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Your Funniest Viewing

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What's the silliest/funniest/most gross thing that's happened to you on a viewing?

I almost bought a joke shop a few years aho , now that was funny!

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A few months ago I visited a top-floor flat with a very large living room that occupied two separate floors (Something that gets very hot in the summer, and costs a fortune to heat in the winter).

The bedroom was just under the building roof, and the distance between the floor and the ceiling was approximately 5 ft.

The kitchen was a tiny square room with 9 sq ft of walk-able space, and no space for a fridge.

I think the service charge was £75 a month, but I can't remember. What I remember was how dirty the communal area was.

Sad thing is, I'm not even exaggerating :blink:

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Early 08 looked at a house - needed a small fortune spending on it. Old person had lived there. As was typical it was priced about £5k less than a house that didnt need work doing.

The agent did one of those tricks where they arrange for 4 or 5 couples to trip over each other and try to play them off against each other.

As an act of revenge on the agent, and in a loud voice, I pointed out that the cheap replacement windows were a false economy as the bay around them had cracked!

Further fun was had pointing out that the numerous concrete steps out to the back garden would rule out anyone with kids.

On top of that I happened to louldy proclaim that the bolier (and flue) was too close to the window so not only was it unsightly in the bedroom it would be condemned at the first time of servicing.. Further questions were asked aloud whether it had ever been serviced, if not, was it a danger in the bedroom and potentially emitting Carbon monoxide...... I then asked myself out loud, "I wonder what the old dear died of"?

Surprisingly, it didnt sell for about 12 months, and even then it was massively reduced.

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Early 08 looked at a house - needed a small fortune spending on it. Old person had lived there. As was typical it was priced about £5k less than a house that didnt need work doing.

The agent did one of those tricks where they arrange for 4 or 5 couples to trip over each other and try to play them off against each other.

As an act of revenge on the agent, and in a loud voice, I pointed out that the cheap replacement windows were a false economy as the bay around them had cracked!

Further fun was had pointing out that the numerous concrete steps out to the back garden would rule out anyone with kids.

On top of that I happened to louldy proclaim that the bolier (and flue) was too close to the window so not only was it unsightly in the bedroom it would be condemned at the first time of servicing.. Further questions were asked aloud whether it had ever been serviced, if not, was it a danger in the bedroom and potentially emitting Carbon monoxide...... I then asked myself out loud, "I wonder what the old dear died of"?

Surprisingly, it didnt sell for about 12 months, and even then it was massively reduced.

We looked around a place like that. Whoever was actually selling the house hadn't bothered to clear anything from it, it was like the Marie Celeste. Washed up mugs on the drainer, dry washing still on the airer, bank statements and phone bills left out on the table...

The agent was obviously frustrated by both the asking price and the clutter, as he asked our opinion on both. We pointed out we'd seen enough stuff to be able to commit identity theft, and the state of the place indicated we were likely to get stiffed with getting it cleared.

We got a phone call a couple of weeks later to say the price had dropped, and the house had been 'decluttered'. The people who bought it still ended up giving loads of stuff away and filling several skips. Mind you they didn't pay even the revised asking price ;)

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What's the silliest/funniest/most gross thing that's happened to you on a viewing?

Had a look at a house once and there was a window between 2 bedrooms! One room had a chair in it looking at or through the window the other had just a matress on the floor!

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Had a look at a house once and there was a window between 2 bedrooms! One room had a chair in it looking at or through the window the other had just a matress on the floor!

A variation on the above, saw a place with a 'bedroom' with no windows where the owner had helpfully erected curtains against the wall just to pretend.

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Many years ago some of my friends rented a cheap student flat that had the toilet in the living room - I really kid you not.

Those living there just got used to the situation but all who visited never used the loo.

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Few weeks ago was trying to open a cupboard in a bedroom but the door was a bit stiff. EA said, 'steady on, there could be a body in there'. Sort of put me off the property (was an old persons house who had recently died, unchanged since the 1970s)

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Viewed what was advertised as a "unique" house - it certainly was, elderly couple with large barking smelly dogs you tripped over on the way in - house was virtually falling down and hadnt been touched for years ... and years ... but the elderly lady who owned it insisted on accompanying us round the house pointing out all the "wonderful" features - hmm would that be the peeling wallpaper, rusted windows, chewed carpets, cobwebs etc? Advertised as having a roof terrace - you had to climb up a ladder on the first floor squeezed into a corner piled with rubbish over the stairwell through the loft hatch trying to negotiate a dilapidated loft room full of more rubbish and junk - needless to say I gave that bit a miss. And then to cap it all, we had to tiptoe round her husband who was seriously ill in bed, in fact I wasn't convinced he was still with us!

It's all good fun ain't it!

:blink:

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Turned up to view a potential rental. It was quite difficult to arrange a viewing as the current tenants were not very receptive to viewings. Finally got an appointment after a week.

The tenants were a 12 strong Korean family. At the arranged time to view they were all tucking into dinner. The smell of the food was incredible and you knew that the smell would not be vacating the building with the tenants. :lol: We were asked to take our shoes off and were told we could not look into 2 of the 3 bedrooms because of elderly infirm relatives.

The agent was so embaressed. We found it funny and put it down to one of lifes experiences.

Another rental viewing was arranged with the old chap (Agent was not available) who owned a few properties down the same road. Went into the master bedroom and he felt the need to explain how if you stood in a certain position you could see the really fit neighbour sunbathing topless in the summer months. :lol: .. I was with the wife and we both nearly wet ourselves laughing.

Nowt stranger than folk...

