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Domestic Violence - Bbc

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Just saw a 2 minute piece on the news regarding a new 'safe house' being opened in Redcar specifically for over 40's women victims of domestic abuse.

The word 'women' was used about 20 times. It was honestly like there was some sort of brainwashing going on !!

One victim was talking about years of 'coersion and control' by her partner - and feeling like he needed to be in control of everything she did.

Don't know about anyone else - but half the blokes I know suffer this on a daily basis !!

If you look at the stats - its about 20% of claims to the police are from blokes.

I truly believe that in reality - men suffered domestic abuse a lot more than women. Both mentally and physically.

For a women to go to the police if a victim must be a huge thing - however for a man to do the same ? A whole different level.

I just find the whole one sided media view on this pretty disgusting. A few token comments that 'oh and men can also be victims too' is about all the likes of the BBC bother with.

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men end up living on the streets, or in a shelter for the homeless...

women need that extra help.

but all is equal of course.

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I am convinced that much of the female bias in society is actually down to men over 60

I was discussing my divorce with a colleague in that age range yesterday, he showed nothing but concern for my ex. When i pointed out that the benefit systems now sees that she has more cash coming in then we ever had when we lived together he dismissed the whole idea out of hand and seemed to think I was lying to save my guilt

I don't discuss the fact that my ex was a violent nutter generally

Fits in with what Many have said that ironically the bias to women in divorce cases comes from the judges who are often men of this generation who actually think women need caring for more than men I.e. Sexists

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Just saw a 2 minute piece on the news regarding a new 'safe house' being opened in Redcar specifically for over 40's women victims of domestic abuse.

The word 'women' was used about 20 times. It was honestly like there was some sort of brainwashing going on !!

One victim was talking about years of 'coersion and control' by her partner - and feeling like he needed to be in control of everything she did.

Don't know about anyone else - but half the blokes I know suffer this on a daily basis !!

If you look at the stats - its about 20% of claims to the police are from blokes.

I truly believe that in reality - men suffered domestic abuse a lot more than women. Both mentally and physically.

For a women to go to the police if a victim must be a huge thing - however for a man to do the same ? A whole different level.

I just find the whole one sided media view on this pretty disgusting. A few token comments that 'oh and men can also be victims too' is about all the likes of the BBC bother with.

If you're that bothered, set up a Men's refuge.

Thought not.

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http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/jilted-wife-chopped-husbands-*****-4969780

However, Feng is then reported to have sneaked back into her husband's hospital room and cut off his ***** for a second time, this time throwing it out of a window.

A hospital spokesman said: "The first we were aware of what happened was when someone came into the reception area to say a naked man was beating up a woman outside the hospital.

"Staff rushed out to see what was happening and found the patient with blood streaming down his legs hitting the woman.

"He was stopped and the woman was taken in for treatment, and then we discovered she had chopped his ***** off again."

Doctors and police officers combed the area outside but failed to find the man’s missing member. They believed it may have been taken by a stray dog or cat.

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I also heard this on the radio. it's interesting in the context of another segment of the show where a woman was talking about training her husband 'like a dog', by using a clicker every time he did something right. This is funny, apparently. You only have to reverse the sexes to see how unfunny it really is.

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Stefan Molyneux does videos on this sort of stuff. I guess there is a lot of stigma (or at least internalized feelings) towards men who admit to this kind of stuff.

I guess I'm guilty of that...i think men that put up with abusive partners are pathetic...but then I also tend to think women that put up with abusive partners are pathetic too! irks me a lot when a woman is killed by an partner/ex-partner and the family blame the police when more often than not she seems to move back to the abuser believing he's 'changed' or something.

I agree about the media though...Watch a lot of these gamers videos on this yank woman anita sarkeesian. Basically she is to feminism what Gerald Ratner was to quality jewelling...a complete and easily debunk-able fraud, and yet the mainstream media can't get enough of her. Why? If she was offering a fraudulent 'product' instead of a fraudulent insight, she'd be thrown out the studio in seconds.

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I also heard this on the radio. it's interesting in the context of another segment of the show where a woman was talking about training her husband 'like a dog', by using a clicker every time he did something right. This is funny, apparently.

is.

I imagine very few people, regardless of gender, would find that remotely 'funny'.

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So the OP hit a raw nerve then.

Yeah, from the last time a woman chopped off my ****.

But really, the OP always moans about this. If men need refuges then do something about it.

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I imagine very few people, regardless of gender, would find that remotely 'funny'.

The BBC ran a program before, where they got a dog trainer in to teach women how to get their husbands to stop ignoring them. The advice basically boiled down to when he is doing things you like, be appreciative. It was certainly effective.

Is it insulting to modern men that they react similarly to other higher mammals to people actually being nice?

Or is it insulting to modern women that they need to be retrained to be appreciative of others?

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If you're that bothered, set up a Men's refuge.

Thought not.

Man up street discovered that the police have no advice or help for him other than to remove him from the house for his own safety. He was the lodger.

