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10 Rules For Managing Your Ding A Ling

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http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/aug/07/10-rules-managing-peni5-sexting-wine-toaster

Link won't work as I've had to change the s to a 5 so it will need editing back.

1) Do not involve your peni5 in sexting

3) Do not stick your peni5 into household objects

8) Do not try to pierce your own peni5

Some top tips I feel, now I know what to avoid.

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' ere you go Linky

Given it is in the Guardian, that is quite funny, particularly the outgrage from the CiF whitterati

Indeed so, eg. Below.

As male, can I give you ten vaguely misogynistic and thoroughly tedious tips on how to manage your vagina? Then could I have it published in a 'inter/national broadsheet? Thought not.

[...]

The outrage is not from the article, it's from the ridiculous double standard involved. Do you think if the Guardian published an article, written by a man, instructing women on what not to do with their vagina, even in a comparable 'humorous' tone, that it would not receive an extremely hostile response? Do you think they'd even ever publish such an article?

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Indeed so, eg. Below.

As male, can I give you ten vaguely misogynistic and thoroughly tedious tips on how to manage your vagina? Then could I have it published in a 'inter/national broadsheet? Thought not.

[...]

The outrage is not from the article, it's from the ridiculous double standard involved. Do you think if the Guardian published an article, written by a man, instructing women on what not to do with their vagina, even in a comparable 'humorous' tone, that it would not receive an extremely hostile response? Do you think they'd even ever publish such an article?

Does it matter, they'll never get sport.

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What a disgusting article; particularly the suggestion that a significant percentage of the male population need to be reminded not to rape. It's not the first time I've read such a sentiment either.

Misandry is not only acceptable but fashionable these days it would seem.

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What a disgusting article; particularly the suggestion that a significant percentage of the male population need to be reminded not to rape. It's not the first time I've read such a sentiment either.

Misandry is not only acceptable but fashionable these days it would seem.

Its getting to ridiculous levels. There is a pish but rather amusing show from the US called the millionaire matchmaker. Its pretty self explanatory.

The burd that does it is straight and pretty fiesty. I saw it yesterday and it was their first all gay 'mixer'. They basically go through a load of guys who want set up with a millionaire (their client) and decide who may match up and so can come to the mixer - where their client chooses their favourites to go on a date with. Anyway .. .

She sits there and gets EVERY bloke to take off their shirt so she can have a look at the goods and decide if they are up to scratch or not.

Can you even imagine if it was a straight bloke doing similar to a group of lesbians :o

He would honestly probably be arrested.

Its not just in the UK where this sad state of affairs is in full swing. Its clearly in lots of other places too.

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This pointless blog lurches thickly from fatuous to offensive to starkly homophobic. I can't quite believe that point seven made it across the editor's desk. Nor the stuff about rape.

If I bought the guardian (or in fact any newspaper) this would make me reconsider. But I don't, because it's sh1t.

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Guest eight

Its getting to ridiculous levels. There is a pish but rather amusing show from the US called the millionaire matchmaker. Its pretty self explanatory.

Ah yes, the Millionaire Matchmaker. Right up there with Choccywoccydoodah, Dog the Bounty Hunter and Real Housewives of Orange County in terms of programmes whose titles I have frequently scanned past on the EPG without ever feeling the slightest inclination to watch.

Actually, that's not strictly true. The first time I saw it I misread the title as The Millionaire Watchmaker. That might be quite interesting, I thought.... Then I realised my mistake and decided to give it a miss.

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Guest eight

Has anybody else seen those Thomas Cook ads? The ones that appear to have been written by the creative team behind Carry On Abroad? The only conclusion I can come to is that James Nesbitt must really be on his uppers.

I also love the way they feel it necessary to remind you that they're ATOL protected. If that's supposed to reassure you about the state of the business I can assure them that, as far as I'm concerned, the fact they feel the need to point it out has exactly the opposite effect.

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Has anybody else seen those Thomas Cook ads? The ones that appear to have been written by the creative team behind Carry On Abroad? The only conclusion I can come to is that James Nesbitt must really be on his uppers.

