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The Hell Of Living With The Ex You've Begun To Hate: Soaring Property Prices Are Preventing Warring Couple From Moving On


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HOLA441

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2606405/The-hell-living-ex-youve-begun-HATE-Soaring-property-prices-preventing-warring-couple-moving-on.html

Nilufer, 38, still has to live with ex-boyfriend Adam, 33, in their London flat

Their relationship ended months ago but neither can afford to move out

She said the situation is unbearable

It's making them both miserable, angry and resentful

Last night, I was in the kitchen, chopping vegetables for my supper, when I heard the key turn in the front door lock. My stomach lurched. It was him - my ex-boyfriend, Adam. I felt trapped.

I faltered between the choices available to me: I could abandon dinner, flee to my room, then escape the minute I heard him step into the shower. Or I could slam the kitchen door shut and ignore him.

The third option - by far the most painful - was to paint on a saccharine smile and greet him cordially.

In the end, I confess, I fled. I just couldn't face him. Another evening ruined, another night forced to feel like a stranger in my own home.

It's a farce played out every evening. The atmosphere is so toxic and strained, it seems to seep into the very walls of the South-West London flat we still share - despite the fact our relationship ended months ago.

The situation is so unbearable that it is leaving both of us miserable, angry and resentful.

...

And, even though our flat has doubled in value, neither of us, as single buyers, could afford to buy anywhere nearly as nice. And, even though it is hell for us to be around each other, neither wants to move into a squalid flat-share or dingy rental while we decide what to do.

After all, I am 38, he's 33 and we're both professionals. We need a certain standard of comfort.

It's a big commitment to move and it seems property prices is creating a stronger bond than marriage that people can't escape!

But still you'd rather have standards that live somewhere as a single.

Edited by interestrateripoff
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HOLA444

http://www.dailymail...-moving-on.html

It's a big commitment to move and it seems property prices is creating a stronger bond than marriage that people can't escape!

But still you'd rather have standards that live somewhere as a single.

I could be wrong but didn't we have this headline in, oh, let me see......2007 !!!

I know a young lad that bought a 1 bed flat in London with his girlfriend, she dumped him and 6 months later he was on the sofa and she was being banked ( by a banker ) in the bed room next door. They remained close friends as they had one thing in common.....they were both ****ed by bankers.

Edited by TheCountOfNowhere
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HOLA445

During the 2008 stall in the market I remember talking to an estate agent who said when everything goes south the only sellers are due to deaths and divorces.

BTL now gives another option on that - and a lot of property that would have been a distressed sale is now being let. The last-but-one house we rented was an ex-divorce rental.

One interesting dynamic to all of this, and it was a reason he said that house prices didn't drop more in 08/09 is that some of the parties in these divorces and deaths do not want to sell but they want it on market to show a lawyer they are trying, so they mark price up to a silly value.

The house we rented was marked up 150K above typical value at the time - and eventually sold at listed price - to a couple of pensioners who rented out their existing place rather than sell it ...

The next house we rented was owned by 2 pensioners who had moved to Canada, they owned 2 family sized UK properties, both of which have been on market for over 6 years now and still not sold ... I made an unreasonably high offer on the one we lived in but they weren't selling for less than it was worth. They want top-end rents but also expect you to let people come trudging round to view the property at 2 days notice ...

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HOLA446
And, even though our flat has doubled in value, neither of us, as single buyers, could afford to buy anywhere nearly as nice.

Stupid set of priorities, but it does emphasise the even greater stupidity of current prices. Perhaps if the flat doubled in value again they'd be better off? No - that's worse. Okay, let's triple the value... still no joy. In fact, and I might be mistaken, it would appear that lower prices might be what you want. Shame you're now in so much debt you'd probably vote to maintain high prices even whilst it kills your future. If this is a 'ladder', then it's failed every health and safety check going.

STR would seem to be the sensible option for them, but that's seemed the sensible option for many years, and has presumably burnt a lot of fingers (quite a few on here, I think?).

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HOLA448

During the 2008 stall in the market I

Thats the funniest thing i've read in years on here.

I think you mean....COLLAPSE.

Please refer to this graph for reference.

homepage.png

The housing market is quite clearly falling the collapse of every other bubble peak. To think otherwise is delusional, to buy into the recovery in price is insane.

Governments can try and interfere but reality will prevail

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HOLA449

Pure unadulterated greed.

I hope they're ******ing miserable.

+1.

Also they've made their decisions.

Society isn't here to pick up pieces and provide nice homes, fresh mortgages, loads of equity for post-split divorcees.

You've already made your decisions and lived your life. Felt like saying that to someone recently who was complaining about big-mortgage, but would still take crash, having bought because wanted to provide stability for his kids post-divorce. Great, you have a new big mortgage on a new house post-split. Your choice.

Give those getting married/married for first time, and renting, waiting a value a chance. Before all the woe is me talk after your failures and hanging on to equity and unprepared to downsize/rent. Greedy.

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HOLA4410

+1.

Also they've made their decisions.

Society isn't here to pick up pieces and provide nice homes, fresh mortgages, loads of equity for post-split divorcees.

