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Marshmellow

Should I Write A Letter To A Girl I Just Broke Up With

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I just broke up with a girl I was seeing for about 2 months

Its the closest thing I had to a relationship

Telling her I didnt want to continue was the hardest thing Ive ever had to do. Im finding it really hard and crying etc.

She is really nice. I would probably be ashamed to say to someone I broke up with her.

I know it was only 2months or whatever, and its far from my only experience with women but still.

Im 25 shes 27.

I feel like I want to speak to her or write a letter or something but also that I should probably just try to forget about it

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Write it to make yourself feel better bit do not send it. It will either give her hope or make her feel worse.

Move on now. No contact.

This....you properly did her a big favour, doing it now rather than later.

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I stopped basically because she doesnt speak English fluently and something that I have found living abroad is that I find it really tiring speaking English

Im also moving to another country in a few weeks for about 4 months so I thought it would be pointless continuing anyway. She will also move to America for a few months at the start of next year.

I dont think I would write a letter that would give her hope

But i find it really hard to deal with and I hope she is OK

When I looked into her eyes as she realised what I was about to tell her was the worst moment of my life

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I stopped basically because she doesnt speak English fluently and something that I have found living abroad is that I find it really tiring speaking English

Im also moving to another country in a few weeks for about 4 months so I thought it would be pointless continuing anyway. She will also move to America for a few months at the start of next year.

I dont think I would write a letter that would give her hope

But i find it really hard to deal with and I hope she is OK

When I looked into her eyes as she realised what I was about to tell her was the worst moment of my life

Move on, mate. Long distance relationships are very hard to make work - even if you have been together longer. Not impossible, of course, but you've made the decision for you both.

Gather a few friends/family around you. Grieve - for it is a real loss, but move on.

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Indeed, writing (unless in reply to something from her) would look like cat-and-mouse.

I can think of two occasions in my life when I've been the one to end a relationship. First one I'm a bit ashamed of: found myself getting tired of it and treating her gradually worse until it obviously wasn't working (though perhaps that's the best way if you subscribe to the code of the Woosters). Second one I was definitely innocent: as soon as she had me in her clutches she transformed from nice to a cartoon-caricature-worthy manipulative bullying henpecker.

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Indeed, writing (unless in reply to something from her) would look like cat-and-mouse.

I can think of two occasions in my life when I've been the one to end a relationship. First one I'm a bit ashamed of: found myself getting tired of it and treating her gradually worse until it obviously wasn't working (though perhaps that's the best way if you subscribe to the code of the Woosters). Second one I was definitely innocent: as soon as she had me in her clutches she transformed from nice to a cartoon-caricature-worthy manipulative bullying henpecker.

I think we all have dated her - thank goodness that she is the only one though. Shame that every bloke has to date her at some point though.

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Yes she was probably upset. Yes she will cry. In a few weeks she will be on the look out again. Women are strong enough.

While you will still be suffering guilt and remorse. That`s the way it is. Men are more sensitive than women. How else do you think men often come off worse financially after a long term relationship. We are too dumb to see all this until it s often way to late

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Yes she was probably upset. Yes she will cry. In a few weeks she will be on the look out again. Women are strong enough.

While you will still be suffering guilt and remorse. That`s the way it is. Men are more sensitive than women. How else do you think men often come off worse financially after a long term relationship. We are too dumb to see all this until it s often way to late

In other words, she probably is already shagging some other guy.

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In other words, she probably is already shagging some other guy.

That's a very insensitive thing to say - and presumptuous (how do you know she stopped shagging the other guy in the first place?).

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That's a very insensitive thing to say - and presumptuous (how do you know she stopped shagging the other guy in the first place?).

:lol:

The other guy. The last guy. The next guy. Same thing. The lesson as always - don't put the p*ssy on a pedestral.

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Yes she was probably upset. Yes she will cry. In a few weeks she will be on the look out again. Women are strong enough.

While you will still be suffering guilt and remorse. That`s the way it is. Men are more sensitive than women....

I think women tend to be more "delusional" and in order to enter into relationships, they have to convince themselves that they are totally in love and their partner is the best thing in the world. So they suffer more in the short term, but then just move on to a new reality. Men often seem to have longer lasting feelings.

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Why did you spilt up with her? You're miserable, she's miserable. Long distance may be hard but would it be harder than what you're feeling now? And if it doesn't work at least you've tried. I lived in Dubai when I met my husband who lived in NI and that was long before all the communication technology we have now. It can work, the odds are against it, but it does work sometimes (if you want it to).

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I think women tend to be more "delusional" and in order to enter into relationships, they have to convince themselves that they are totally in love and their partner is the best thing in the world. So they suffer more in the short term, but then just move on to a new reality. Men often seem to have longer lasting feelings.

That makes a lot of sense.! Men think in straight lines anyway. Women have shorter attention spans. Just you try and make sense of the dialogue coming from a gaggle of women...its all over the show...I stopped trying to understand the point/destination of my wife`s words ages ago....there doesn`t have to be I know, so I just let her talk, I grunt, then try and regain my train of thought.

ps...If I try to follow her....it hurts too much.

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