I also love the way they feel it necessary to remind you that they're ATOL protected. If that's supposed to reassure you about the state of the business I can assure them that, as far as I'm concerned, the fact they feel the need to point it out has exactly the opposite effect.

Very strange ads that show various people on a package holiday having their holiday ruined by the sort of obnoxious ***** that put me off package holidays in the first place.

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There's been a few examples of the Guardian adopting the Mail's approach to click bait recently but this one of the most blatantly transparent.

I consider myself to be a bit of a lefty and I suppose the Guardian would have been my natural home at one time. But this, and a lot of the rest of its recent output, is just humourlessly vile.

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What a disgusting article; particularly the suggestion that a significant percentage of the male population need to be reminded not to rape. It's not the first time I've read such a sentiment either.

Misandry is not only acceptable but fashionable these days it would seem.

Well there have always been women with these strange attitudes! Probably says a lot about their choice of previous partners, and I can remember some of those women! :blink:

Now,( in my younger day, of course !) , I occasionally brought home an enthusiastic lady for a "coffee", after the pub or club. Sometimes the lady did not look so enthusiastic in the fluorescent glare of the kitchen lights! Or maybe I wasn't so good looking in the light at 01:00, either! Either way I just used to order the lady a cab home, and I paid for it too! Cos I'm a gent

I had never even thought about being a rapist, and I think most blokes haven't! :blink:

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Jesus the mods on there love censoring, most comments have been moderated.

I thought the telegraph was a bit OTT with moderation, but that takes the cake

You must be a potty-mouth Mr Maus! :lol::blink:

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There's been a few examples of the Guardian adopting the Mail's approach to click bait recently but this one of the most blatantly transparent.

I consider myself to be a bit of a lefty and I suppose the Guardian would have been my natural home at one time. But this, and a lot of the rest of its recent output, is just humourlessly vile.

The 'woman loving' Grauniad was as only too happy to grass up Sarah Tisdall to the authorities all those years ago

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Tisdall

Under its trendy lefty cover it is fundamentally a mouthpiece for the establishment

http://guardianwarpropaganda.wordpress.com/

It is the paper that likes to pretend it is the friend of radicals while all the time it is selling them out to the authorities.

You will find more truth in the Sunday Sport

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The 'woman loving' Grauniad was as only too happy to grass up Sarah Tisdall to the authorities all those years ago

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarah_Tisdall

Under its trendy lefty cover it is fundamentally a mouthpiece for the establishment

http://guardianwarpropaganda.wordpress.com/

It is the paper that likes to pretend it is the friend of radicals while all the time it is selling them out to the authorities.

You will find more truth in the Sunday Sport

The "Grauniad" is no longer the newspaper it once was! :blink:

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Ah yes, the Millionaire Matchmaker. Right up there with Choccywoccydoodah, Dog the Bounty Hunter and Real Housewives of Orange County in terms of programmes whose titles I have frequently scanned past on the EPG without ever feeling the slightest inclination to watch.

I once had the misfortune to be in a family member's house where the TV is on 24/7, and was exposed to an episode of "Dog The Bounty Hunter."

I can promise you that no matter how truly awful you imagine this shite to be, it is ten times worse than you ever dared to think it would be.

I don't know how far a human jaw can actually drop, but watch 5 minutes of this putrid, rancid cack and yours will achieve a new personal-best...!

XYY

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I once had the misfortune to be in a family member's house where the TV is on 24/7, and was exposed to an episode of "Dog The Bounty Hunter."

I can promise you that no matter how truly awful you imagine this shite to be, it is ten times worse than you ever dared to think it would be.

I don't know how far a human jaw can actually drop, but watch 5 minutes of this putrid, rancid cack and yours will achieve a new personal-best...!

XYY

He must be a hen-pecked bloke! Have you seen his wife? :o

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He must be a hen-pecked bloke! Have you seen his wife? :o

Aye, and judging by the size of her, Dog's skill at hunting Bounties is more than matched by her ability to locate Mars Bars...

XYY

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