You've already made your decisions and lived your life. Felt like saying that to someone recently who was complaining about big-mortgage, but would still take crash, having bought because wanted to provide stability for his kids post-divorce. Great, you have a new big mortgage on a new house post-split. Your choice.

Give those getting married/married for first time, and renting, waiting a value a chance. Before all the woe is me talk after your failures and hanging on to equity and unprepared to downsize/rent. Greedy.

I totally agree. I seems the UK has become a country where if you "win" you tell everyone and if you "lose" you blame everyone ( except yourself ) and see who you can try and recover your losses from.

Why would anyone want to stay here or think this is a country where your children should stay.

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what's funny about this situation, is, it appears the flat has doubled in value?.

whats sad, is that so has the escape route.

As more and more leverage is applied to this, and any market, the more the escape routes will cost.

Dog sick, and cant afford the insurance?...well, the treatment will be reasonable cost, wont it?...no...insurance pays the now quadrupled going rate?

want to go to uni on your own accord?...you cant pay for it with a bar job like you used to.

buy a car for cash?...forget it when a dealer can sell the thing for 4 times the amount to 5 others on the PCP.

Financialisation destroys lives, society and ultimately the whole schebang.

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HOLA4414

London property only goes up so they should never sell? Unfortunately buying out the other party becomee more and more expensive.

No I've been there in that situation but in positive equity. I know some in same situation but negative equity. Not good.

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HOLA4415

Thats the funniest thing i've read in years on here.

I think you mean....COLLAPSE.

Please refer to this graph for reference.

homepage.png

The housing market is quite clearly falling the collapse of every other bubble peak. To think otherwise is delusional, to buy into the recovery in price is insane.

Governments can try and interfere but reality will prevail

I must be deluded as the prices in Hampshire and Dorset were falling slightly from 2007 levels but are now most certainly back to around that level, asking prices are often higher. No doubt in your mind that means i have a vested interest.

To deny that the government, BoE and banks have reinflated the bubble is to deny reality.

If a crash had happened this website would cease to exist, from what i gather numbers reading it are up.

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HOLA4418

I totally agree. I seems the UK has become a country where if you "win" you tell everyone and if you "lose" you blame everyone ( except yourself ) and see who you can try and recover your losses from.

Why would anyone want to stay here or think this is a country where your children should stay.

I am a loser in the UK and i blame the government and NIMBY's, ive gone to work and saved yet all i can afford is a 2 bed terrace in a dodgy part of town.

I can move abroad tomorrow companies in Norway, Oz, NZ, Canada would pay for me to move right away and id be on good money, but i cant speak Norwegian and have no will to learn, NZ, OZ and Canada all have vast property bubbles. In most of Asia you cant own land and you're just a guest as is the case in the Middle East.

Ive lived abroad on and off for the last 15 years and the reality is very much different than the dream especially if you have kids.

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Move out of London then.

Our leaders have ensured that most of the jobs for professionals are inside the M25.

I'm not sure why people are so against these people. Simply because they bought? Don't we all want a nice home at a reasonable price? Shouldn't we all be expecting a 'certain level of comfort' in return for our hard work? I know I do - this is why the fifteen-year property bubble has been such a disaster.

This couple could have been me, had I been less informed and more relaxed about debt.

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HOLA4422

Pure unadulterated greed.

I hope they're ******ing miserable.

Estimated as many as 3.6 million in such a situation, forced to live with ex. This is another trigger. It won't be that many in quite such circumstances, but would like to see more come to market, before the rush. Drought of supply.

Doubled in value from 2008. To think this place was full of people wailing with loads of excuses for recent buyers in 2008. "They just wanted a home / media media media at fault / didn't realise what debt was / banks gave them too big mortgage cause they didn't understand it." And doubled in value since, making their situation (when they refuse to rent/move area/have lower housing standard) worse with HPI.... but actually better if they sold imo, and rented. Unless you believe in forever HPI as we've had lately with mega y-o-y rises.

And, even though our flat has doubled in value, neither of us, as single buyers, could afford to buy anywhere nearly as nice.

It was I, who suggested we move in together three years after we met and I who suggested buying somewhere together and found the two-bedroom flat we bought for £247,000 in 2008.

And it was I who put down most of the deposit - £37,000 compared to his £5,000 - although we each own 50 per cent of the property. I also bought most of the furniture.

I didn't mind paying the lion's share because we were both so excited to have our own place.

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HOLA4423
This couple could have been me, had I been less informed and more relaxed about debt.

Aww diddums. We should have carried you on our shoulders as we do with all the other victim buyers.

Outbid someone else by loads for a property - but forgiven because of ignorance.

Is your position today as good as theirs, the money they could release if they sold as current values?

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HOLA4424

Regardless of the state of prices, I shouldn't think it has ever often been possible for ordinary couples splitting up, to be able to buy 'as nice' a property each, as the one they bought together.

If they are really that miserable, you'd think anything would be better than living together in bitter hatred.

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HOLA4425

Regardless of the state of prices, I shouldn't think it has ever often been possible for ordinary couples splitting up, to be able to buy 'as nice' a property each, as the one they bought together.

If they are really that miserable, you'd think anything would be better than living together in bitter hatred.

she probably enjoys being hateful...how many husbands feel they are always in the wrong?

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