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little fish

Death Of A Pet & Grief?

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On Friday my 10 year old dog was hit by a car. Yesterday the pain relief drip was changed to a lethal mix and she passed almost instantly. I have always had animals and of course they have died and I have missed them.

This time I am slightly overwhelmed by the grief I feel. Until recently this was a dog who worked with me. The work was with children,many of whom would be viewed as the most vulnerable in society. If I couldn't get through to, or communicate with,or build any bonds with the child, I brought her with me. I told her play or pet depending on the child and she did the rest. Sometimes (often) I was at a loss as to what to do in situations, I gave her no commands and just went with her instincts. Incredibly, she never got it wrong.

Any body else experience real grief after the death of a pet? Any body have any insight into how to deal with this? It is not just me, but my family too. We are shell shocked and it feels like a member of our family has died.

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On Friday my 10 year old dog was hit by a car. Yesterday the pain relief drip was changed to a lethal mix and she passed almost instantly. I have always had animals and of course they have died and I have missed them.

This time I am slightly overwhelmed by the grief I feel. Until recently this was a dog who worked with me. The work was with children,many of whom would be viewed as the most vulnerable in society. If I couldn't get through to, or communicate with,or build any bonds with the child, I brought her with me. I told her play or pet depending on the child and she did the rest. Sometimes (often) I was at a loss as to what to do in situations, I gave her no commands and just went with her instincts. Incredibly, she never got it wrong.

Any body else experience real grief after the death of a pet? Any body have any insight into how to deal with this? It is not just me, but my family too. We are shell shocked and it feels like a member of our family has died.

Time. A long, long time.

Best of luck mate.

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Cats, mice, and a hamster all died, I was upset but soon got over it. My last pet that died was a 19yo cat, I had known him half my life. I found myself crying when I was on my own for weeks. I think it was the length of time I had been used to that friendly, needy, soft, dependent cat being in my life. Not had one since, it would feel disloyal.

You'd be odd not to be upset by losing a pet like that.

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A member of your family has died, what you are feeling sounds entirely reasonable and in fact anything less would be strange.

I can't offer any advice but I can say your dog sounds incredible, and because dogs are shaped by their families and their environments that must mean you, your family and your work must be incredible too. And for that you should be enormously proud of the 10 years life she had. I bet she loved every second of it.

It'll get better. :) Good luck.

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On Friday my 10 year old dog was hit by a car. Yesterday the pain relief drip was changed to a lethal mix and she passed almost instantly. I have always had animals and of course they have died and I have missed them.

This time I am slightly overwhelmed by the grief I feel. Until recently this was a dog who worked with me. The work was with children,many of whom would be viewed as the most vulnerable in society. If I couldn't get through to, or communicate with,or build any bonds with the child, I brought her with me. I told her play or pet depending on the child and she did the rest. Sometimes (often) I was at a loss as to what to do in situations, I gave her no commands and just went with her instincts. Incredibly, she never got it wrong.

Any body else experience real grief after the death of a pet? Any body have any insight into how to deal with this? It is not just me, but my family too. We are shell shocked and it feels like a member of our family has died.

Loved pets are family members and their loss can hit people just as much as losing a human loved one. I am sorry for your loss. Try to focus on the good, happy memories of your dog. Think about all the good times she gave you and others. Think about all the good times you and your family gave her.

There is no harm in crying or feeling the loss.

She was injured and in pain. You would not want her to suffer. Focus on the good memories.

You may frind yourselves going through the 5 stages of grief in the coming weeks. Perhaps reading up on them might help you.

http://www.pet-loss-matters.com/stages-of-grief.html

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Cats, mice, and a hamster all died, I was upset but soon got over it. My last pet that died was a 19yo cat, I had known him half my life. I found myself crying when I was on my own for weeks. I think it was the length of time I had been used to that friendly, needy, soft, dependent cat being in my life. Not had one since, it would feel disloyal.

You'd be odd not to be upset by losing a pet like that.

I had a dog who lived to be 19. Never had a dog since as I feel it would be being disloyal.

I cried my eyes out when he died.

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I don't have any animals myself! They are like "family" though! I take pictures of my friend's dogs doing amusing things! :blink:

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Any body else experience real grief after the death of a pet? Any body have any insight into how to deal with this? It is not just me, but my family too. We are shell shocked and it feels like a member of our family has died.

No but then all of my pets have died well old and decrepit when its long been obvious that they would have been better off being put to sleep.

My sister in law's dog ran off and got run over. She was utterly distraught for a very long time.

Its the same as with a family member. An unexpected death is an incredible wrench. But dont worry, its right and natural that we outlive our pets. Grieve and rejoice that you gave that animal the best life you could.

Wees sterk en vol moed.

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Thanks everybody. I can't multi quote everybody but thank you. Some helpful words there.

I miss her wee feet clacking across the floor boards. I got up after dinner for our regular walk before I remembered that I have no wee chum to walk with. Can't remember the last time I went for a walk and she wasn't with me. I didn't go out for a walk but I think I probably should.

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Thanks everybody. I can't multi quote everybody but thank you. Some helpful words there.

I miss her wee feet clacking across the floor boards. I got up after dinner for our regular walk before I remembered that I have no wee chum to walk with. Can't remember the last time I went for a walk and she wasn't with me. I didn't go out for a walk but I think I probably should.

My condolences.

Paradoxically, if we didn't feel this way about animals, we wouldn't be human.

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I think there's a big difference between a pet dying of old age and one dying suddenly. A pet struggling in it's older years being put down is hard but very predictable and normal. But when a pet is suddenly lost it's that much worse I think. So a pet being knocked down is going to shock you IMO.