I made enquiries and there was a hostel for gay blokes somewhere.

In the end she died and he was made properly homeless.

She'd killed her first husband and done 18 months for it. Fixed him to the wardrobe door with a kitchen knife.

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Yeah, from the last time a woman chopped off my ****.

But really, the OP always moans about this. If men need refuges then do something about it.

That would take a great deal of money and time, something most people don't have. Of what money is available, nearly all goes to women's help groups.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/uks-biggest-male-rape-charity-survivors-uk-has-state-funding-slashed-to-zero-despite-120-rise-in-men-reporting-sexual-violence-and-seeking-help-10274441.html

UK's biggest male rape charity Survivors UK has state funding slashed to zero despite 120% rise in men reporting sexual violence and seeking help

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It is the children that suffer the most from domestic violence......the children need to be protected or else history can repeat itself and can also cause debilitating mental health issues for future generations......creating future high costs in health care, social and economical costs. ;)

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The BBC ran a program before, where they got a dog trainer in to teach women how to get their husbands to stop ignoring them. The advice basically boiled down to when he is doing things you like, be appreciative. It was certainly effective.

Is it insulting to modern men that they react similarly to other higher mammals to people actually being nice?

Or is it insulting to modern women that they need to be retrained to be appreciative of others?

Search me, but I don't think 'positive reinforcement' as they call it, comes naturally to many. I first came across it when potty training my elder - the idea of completely ignoring accidents but heaping praise on desired behaviour. Many people's instinct is to sigh and moan at the 'wrong' behaviour. I found the same when trying to 'potty train' our dog, who hadn't read the books and didn't understand that if I put her out in the garden for 20 minutes after eating she was supposed to pooh out there. Instead she would race around for 20 minutes and then come back in and pooh right in front of the TV.

However IMO 'training' a man by clicking is an entirely different thing from just being appreciative.

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It is the children that suffer the most from domestic violence......the children need to be protected or else history can repeat itself and can also cause debilitating mental health issues for future generations......creating future high costs in health care, social and economical costs. ;)

buy cotton wool shares....its for the children dontchaknow...so was the war in Afghanistan

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I am convinced that much of the female bias in society is actually down to men over 60

I was discussing my divorce with a colleague in that age range yesterday, he showed nothing but concern for my ex. When i pointed out that the benefit systems now sees that she has more cash coming in then we ever had when we lived together he dismissed the whole idea out of hand and seemed to think I was lying to save my guilt

I don't discuss the fact that my ex was a violent nutter generally

Fits in with what Many have said that ironically the bias to women in divorce cases comes from the judges who are often men of this generation who actually think women need caring for more than men I.e. Sexists

Not just men over 60. *Everybody* generally associates more positive attributes to women compared to men.

It's an acknowledged psychological bias known as:

The “women are wonderful” effect

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E2%80%9CWomen_are_wonderful%E2%80%9D_effect

Re. domestic violence, I believe research indicates that at least 40% of violence is initiated by women, that violent relationships are usually reciprocal and that such women typically cycle from one violent relationship to another.

Erin Pizzey, pioneer of Women's Refuges eventually realised this, became disaffected, and wrote a book "Prone to Violence", for which she has been excommunicated and attacked by the Feminist movement.

It's very easy for women to garner sympathy by condemning former partners as "controlling" etc. but what nobody usually thinks to question (particularly after multiple instances) is whether the women concerned are *specifically selecting* dominant/ controlling partners, and/or doing what it takes to make them that way.

I would have thought the popular success of "50 shades" should have opened peoples eyes by now to this inconvenient aspect of female sexuality.

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I also heard this on the radio. it's interesting in the context of another segment of the show where a woman was talking about training her husband 'like a dog', by using a clicker every time he did something right. This is funny, apparently. You only have to reverse the sexes to see how unfunny it really is.

Exactly. You see it everywhere these days. It can be quite subtle though so most won't really notice it.

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If you're that bothered, set up a Men's refuge.

Thought not.

That's not the point and you know it !!

Its nothing to do with the refuge - but everything to do with the media's / authorities attitudes to it.

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I imagine very few people, regardless of gender, would find that remotely 'funny'.

TV is full of such examples. One such is an online bingo advert - where the 'joke' is you want rid if him to play bingo and chat online to your fellow bingo burds - they send a van around - tie your man up - gag him and chuck him in the back of a van with all the other helpless blokes.

Reverse the situation = 20000 complaints.

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That's not the point and you know it !!

Its nothing to do with the refuge - but everything to do with the media's / authorities attitudes to it.

Go work in the media and change it.

Stop paying for and paying attention to the BBC.

Edit: are you seriously saying that most of the blokes you know are victims of domestic abuse?

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Exactly. You see it everywhere these days. It can be quite subtle though so most won't really notice it.

Its not often I take offense, buy I was on the verge of being offended at the lady caller likening her man to a dog and everyone laughing about it. At the risk of being a stuck record if you reverse it and have a man claiming he trained his wife 'like a dog' you've got some serious complaints on your hands.

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