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I turned up at a house without an appointment on the offchance I could get a look around (as I was flying out of the country a few days later and didn't have time to faff arround with the agent).

Owner was more than happy to show me around and offered me beers and a spliff !

Edited for speeling :-)

Edited by Spot

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Arrived early to a viewing and owner was clearly on the toilet and the house stunk so bad throughout the viewing. He had also used sports socks to fill in holes in the windows.

Went to see another house in Wilmslow where a kitchen had been installed over a doorway without blocking the door up - you opened the door from the hallway and could see the backs of the units. The house was filthy too.

Another house was a redeveloped old reservoir house, which was pretty nice inside, yet the downstairs toilet was just a soil pipe and water mains and to get into the house from the garage you had to walk sideways like a crab in a really tight space about 10 steps before you got into the house! Apparantly that was an unique design feature. Hilarious!

LM

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When for a viewing and the owner had paved the rear garden and was using it as a home to his 2 german shepard dogs. All I can remember about that place is the what looked like sewerage all over the paved area, 1/2 way up the walls and dog foot prints on the glass of the conservatory. The agent told us not to open the back door as there was a bit of a smell, but it was ok as the owner promised to get it cleaned up before we moved in.

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This is an easy one for me....December 2007...An E.A. Begged me...( pulling at me and actually begging ) to buy a house...or at least make an offer.

This was the same chap 3 months earlier told me I couldnt offer 10% off an asking price and expect to be taken seriously.

Edited by TheCountOfNowhere

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Two spring to mind, both when I was looking for a house in 1999.

First one was a house we weren't too sure about, but decided to have a look to see whether the inside would change our minds. We went on a Saturday afternoon, did downstairs, outside, then asked the vendor about upstairs. We were told we could go up there, but we'd have to be quiet as their son was still in bed, and we wouldn't be able to look in his room. We politely declined the offer of tip-toeing up the stairs and left...

Second one was a lovely house, which we viewed on a Sunday morning. From the particulars it looked great - lots of internal space, nice big garden. When we got there, the owners looked very dishevelled and apologised for the state of the house - they'd had a massive party the night before. The place looked like a bomb had hit it - bottles everywhere, party poppers all over the carpet, dirty plates piled up in the kitchen, and it smelt awful. We looked around and it was nice, but not as nice as we'd hoped. As we got towards the end of the viewing, we thought they were trying to hurry us up, and sure enough as we got to the front door, Mrs Vendor (looking very green) said "sorry, can't wait" and dashed off upstairs - we came to the conclusion she'd run off to throw up!

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Excellent thread! :lol: 5 stars. :)

My tales aren't quite as funny but had 2 memorable viewings in late 2003...

I saw a studio flat that was laughably tiny. Asking price £65,000. Even the viewings person (semi retired, not on commission) thought it was dreadfully overpriced.

Also viewed an ex-LA flat, after a bit of persuasion by the EA. I thought the appointment was at 5pm but the lady selling the flat thought it was at 5.30pm. Either the Estate Agent told us 2 different times or the vendor or I got the time wrong. Nice enough flat, the lady was OK despite the appointment mix up, her partner was having a phone conversation, which finished towards the end of my viewing. As we said our goodbyes, I glanced over to her partner, who started giving me the dagger stare. I don't know why. Either he had it in his mind too that I was too early, I looked like a timewaster to him, inadvertantly interrupted a telephone call regarding something not very legal or he thought I was trying to proposition the woman. :blink:

The EA didn't even get back to me about what I thought of the flat so I wondered if the guy giving me the stare was pressuring the EA to get prospective buyers to come round. :(

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Viewed and naivly offered on a "homes under the hammer" style refurb back in 2003 (would have been my first place, 242k agreed before I came to my senses). Can't remember all the dodgy things, but the best was the kitchen floor. Basically hideous deep pile 70s carpet that had wooden laminate flooring laid directly on top. Gap of around 1cm all around the edges so it didn't even go under or flush with the units. Probably could have pulled it around like a rug had a tried.

Seller said it was accepted in the industry as the best way to do it... "carpet under the laminate helps to insulate and provides a more comfortably bouncy floor which is less prone to damage, gap around the edge required for thermal expansion in the summer". Needless to say it sold less than a month after I pulled out for 265k.

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You don't think they were tenants putting off buyers?

Don't think so. They were gits though - I can't remember the exact numbers, but we did put in an offer at the asking price, which was something like £200k. They declined and took it off the market, then back on again about a month later at about £250k. EA said they'd had so many offers it had obviously been undervalued. Bloody thing sold as well...

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What's the silliest/funniest/most gross thing that's happened to you on a viewing?

I thought I was on Mumsnet there for a moment :unsure:

Or maybe you did :lol:

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I viewed a house with S&M equipment bolted into the ceiling. Apparently the lesbian owners would mend the ceiling if someone bought the house!

I saw a house with rotting food and dog excrement on the floors. There were gigantic dog bones littering every room in the house. I instinctively wiped my shoes on the way out of the house!!!

I saw another house filled with rubbish. The elderly lady was a hoarder. The attic was filled from top to toe with newspapers. There were mouse dropping everywhere.

I viewed a house that had a padlocked door leading to the eaves storage. I wanted to inspect it but the 3 elderly men living there wouldn't comply! I got out of there fast!

Went to see a house where the bizarre owner kept pulling the curtains shut and then opening them like some freak amateur theatre production. Very disturbing.

The scariest situation was during an inspection. I was crawling through the eaves and came face to face with the biggest wasp nest I've ever seen. At first I thought it was a dead body. The nest was still active.

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  • 312 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
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      • up 5%



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