My family had two collies, one was 17 and one was 5. The 17yr old had to be put down because she no longer walk or function. It was tough but to be expected. A few months later the 5yr old became ill and died within a week. It was totally unexpected. The death of the 5yr old was very very depressing. She was a fantastic dog and to die so young just seemed wrong. I was so down afterwards I think it ruined my whole year really.

Anyway, time does make these things easier for sure. We're hardly immortal ourselves, so we're all going the same way in the end. If the pet had a good life that is all that matters.

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Very sorry to hear about your loss. Your feelings are completely natural; your dog was a sentient being, a friend, who you appear to have spend inordinate amounts of time with. The only way ot get over this is time...and lots of it. As others have said, the deaths of pets (and people) before their time are always more upsetting than those whose lives have come to a natural end.

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Cat had a tumour on her nose. She had lost weight and was frail, unable to jump up on to furniture. We made the decision to not bring her home from the vets.That was about 2 years ago.

Was very upset.

Recently had another cat put down after a long illness. Very sad.

Only one cat left now. She's my baby cat. I will be heartbroken when she goes.

Losing a pet is really hard. They are members of your family. They may be a bigger part of your life than humans too. Dogs especially. A dog is always pleased to see you arrive home.

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For million of people in this country alone their pet is their most important friend and relative. We live in an increasingly lonely and isolated society. For millions of us our pets offer us the unconditional love that we once hoped to get from a spouse or partner.

Grieving is a natural and normal and healthy human emotional. It shows that you are a human who has empathy. This is important.

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"Don`t breed or buy while cats and dogs die" (from my sig)

It just makes things 10% easier when they do eventually die.

I picked up our cat in a car park last year. I have and will have no regrets...just a little sadness.

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Losing a pet is really hard. They are members of your family. They may be a bigger part of your life than humans too. Dogs especially. A dog is always pleased to see you arrive home.

I don't think so! :huh:

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I've grown up with dogs who have been treated like members of the family and have cried at their graves when they died. However, with all due respect to the OP, the feelings are not really comparable with those involved in the death of an actual member of the family, such as a spouse (in my case) or child.

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I've grown up with dogs who have been treated like members of the family and have cried at their graves when they died. However, with all due respect to the OP, the feelings are not really comparable with those involved in the death of an actual member of the family, such as a spouse (in my case) or child.

I feel for your situation snowflux, it must be incredibly hard for you and I genuinely hope you have found some acceptance or calmness in your life. I did not, in any way mean to belittle any loss you or anybody else may be experiencing.

I have lost several immediate family members including a child, a very long time ago. No it is not like that. That level of pain is unbearable to this day. And I don't have that feeling that life has lost all it's meaning.

I am most certainly grieving though, as explained to me in the early hours of this morning by a long term friend - I seem to have transferred much of the grieving that I didn't do years ago onto this death. We are such complex engines, so determined to keep coping at any cost, to carry on, to appear to be strong, that we may end up prolonging the pain and damaging ourselves in the process.

I hope you have found strength, have many happy memories and that each day leaves you a little less raw, less painful. And thank you, also, for making me think about my situation from a different stance - the correct one.

.

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I had to have my cat put to sleep 5 weeks ago and I'm still bursting into tears about it.

We had her 6 years, she came with our previous rental house when the next door neighbours moved out 4 weeks after we moved in. She spent so much time with me, it was always my side of the bed she slept on during the day, she'd come down with me and wait whilst I put the washing out and chase me back up the garden when I'd finished, she was just the loveliest companion and I've found the loss rather overwhelming.

I'd previously had cats and a dog who was with me for 16 years but I didn't feel anywhere near as bad as I have this time.

Some just seem to effect you more than others.

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I am most certainly grieving though, as explained to me in the early hours of this morning by a long term friend - I seem to have transferred much of the grieving that I didn't do years ago onto this death. We are such complex engines, so determined to keep coping at any cost, to carry on, to appear to be strong, that we may end up prolonging the pain and damaging ourselves in the process.

Here you have hit the nail on the head I think, I was going to ask if you had had other losses in the past which might explain the strength of this reaction. I love dogs, but still, they remain dogs to me, I'd swallow the grief and get another quite soon, you'll think me hard perhaps. Family members are another matter.

Take your time and you'll be fine.

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Here you have hit the nail on the head I think, I was going to ask if you had had other losses in the past which might explain the strength of this reaction. I love dogs, but still, they remain dogs to me, I'd swallow the grief and get another quite soon, you'll think me hard perhaps. Family members are another matter.

Take your time and you'll be fine.

Very astute swissy_fit . I will be fine, knowing what it is that you are dealing with helps enormously.

ta

<_<

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Ours always were.

Cats are indifferent most of the time.

No! I disagree! Cats are quite clever! I had my GF's cat dancing to David Bowie! I don't think the music mattered!

Pretty much I had 15 inches of little lady! She was standing up! I held my hand on her head and she was purring like an engine! And dancing! :( l

GF was amazed! How the fick did you that? Well she doesn't l fuggin like you! :blink:

! :o

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No! I disagree! Cats are quite clever! I had my GF's cat dancing to David Bowie! I don't think the music mattered!

Pretty much I had 15 inches of little lady! She was standing up! I held my hand on her head and she was purring like an engine! And dancing! :( l

GF was amazed! How the fick did you that? Well she doesn't l fuggin like you! :blink:

! :o

I did mean to you returning home..

You can be away a week and they won't care *As long as someone has been feeding them of course.

Kitty can play fetch. :)

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