there moves afoot to put non-married couples on the same footing as married ones when they split up with regards to splitting the assets? Not getting married won't save you.

TBH I thought that had already been the situation for some time now.

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Aren't there moves afoot to put non-married couples on the same footing as married ones when they split up with regards to splitting the assets? Not getting married won't save you.

Not sure, I think we already have them don't we? (common law marriage etc).

Hard to get your head around why living with someone for a few years should necessarily entitle them to half of the other persons belongings.

We should have a system like in other countries (Mexico) where you can tick a box on the marriage form to say whether you want to share your assets or not.

Let people choose on their own.

Admittedly, once kids are in the equation it is slightly different. If I split with my wife tomorrow I would still want/expect to pay to cover the cost of raising the kids, that's just being a good mother/father.

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TBH I thought that had already been the situation for some time now.

Correct me if I am wrong....but if one person owns a property and lives unmarried with their long-term partner in the home together that person can not sell that property without the others consent as it is classified as their home......some people don't realise that.

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Aren't there moves afoot to put non-married couples on the same footing as married ones when they split up with regards to splitting the assets?

Would never work.

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Correct me if I am wrong....but if one person owns a property and lives unmarried with their long-term partner in the home together that person can not sell that property without the others consent as it is classified as their home......some people don't realise that.

I presume you can still move out and issue an eviction notice or section 21 or whatever landlords issue?

Provided you give them a sensible amount of time I can't imagine anyone has a right to someone else's property indefinitely.

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Would never work.

Agreed. I have heard of several people who officially do not co-habit because it would mean loss of benefits. All you need is somebody at a different address who is prepared to say that whilst you may sometimes stay at your partner's house you mainly live at the other address.

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I avoided the expense and trauma of divorce, by not geting married in the first place. I was tempted once, but now I am glad I didn't, even though she had more money than I did. :huh:

Probably the subject of a Deluded Old (not really a) Scrapper Birds pt3 thread but I'm currently involved in a tricky 'friendzone' situation with a ladyfriend who I first met years ago when (we were both) coupled up.

Neither of us have been coupled up for a while now and have been seeing each other as chums over that time. She mentioned to me a couple of weeks ago that she'd started 'seeing someone'. At which point I made the unforgivable mistake of expressing some depth of feeling towards her.

The reasons why I hadn't prior to that are a bit convoluted. Cutting a long story short I've been served a large helping of 'you're a dear friend but...' pie with lashings of sprinkles and a portion of 'I don't want to lose you as a friend, maybe you'll get used to it'.

She's off on hols now for a couple of weeks with her little un. After which we'll be getting together and I'll be saying ta ta.

The problem being, I suspect, that we get on like a house on fire in virtually all respects but that in all the years I've known her I've never once treated her like s**t, acted like I'd rather be somewhere else, or anything like that, and it's a bit late to start now.

Just sharing and perfectly aware that I may be inadvertently initiating a Deluded Old Scrapper Blokes thread.

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If someone can walk away just because one party would prefer not to get married, especially post child rearing days several relationships down the line.....sorry they were not worth it anyway.....lucky escape. ;)

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Probably the subject of a Deluded Old (not really a) Scrapper Birds pt3 thread but I'm currently involved in a tricky 'friendzone' situation with a ladyfriend who I first met years ago when (we were both) coupled up.

Neither of us have been coupled up for a while now and have been seeing each other as chums over that time. She mentioned to me a couple of weeks ago that she'd started 'seeing someone'. At which point I made the unforgivable mistake of expressing some depth of feeling towards her.

The reasons why I hadn't prior to that are a bit convoluted. Cutting a long story short I've been served a large helping of 'you're a dear friend but...' pie with lashings of sprinkles and a portion of 'I don't want to lose you as a friend, maybe you'll get used to it'.

You have been a bit of a tit. :huh: Don't worry we've all done it. :blink:

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It's the children without Fathers I feel sorry for.

No woman can EVER replace a man in that situation. For that reason, I'd be tempted to ban IVF unless the Woman involved is already married or in a long-term male/female relationship.

Yes, kids need dads.

It's something they scream about in some communities where fathers are absent.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4906/Children-need-fathers.html

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You have been a bit of a tit. :huh: Don't worry we've all done it. :blink:

It's a bit @rse though is it not Mr.P? Having to pretend you're a bit more of bad boy, Alpha type than you really are?

In the case of the story I told, the woman in question spent years having residual feelings for the knob who knocked her up and walked away when faced with the commitment required, for the second time in his life. He's working on the third now.

Re. the falling marriage rate thing, it's not just blokes not having the stomach for it, there is the small issue of the State acting as a surrogate father. No need for young ladies to spend time with Beta types when they can get impregnated by Alphas and the Betas will carry the tab through taxation.

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You have been a bit of a tit. :huh: Don't worry we've all done it. :blink:

No he hasn't.

To the OP; it's perfectly ok for you to want to go no contact with this woman, and if she actually is your friend (i.e. has some empathy for you and doesn't just use you as a sounding board for her problems) she will understand that you can't spend time around someone who you feel that way about. There's a 99.99% chance that she knew that you fancied her anyway. Unfortunately you can't negotiate attraction, so you're better saying farewell.

If she tries to tell you what a terrible person you are for cutting off contact, this is well worth a watch:

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Yes, kids need dads.

It's something they scream about in some communities where fathers are absent.

Yes kids need both a mum and a dad.....they are both just as important as each other.....the sad thing is when one makes it difficult for the other to see the children regularly with acrimony forcing children to take sides .....but worse than that is when one irresponsible parent walks out of the life of their child.....children can't chose their parents, some kids picked the short straw. ;)

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