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northwestsmith2

Jacqui Smith To Make Porn Show

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Jacqui Smith is to cash in on her dodgy expenses claims

Last night she said: ‘As I know from my personal experience, porn fascinates us – media and public alike. But we actually know very little about what it’s like to work in the industry and what porn is doing to our society, our children and our relationships.

Slightly more suprising than anything this year.

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She can kill two birds* with one stone here: She can explain both her husbands shameful activities while explaining her own with a show about PROPERTY PORN.

(Phwoar! Look at the bay windows on that! etc etc)

While her husband may well have been caught claiming for the cost of blue movies, I seem to remember that she was a senior minister in a government that presided over the biggest economic catastrophe in history, or are mammories that short we've forgotten that already?

Perhaps we should all take up watching blue movies - and collectively experience the sudden liquidity the economy so badly needs.

Perhaps she can combine porn with the Death of Dr David Kelly and explain precisely what's meant by "Going for a ramble in the Mendips".

On a serious note both should be doing a stretch* in Parkhurst - for fraud, misfeasance and maladministration - where they can both experience unusual sexual practices first hand.

(*Puns intended: With acknowledgments to the late great Ronnie Barker)

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She can explain both her husbands shameful activities

Considering that one of the films watched was gay porn, I look forward to that.

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I wonder what her fee is for this appearance. Knowing that it is paid out of our telly tax will, if that is possible, make me hate her even more. Thieving Labour scum, no better than pikeys, just better educated.

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Considering that one of the films watched was gay porn, I look forward to that.

I just hope she isn't tempted to take part in one, for "the sake of research"...maybe she has a few tricks up her sleeve, such as managing to shoot out Pilchards?

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I just hope she isn't tempted to take part in one, for "the sake of research"...maybe she has a few tricks up her sleeve, such as managing to shoot out Pilchards?

I need mind bleach and I need it now.

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She wanted some Governor job didn't she?

How many more politicians will the BBC hire? It is getting that almost the only people you see on the Beeb are failed politicians.

The link between parts of the BBC and politics is far too incestuous IMPO.

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I wonder what her fee is for this appearance. Knowing that it is paid out of our telly tax will, if that is possible, make me hate her even more.

One more reason why I don't watch TV (or have a licence).

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Fat rabid cow!

What could she possibly know about sex?

She probably thinks "Porn" is stuff played on a wind-up Pornograph!

:lol:

But then: what did NuLiebour pols actually know about anything.

Other than pork.

:rolleyes:

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I just hope she isn't tempted to take part in one, for "the sake of research"...maybe she has a few tricks up her sleeve, such as managing to shoot out Pilchards?

That would be real magic wizards sleeve kind of stuff

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I just hope she isn't tempted to take part in one, for "the sake of research"...maybe she has a few tricks up her sleeve, such as managing to shoot out Pilchards?

A little bit of sick came up to the back of my throat when I read that.

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Fat rabid cow!

Well, shame on you for 'weightism' as well as an inelegant post.

She's hardly a bad-looking woman for her age. It's unfortunate that her inadequate partner left her lusting after the Chippendales. Written up by Maupassant, one could have a lot of sympathy with her and her story.

But, she defrauded the taxpayer, that's the point.

And it's why she should be in jail.

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I wonder what her fee is for this appearance. Knowing that it is paid out of our telly tax will, if that is possible, make me hate her even more. Thieving Labour scum, no better than pikeys, just better educated.

Although not by much.

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She can kill two birds* with one stone here: She can explain both her husbands shameful activities while explaining her own with a show about PROPERTY PORN.

(Phwoar! Look at the bay windows on that! etc etc)

While her husband may well have been caught claiming for the cost of blue movies, I seem to remember that she was a senior minister in a government that presided over the biggest economic catastrophe in history, or are mammories that short we've forgotten that already?

Perhaps we should all take up watching blue movies - and collectively experience the sudden liquidity the economy so badly needs.

Perhaps she can combine porn with the Death of Dr David Kelly and explain precisely what's meant by "Going for a ramble in the Mendips".

On a serious note both should be doing a stretch* in Parkhurst - for fraud, misfeasance and maladministration - where they can both experience unusual sexual practices first hand.

(*Puns intended: With acknowledgments to the late great Ronnie Barker)

The socialist nomenklatura have a lot to answer for.

Ronnie Barker: a true gentleman and an iconic Englishman.

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Well, shame on you for 'weightism' as well as an inelegant post.

She's hardly a bad-looking woman for her age.

I do hope you jest...

She was born in 1962: which makes the woman just 49.

If my wife looked like that I would have either committed Harri Karri or headed for the tall timber long since.

BTW: I'm entitled to fattist perspective,'cos I've fought excess weight all my life since 13 years of age. The secret, I found was to stop eating far too much of the wrong things.

Hardly rocket science: this woman is ugly, fat and blobby: and mentally challenged too.

She looks rather like a dyspeptic gnome.

Oh; as well as being a staunch NuLiebour muppette.

The Gorgeous Ms Smith

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I dont think I could get that policy past my wife.

It's easier when you're single (and childless).

Having kids and no TV must be nearly impossible.

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If my wife looked like that I would have either committed Harri Karri or headed for the tall timber long since.

. . . this woman is ugly, fat and blobby: and mentally challenged too. She looks rather like a dyspeptic gnome.

So, I guess what you're really saying is, she's . . . 'not your type'.

Why not just come straight out with it.

:lol:

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I do hope you jest...

She was born in 1962: which makes the woman just 49.

If my wife looked like that I would have either committed Harri Karri or headed for the tall timber long since.

BTW: I'm entitled to fattist perspective,'cos I've fought excess weight all my life since 13 years of age. The secret, I found was to stop eating far too much of the wrong things.

Hardly rocket science: this woman is ugly, fat and blobby: and mentally challenged too.

She looks rather like a dyspeptic gnome.

Oh; as well as being a staunch NuLiebour muppette.

The Gorgeous Ms Smith

that's not all your life then is it?

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that's not all your life then is it?

Indeed it is: simply that I didn't do anything about it until then.

OK?

:lol:

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I do hope you jest...

She was born in 1962: which makes the woman just 49.

If my wife looked like that I would have either committed Harri Karri or headed for the tall timber long since.

BTW: I'm entitled to fattist perspective,'cos I've fought excess weight all my life since 13 years of age. The secret, I found was to stop eating far too much of the wrong things.

Hardly rocket science: this woman is ugly, fat and blobby: and mentally challenged too.

She looks rather like a dyspeptic gnome.

Oh; as well as being a staunch NuLiebour muppette.

The Gorgeous Ms Smith

I wonder if Thomas gave her a thoroughly good hyding

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Surely Ms. Smith would be better qualified to talk about small business?

The biggest bane I can remember is keeping all your receipts and working out what is chargeable and deductible.

Now, Ms. Smith can manage to keep every shred of paper, even for a bathplug, and enter it in the taxpayer's ledger.

Of course, that might have something to do with the £90,000 the taxpayer pays for her 'assistants'. The self-employed struggling to turn over £60,000 don't have this additional funding to employ assistants, they just get the fines for any paperwork that's incorrect.

This programme is not necessary. We are all adult enough to choose whether we watch porn or not.

Unfortunately, we have no choice about MPs' Expenses Porn.

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  • 284 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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