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Apparently about half your poo is actually made up from the microbes in your gut. So it is not your dna as such but the 'signature' of your poo. I suggest the best way for your dog not to get caught is for you to defecate on its poo and mix it all up.

Easy solution: take samples from the owners (and all their family members) as well.

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Swabs from dogs' cheeks would be entered into a voluntary database.

Hmm. I can see that working. :rolleyes:

BTW in humans, DNA swabs are taken from mouth cheeks. What cheeks on the dog will they swab?

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You're right. What we need is a comprehensive national poo database. You can't put a price on this crime.

National Dog Turd Library. They could use those little plastic drawers that hang on the wall.

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National Dog Turd Library. They could use those little plastic drawers that hang on the wall.

Will they be allowed to bark in it?

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What's to stop me taking your dogs poo from your garden and then depositing it in the park. The whole story is a load of excrement, it stinks of big brother gone mental.

Frenzied faecal fascists fund fanatical forensic f**ktards!

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Taxidermy is the answer to this "dog poo menace". :huh:

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It occurs to me that DNA testing is an overkill. All that is needed is a record of the sphincter cross-section. Then turds could be reliably matched to corresponding doggy-botties, much in the way the FBI matches bullets to gun rifling.

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Do different breeds do different shaped poos?

I believe that ghost dogs are responsible for the white ones - that's dogs that haven't passed through to the afterlife, not Forest Whittaker but, I could be wrong, I'm not a dog poo expert.

Anyway, what's Gillian Mckeith doing these days?

She always seemed to like looking at jobbies, she'd probably do it for free. She could show the dogs a big table of all the Winalot, and other dog's sick, they've eaten over the past fortnight, to shame them into healthier eating.

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Why does every thread turn into a poo debate?

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