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KickThemInThePant

P*ss On Me

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I have just begun to wonder about the expression "wouldn't p*ss on you, even if you were on fire".

If p*ssing on someone who is on fire is the sign of being a good samaritan, then this Sunday I intend to walk into my local church during service, dowse myself in lighter fluid and set fire to myself. Watersports are great fun but can be expensive. Rather than having to pay a prostitute £40 to wee on you, why not follow my example and have a full congregation wee on you for free!!

Think on, you know it makes sense! ;)

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I have just begun to wonder about the expression "wouldn't p*ss on you, even if you were on fire".

If p*ssing on someone who is on fire is the sign of being a good samaritan, then this Sunday I intend to walk into my local church during service, dowse myself in lighter fluid and set fire to myself. Watersports are great fun but can be expensive. Rather than having to pay a prostitute £40 to wee on you, why not follow my example and have a full congregation wee on you for free!!

Think on, you know it makes sense! ;)

Best wait about 10 minutes after communion. All the more for you to enjoy. What will the vicker say?

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Obviously this would never happen as people would realise that p!ssing on you might aggrevate the flames, like pouring water on a fat fire.

I would hope that any theologically sound, God-fearing vicar would throw himself on top of you, thereby smothering the flames with his cassock and stole.

I would then expect that he would follow this up with a witty and apposite sermon on the dangers of being "neither hot not cold", or perhaps the Pentacost story.

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I have just begun to wonder about the expression "wouldn't p*ss on you, even if you were on fire".

If p*ssing on someone who is on fire is the sign of being a good samaritan, then this Sunday I intend to walk into my local church during service, dowse myself in lighter fluid and set fire to myself. Watersports are great fun but can be expensive. Rather than having to pay a prostitute £40 to wee on you, why not follow my example and have a full congregation wee on you for free!!

Think on, you know it makes sense! ;)

You aren't an MP are you ???? :huh:

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My best guess is that it has been taken out of context and maybe even shortend from its original incarnation.

Would p*ss on you even if you were on fire says to me ..

Even though i don't want this,im getting rid of it because its of no use to me what so ever, infact if i keep it then it will cause me harm so i must get rid of it. Your on fire and i wont even use that which i want to be rid of so much to put you out because it would benifit you.

Its a sort of "i wont do a damn thing to benifit you and i will go out of my way for you to not benifit from me" . Thats my take on it anyways

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  • 301 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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