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I think companies are dropping the phsychometric tests. I just got a new job with a v large company and didn't have it. Always knew they were sloblocks. They are a starting point for a conversation and not a test to pigeon hole people.

I took a personality test and failed.

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Taking a cue from some of the more serious comments offered, how about something along the lines of.......

"An answer to this section, though legitimately asked, is respectfully withheld as it is the only section that is subjective and not factual in nature. Any answer submitted would relate to the personality of the applicant only. Efficient shortlisting should prioritise on matters of core technical competence to perform the advertised position - and the desirability (or lack of) of an applicants personality and personal opinions to be determined by selectors in person at interview."

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can you possibly even imagine reading through this drivil day after day, year after year. after a couple of years of this crap surely you would be a mental case yourself. So ive a theory that after a couple of years its the new guy in the hr department thats gotta do it, while the rest so peeved off with it all just sit around waiting on the new guy to work their way through it all. while 5 mins a day is spent signing a couple of forms in between games of world or warcraft or something. You would surely go mad otherwise.

Edited by homeless

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Douglas Adams had the right idea - send all the accountants and personnel managers to far off planet Golgafrincham.

Haven't read it for a long time, but didn't the list include estate agents?

Also, weren't they sent from another planet to earth, where they then wiped out neanderthal man leading to our present day human species? :D

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snip

2) Refuse to work for any company who would insert such an idiotic question.

ah, you wont work for any government agency then.

Diversity is POLICY, and it is enforced with battallions of degree educated marketing managers spouting how this diversity is of huge benefit to all, and if you dont comply, even as a supplier, you are OUT.

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Taking a cue from some of the more serious comments offered, how about something along the lines of.......

"An answer to this section, though legitimately asked, is respectfully withheld as it is the only section that is subjective and not factual in nature. Any answer submitted would relate to the personality of the applicant only. Efficient shortlisting should prioritise on matters of core technical competence to perform the advertised position - and the desirability (or lack of) of an applicants personality and personal opinions to be determined by selectors in person at interview."

no, its policy...answer it, conform with it, or forget it.

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I could show this by stating that I have paid prostitiues from all different creeds and colours. Equality A +

Dear Mr CCC,

As it seems you have only favoured female prostitutes with your business our analysts beleive you are obviously homophobic..... :lol:

Edited by madpenguin

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Dear Mr CCC,

As it seems you have only favoured female prostitutes with your business our analysts confirm you are obviously homophobic..... :lol:

I think the 2 weeks he had in Thailand last year may have disproved this accusation.

Either wittingly or not.......

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I think the 2 weeks he had in Thailand last year may have disproved this accusation.

Either wittingly or not.......

A little local knowledge from someone living in Amsterdam

Red Light = Female

Red + Blue light = Not Female

I have had a few local bar staff regale me with stories of people who found out the hard way :D

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A little local knowledge from someone living in Amsterdam

Red Light = Female

Red + Blue light = Not Female

I have had a few local bar staff regale me with stories of people who found out the hard way :D

:rolleyes:

No doubt the Monochromacy Association of Great Britain's annual outing to the Dutch Capital of 'Culture' provides a few

such tales.

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Dear Mr CCC,

As it seems you have only favoured female prostitutes with your business our analysts beleive you are obviously homophobic..... :lol:

Ah thankyou - I will remember that next time to ensure my equality is up to speed.

I think the 2 weeks he had in Thailand last year may have disproved this accusation.

Either wittingly or not.......

It wasn't last year !!

Although one of my pals has done a ladyboy in Thailand before.

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A little local knowledge from someone living in Amsterdam

Red Light = Female

Red + Blue light = Not Female

I have had a few local bar staff regale me with stories of people who found out the hard way :D

Was that the hard, then suddenly soft way?

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:rolleyes:

No doubt the Monochromacy Association of Great Britain's annual outing to the Dutch Capital of 'Culture' provides a few

such tales.

Actually looking at the state most Brit stag night/pub crawl participants are in I don't think monochromacy comes into it very much, beer goggles to the max setting :lol:

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A little local knowledge from someone living in Amsterdam

Red Light = Female

Red + Blue light = Not Female

I have had a few local bar staff regale me with stories of people who found out the hard way :D

Apparently, Israel have the green light.

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This should do the trick:

As a member of such a minority group I take the issues of diversity and equality very seriously. I support such values by choosing to lead by example and actively encourage honesty and integrity through mutually respectful discourse"

The point is, you probably are a member of some minority group. Blond haired? Check. Left handed? Check. Follow a religion? Check. Atheist? Check. Play tennis? Check. High IQ? Check? Low IQ? Check.

You get the idea.

If your bluff is called on this in an interview situation, it's time to really consider whether you want to work for this company. Personally I'd have some fun with them:

"I'm glad your company takes equality and diversity seriously. As an untersturmbahnfuhrer in the UK Nazi party I'm sick and tired of the oppression that I and my fellow ubermensch have to endure in today's intolerant and closed-minded society"

or

"I'm a predatory aggressive double-transvsttie. And if you don't formally offer me this job I will ensure that this company is taken to tribunal and you will be personally named and shamed in the media"

or how about

"What the self-righteous oppressors in this tyrannical country conveniently forget is that the children may enjoy it too, don't you think? I'm so glad we think alike"

Edited by THEBIGMAN

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I could show this by stating that I have paid prostitiues from all different creeds and colours. Equality A +

(going off-topic)

DELETED (noticed that someone else had posted the same reply).

Edited by DeepLurker

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If you are looking for a job in the modern world you will have to be aware of what is know as 'competenecy' based assessments. You will come across them in most interviews these days and they are now being used to sift people at the application stage. Drivel it may be but don't bother trying to fight it as it's now a fact of life. I would suggest that you google for help and advice as to how to answer such questions.

Thanks for that. Duly noted.

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Thanks for that. Duly noted.

heres a top site....even a video about how diversity is going to save the economy.

http://www.diversity...w/nav.006014002

and heres a top quote about one of the myriad courses you can enroll on

The Business Advantages of Supplier Diversity Conference provided an opportunity to explore the business benefits of diversifying your supply chain, showcase good practice and network with key businesses in London

Edited by Bloo Loo

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Haven't read it for a long time, but didn't the list include estate agents?

Also, weren't they sent from another planet to earth, where they then wiped out neanderthal man leading to our present day human species? :D

And hairdressers. You are quite right, thanks, I stand corrected. Still think that recruitment tools (a handy euphemism for personnel managers) are a load of spheroids. Gratifying to see from other comments they are at last discredited and going out of fashion.

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Thus if any fellow and sympathetic HPC members in the spirit of internet altruism, and for a chuckle, fancy sharing their quick thoughts for a particularly good 'blurb' to use to answer this section of the application form I would be very grateful - as I am sure will thousands of others reading this and also struggling to survive in this mdoern world that is needlessly made harder every day in the manner described here.

See how you get on with this...

I am active in supporting charities that help minority groups, in fact I recently assisted a nice Nigerian fellow I met online. His name was Prince Happy Sunrise, and his charity had been left $250,000,000 in the will of a nun from a local convent. Unfortunately, their bank account was unable to receive the funds, so I have assisted the Prince by allowing the charity to use my bank details to facilitate the transfer.

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