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At last, due to public demand, I’ve been given my own area.

This section is designed for the more intelligent as a place to discuss what’s really going on in the housing market without all those stupid comments from the bears trying to get a reaction.

I’ll like to start by sharing a bit of research I’ve recently been doing.

I’ve taken data from the more popular indices, and done a Fourier transform to find the composite wave patterns. The resulting twiddle factors I found produced this simple formula.

t – C/x = L + p

Where L (landlord being wealthy) was a constant and t (tenants) tended towards depression and self loathing.

Using this formula I can accurately predict that house prices will go up forever.

For those doubting this, I also used this method to accurately predict the rise and fall of David Hasselhoff.

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"t – C/x = L + p" ?!

I say Grayson! We have a troll who knows jacques scheete about calculus! Fetch the shotguns, class is about to start!

Edited by Gundog

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I say Grayson! We have a troll who knows jacques scheete about calculus! Fetch the shotguns, class is about to start!

Thank you, he was quite the troll. If truth be known, Jacque and I actually studied at Cambridge together. There was a fierce rivalry between us, but I must admit he was the real star when it came to calculus. Sadly, he never achieved his potential. While I of course went on to become Lucasian Professor, his career highlight was a couple of appearances on Countdown. To this day he still blames it on his French accent.

Anyway, back to the topic. Apologies, but I don’t think I will have time to start posting tutorials. If I do though, you’d be better off bringing a pencil and some paper rather than a shotgun.

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Thank you, he was quite the troll. If truth be known, Jacque and I actually studied at Cambridge together. There was a fierce rivalry between us, but I must admit he was the real star when it came to calculus. Sadly, he never achieved his potential. While I of course went on to become Lucasian Professor, his career highlight was a couple of appearances on Countdown. To this day he still blames it on his French accent.

Anyway, back to the topic. Apologies, but I don’t think I will have time to start posting tutorials. If I do though, you’d be better off bringing a pencil and some paper rather than a shotgun.

I don't know who you are, but I'm LMAO. :D

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You are thinking of Jacque Merde who was at Cambridge. Jacgue Scheete was the son of Johann Scheiss and Pisa Shitta, a German and Italian couple. He was adopted by the Scheetes of Belgium, distant cousins of Johanns uncle, Bullen. Jacques claim to fame was solving the mystery of why a sheet of A1 paper when folded in half would become A2 size and so on till it became infinitessimally small. So you have to know your Scheete in this life

The shotguns are required in case Timothy Winters is in class and there is an Arithmatic Bird that he wants to shoot.

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Jacques claim to fame was solving the mystery of why a sheet of A1 paper when folded in half would become A2 size and so on till it became infinitessimally small. So you have to know your Scheete in this life

I believe this overthrew previous beliefs, maintained largely as a result of experiments performed by Dr John Noakes and Prof Valerie Singleton, that a sheet could only be folded seven times.

For safety's sake I should point out that folding more than 299 792 458 times should be discouraged as this results in matter densities approximating "singularities", or in common parlance, Black Holes. This is problematic, firstly because light from the paper will no longer have sufficient speed to escape the paper's gravitational pull, thus rendering it invisible to the naked eye and making further folding extremely difficult. There was another problem, but I can't recall what that was.

Edited by Sledgehead

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I believe this overthrew previous beliefs, maintained largely as a result of experiments performed by Dr John Noakes and Prof Valerie Singleton, that a sheet could only be folded seven times.

For safety's sake I should point out that folding more than 299 792 458 times should be discouraged as this results in matter densities approximating "singularities", or in common parlance, Black Holes. This is problematic, firstly because light from the paper will no longer have sufficient speed to escape the paper's gravitational pull, thus rendering it invisible to the naked eye and making further folding extremely difficult. There was another problem, but I can't recall what that was.

The other problem was that after folding so many times, you would have lost too much blood due to paper cuts and so would no longer be able to carry on.

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The other problem was that after folding so many times, you would have lost too much blood due to paper cuts and so would no longer be able to carry on.

I'm not entirely convinced that was the other problem.

I seem to recall a similar procedure that resulted in splitting the atom, but critcally, I believe that revolved around continuosly bisecting said sheet of paper by a process of tearing, as opposed to folding. I seem to recall the eventual conclusion of the experiment was marked by the occurence of a large bang and attendant warmth. Ongoing research has however yet to establish a connection between these experiments and Jacque Scheete.

Edited by Sledgehead

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There was no connection. It was Noah Scheete who decided to tear the paper, unfortunately he was careless with his choice of what to do with his discarded paper. He started the experiment in Sweden apparently and his leftover paper wound up in a certain Alfred Nobels factory where it had the effect of acting like blue touchpaper. Once he factory went up in a loud bang and smoke, someone was heard to ask "did someone bring paper into the dynamite preparation area?" to which one answered" yeah Noah Scheete"

To which this day no member of the Scheete family ever worked thee again.

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ACHTUNG! TEUFELWARNUNG!

Two trolls are inbound to this locstat. Watch out for Rapid Descent and zuzuspetals. Growl is selling tickets to the callousseum now.

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  • 302 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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