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Personal Game Changer


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Well nothing weds you to the state like a child.

The thing is, if you are a good worker ant and reasonably healthy, for all people say the state is omnipotent and overbearing you won't actually have much contact with them. Only when you have a child are you thrust, perhaps for the first time, into face to face dealings with the NHS and all the other various state jobsworths that are along for the ride. The general intrusiveness and patronising can come as a bit of a shock if you've never experienced it before. Others of course are seasoned pros and can take it like water off a duck's back.

Can't say that has been my experience*. Apart from a bit of post-natel weights and measures, that seemed about it... oh, and one life-saving operation. That was pretty obtrusive...

* although don't get me started on schools...

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Can't say that has been my experience*. Apart from a bit of post-natel weights and measures, that seemed about it... oh, and one life-saving operation. That was pretty obtrusive...

* although don't get me started on schools...

We've just reached school, hence why I'm probably a bit arsey.

Forgot to say too: congrats to the OP!

People say to make the most of the early days, but I've actually found every stage that my daughter has reached to be better than the one before. I know it's not really allowed to say this, but very little babies are a bit dull. I much prefer it now I can interact with her more.

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We've just reached school, hence why I'm probably a bit arsey.

Forgot to say too: congrats to the OP!

People say to make the most of the early days, but I've actually found every stage that my daughter has reached to be better than the one before. I know it's not really allowed to say this, but very little babies are a bit dull. I much prefer it now I can interact with her more.

PARENTS DO NOT INTERACT WITH THEIR DAUGHTERS. THATS SEXIST. THEY ARE ALL CHILDREN. ALL THE SAME....THE WORD HER IS OUTLAWED AS PI

ALERT ALERT.

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Congratulations. I would just add, try and get as much sleep as possible when you can, and don't commit to any decisions made in the next 3 months - in my experience your head is full of cotton wool dealing with all the new things and emotions.

Agree.

The birth of the first-born is a very emotional.

Don't make any major decisions for a while and then if you feel the same way about leaving the UK the so be it.

Congrats to the OP - you'll be dreamimg of dirty nappies in a few weeks :)

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Congrats from me too!

The freebies are a bit odd, but at least Nestle aren't giving you free milk powder to dilute your cholera with.

We had #1 in hospital and #2 at home. Neither experience was perfect (home birth was better though) but then neither is everything I get paid to do. Have had mostly positive experiences with the NHS (and the Swedish system for a few years). I would stay away from the US like the plague, that's for sure.

Most important of all, both kids are thankfully healthy and a joy to watch grow up. Wishing you all the best with whatever/wherever you choose!

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Congratulations Count! It is a wonderful time. A couple of tips if I may:

- make sure the mum is OK too over the next few weeks and months

- put the child benefit payments into accounts/investments specifically for the kids for when they're older (if you can afford to). It soon adds up and should make for a decent deposit on a house contribution to their university education or a start in life when they turn 18.

Above all, make sure you're around and don't work all hours without seeing your kids - it's amazing to see this little person develop over the years and also take on some of your own characteristics and values.

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Congrats from me too!

The freebies are a bit odd, but at least Nestle aren't giving you free milk powder to dilute your cholera with.

We had #1 in hospital and #2 at home. Neither experience was perfect (home birth was better though) but then neither is everything I get paid to do. Have had mostly positive experiences with the NHS (and the Swedish system for a few years). I would stay away from the US like the plague, that's for sure.

Most important of all, both kids are thankfully healthy and a joy to watch grow up. Wishing you all the best with whatever/wherever you choose!

A child is the only thing you can make that will always be yours, whatever anybody else says or does.

You will always be a daddy or a mummy.

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Congratulations! :)

It really is a game changer! I don't know that I had the best experiance of the NHS when giving birth (especially the mid wife who said we could discuss pain relief after my contraction, but would leave the room every time I was about to finish a contraction... I was thankful that her shift finished, and a different midwife did the actual delivery - of course, by which time any pain relief wasn't an option!)

