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I had a wasp sting once that made me go weak at the knees and affected my breathing. For 20 minutes or so I did wonder whether it was going to end up with a 999 call.

Weever fish and sting rays in UK waters can be really nasty. I got bit on the bridge of my nose once whilst sleeping and I had a huge boil-like sore there for a few months. It was not the worst pain but it was a constant pain that I was very aware of.

Box jellyfish is supposed to be the worst.

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Got a small wood splinter in my right index finger once throwing some pallets about at work.

Hurt like crazy for a few hours then I forgot about it.

About 6 Months later the pain returned and the splinter appeared outside of the other side of my finger. Was able to tease it out with a chisel.

In those 6 Months it travelled right the way through.

I keep it in a little silver box now..

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I was attacked by a swarm of wasps when I was 13. I got 36 stings...including one on my ball bag.

Like being on fire.

You have my sympathy....

I know a chap was stripped, shaved and had ralgex sprayed on his ball bag, anus and bell end some years ago in the Army. Was some sort of initiation test.

The chap was unable to parade (work) for three days and had to report to the medical officer.

The powers to be were looking to charge someone with assault. Lucky I had nothing to do with it but the chap kept quiet.....

The smell of calamine lotion lurked through the billet room for weeks afterwards.

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Wow. I knew there was a reason why I didn't want to join the Army. Fighting 'ragheads' would be fine, but having your own lot spraying ralgex on your anus I wouldn't be able to take.

It was an unusual intake. Mostly new chaps would do the dance of the flaming arseholes in the naffi as initiation and be done with it.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dance+of+the+flaming+arseholes

An amusing (for the onlookers) waddle between two arbitrary points while bent over with your pants around your ankles and a lit rolled up piece of newspaper wedged up your ****.

Commonly performed by both the military and football clubs, it's an experience that both onlookers and participants will never forget.

Here's how it goes....

You light a rolled up tube of newspaper and stick it between your buttocks while bent over with your pants around your ankles. Then you have to shuffle from the start line to the finish line without dropping the "Torch".

If you drop the torch you're up shit creek and will suffer a penalty ranging from having to start over to getting doused with beer before having to start over again.

Typically it's like a right of baptism that everyone in a team or group will participate in to both gain acceptance and strengthen ties by the age old addage of shared absurdity....

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You have my sympathy....

I know a chap was stripped, shaved and had ralgex sprayed on his ball bag, anus and bell end some years ago in the Army. Was some sort of initiation test.

The chap was unable to parade (work) for three days and had to report to the medical officer.

The powers to be were looking to charge someone with assault. Lucky I had nothing to do with it but the chap kept quiet.....

The smell of calamine lotion lurked through the billet room for weeks afterwards.

Luckily for him he wasn't trying to enter the Speznatz.

Who knows what would have happened to him ?

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Chop a hot chilli (I mostly use nagas these days).

Then chop a good onion, so you'll rub your eyes as reflex action.

There's pain in a good cause ;)

Pah, that's only 2 million Scovilles. I've got some capsaicin (the hot stuff in chili, for those who don't know) cream which is 16 million Scovilles (it's a painkiller!), try accidentally getting that in your eye!

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You have my sympathy....

I know a chap was stripped, shaved and had ralgex sprayed on his ball bag, anus and bell end some years ago in the Army. Was some sort of initiation test.

The chap was unable to parade (work) for three days and had to report to the medical officer.

The powers to be were looking to charge someone with assault. Lucky I had nothing to do with it but the chap kept quiet.....

The smell of calamine lotion lurked through the billet room for weeks afterwards.

Good friend of mine fell asleep on his stag do and had vindaloo smeared in the same areas. It was only a week before the wedding and they almost had to cancel. It ended up being seriously nasty.

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I had a trapped nerve in my lower back due to a muscular imbalance. I would pass out from the pain and find myself on the floor. Never known anything like it.

Dental abscesses are pretty bad in an unrelenting debilitating kind of way

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Dental abscess.

I once got a dry socket after a tooth extraction due to a dental abscess. Agonising, worse that the abscess. The dentist packed the socket with stuff which helped a bit until it settled down.

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I once got a dry socket after a tooth extraction due to a dental abscess. Agonising, worse that the abscess. The dentist packed the socket with stuff which helped a bit until it settled down.

I had an abscess that started to hurt on a Friday night. The next day I had to go on a long train journey so I couldn't get any treatment until about 9 o'clock at night in a London hospital. The painkillers/antibiotics finally put a stop to the pain about 4am, by which time I'd been awake for about 44 hours, and for at least 30 of them I felt as if someone was having a go at my jawbone with a red-hot poker. After that experience I began to understand why some people might want to undergo voluntary euthanasia in the right circumstances.

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Yes, dental pain. Dry socket/infection following an extraction is a corker. Even the combined efforts of Ibuprofen, paracetamol and marijuana can't quell it completely.

And - scalding/burning yourself, and stubbing your toe.

Those have an interesting dynamic in that when you know you have done it, you know that the pain is coming, a bit like watching a 30 foot tidal wave coming toward you and having a few seconds notice.

Then it comes at you like a tsunami.

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