For the time being, sleep when they sleep if you can (and make sure Mummy does too...) the laundry and cleaning etc will keep. You can always ask a visiting adorer to do something/bring a meal for you.

I recommend having a pack of Chocolate Hob Nobs by the bed - I (and Mr W&S) were always hungry waking up at 3/4 am.

Wait for a bit before you start making arrangements to follow through on your current plans. You may find that other priorities take over, and that the grass isn't that much greener elsewhere.

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Awww you softies.... am 8 months updiffed and your comments have had me welling up.

Many congrats to the OP. :)

Slightly concerned about the advice about not making any major decisions over the first few months given we're selling our place (currently with the solicitors concluding missives etc) and will be moving into rented in January... when Junior is err likely to be 2 months old. I appreciate we're not doing this the sane way.

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Congrats to all three of you!

I have two (now teenagers) and have loved (almost) every minute of it. Although I'll agree with the poster upthread who said that actual babies are pretty dull things, really. Fortunately, my wife couldn't get enough of 'em at that age!

I was a bit of a hands-off father during the early stages; didn't go to any scans or "classes" or anything so didn't get to see any over-intrusive NHS. They were very flexible when I rang up while my wife was in labour and said "she's just changed her mind - she wants to have it at home instead - can you send a midwife round?"

Neither child has darkened the door of a state school or nursery and I think the authorities have forgotten about them now.

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Congratulations on your healthy new baby.

It is very easy to criticize everything about the UK, however my experiences are very different.

We have 2 great kids, NHS were excellent with the births.

The local primary school is outstanding, I couldn't be happier with the progress the children are making.

Loads of after school / outside school sports / hobbies are available free, or at a reasonable cost.

The local council gym / swimming pool is absolutely first class.

Had surgery on the NHS 3 years ago, and I must say the surgeon was excellent.

I have looked at emigration quite a bit, and my conclusion was that while the children are growing up the UK is the right place for us.

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Awww you softies.... am 8 months updiffed and your comments have had me welling up.

Many congrats to the OP. :)

Slightly concerned about the advice about not making any major decisions over the first few months given we're selling our place (currently with the solicitors concluding missives etc) and will be moving into rented in January... when Junior is err likely to be 2 months old. I appreciate we're not doing this the sane way.

As one of those that mentioned it (our small one will turn 2 next week, and Mrs Lennon is due again end of Jan/early Feb) - you are certainly not doing it the straightforward / sane way, but that's ok! What I would gently suggest from our experiance (usual caveat everyone different, make your own decisions etc.) is that you prepare as much as possible for the move etc. before the little one arrives - not neccessarily in terms of doing practical things, but having plans and knowing what you will be doing so that when it comes to it you can be slightly automaton like about following the plan without having to expend precious energy/time thinking about it / having discussions and having to make decisions that you could have made previously. That's meant to be gentle helpful advice not criticism by the way - and above all Enjoy it as much as possible, and it doesn't last forever...

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Many congratulations! Do enjoy your baby as much as poss - although sleep will probably be your chief treat in life for the next few years - but it is such a precious time when they're little and everything is new and wonderful to them - even things we don't even think about, like a rabbit in the park, a plane in the sky, or a policeman on a horse. You see everything new, through their eyes.

I know it's such a hideous cliche but they do grow up so fast - one minute you're all excited because they've just taken their first steps - the next, you've turned into Mum&Dad taxi service and they're raiding your drinks!

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Many congratulations! Do enjoy your baby as much as poss - although sleep will probably be your chief treat in life for the next few years - but it is such a precious time when they're little and everything is new and wonderful to them - even things we don't even think about, like a rabbit in the park, a plane in the sky, or a policeman on a horse. You see everything new, through their eyes.

This is the most unexpected thing for me. The naivety and the excitement they have for the world is infectious and in my case is an antidote to the cynicism that filled me from 30 onwards.

To the OP, Congratulations, and yes it does change your outlook/priorities. In many ways, I think of kids as a ******** filter. They allow you to see what's important in life - which is all too easy to lose sight of.

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