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Convincing The Mrs

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This is my first post on HPC, but I've been following the whole thing with great interest for the last 5 years.

My main incentive for positing is to ask advice on how to convince my other half that a severe reduction of house prices is about to take place (albeit possibly over the next two years)? She perusaded me to see a mortgage advisor a few months back who informed us we could look for a house around the £150 - £170k mark, which in the are we currently rent would get us a two bed terrace. I hoped the IMA visit might bring her down to earth, but it has the opposite effect.

We rent a lovely place and have been happy for over a year, but our friends have made the jump, some very recently and have taken out mortgages for upto £180k. I know deep down that this doesn't add up and am starting to bore the mrs with predictions of a house price crash etc.

What are the killer facts/points I can tell her before she runs off putting offers in behind my back!?

Thanks in advance.

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If you buy at the wrong time and get on overpriced mortgage round your neck at the wrong stage of a bubble market it can destroy your finances, possibly your marriage and you won't be moving up any proverbial ladders for potentially a long time to come. It may well scupper any retirement plans you have too.

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WestBrom

I take it then you have waited 5 years for a HPC whilst renting !- you should have bought 5 year ago mate!!

I agree the market was showing no signs of turning 5 years ago, look at the attached graph and let HPI be yourguide of when to buy and sell:

Nationwide HPI Buy/Sell signal

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We've only been renting for just over a year - before that we were both at parents. In my opinion, we are the of the generation who graduated when the prices were low (ish) and had more important things to worry about, such as finding a stable job which pays more than three pounds and a pickled egg a week.

We've been working since 2000, but the increases have simply outstripped our wages making it impossible for us to buy.

Obviously this is my opinion. If I went with her view I'd have a 100% mortgage on a £220k three bed new build, but without the luxury of living in it as I'd be hospitalised through stress.

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Buy her a copy of today's Mail - that should do it!

Explain to her that you won't commit your family to the financial insecurity involved in having that amount of debt. Point out that no job is secure, and that although interest rates are stable now, in two years time, when the debt has not diminished, they could go up. Point out that if the market stays stagnant, and if circumstances change, it would be very difficult to move to find work or otherwise.

Explain that experts are divided on whether house prices will stagnate or fall and that you won't take that risk.

Point out that your desire for your family's financial security is at least as strong and counts for at least as much emotionally as her desire for a house to own. You have your family's best interests at heart. Don't be fobbed off with arguments of "it's all about the money to you".

Hope this helps.

T&T

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What are the killer facts/points I can tell her before she runs off putting offers in behind my back!?

Well, if she's putting in offers without you knowing, she must be able to pay for it as well!

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This is my first post on HPC, but I've been following the whole thing with great interest for the last 5 years.

My main incentive for positing is to ask advice on how to convince my other half that a severe reduction of house prices is about to take place (albeit possibly over the next two years)? She perusaded me to see a mortgage advisor a few months back who informed us we could look for a house around the £150 - £170k mark, which in the are we currently rent would get us a two bed terrace. I hoped the IMA visit might bring her down to earth, but it has the opposite effect.

We rent a lovely place and have been happy for over a year, but our friends have made the jump, some very recently and have taken out mortgages for upto £180k. I know deep down that this doesn't add up and am starting to bore the mrs with predictions of a house price crash etc.

What are the killer facts/points I can tell her before she runs off putting offers in behind my back!?

Thanks in advance.

Easy - show her any graph of house prices over the last 5 years. Do you want to buy at that peak? Show her average earnings v house prices. Does she think that's sustainable? If so, tell he to foot the mortgage and you'll rent a room off her. If you split, the house is hers. Somehow I don't think she'll 'buy' that.

How much are you paying in rent at the moment? How much do you want to buy? How long do you plan on staying there? What are your family circumstances? Etc., etc., etc. No-one here can tell you if it's right for you to buy or not - only you can make that decision.

Also, I'm not quite sure why you expected a 'mortgage advisor' (i.e. a thick-o failure at school who couldn't get a real job) to give you advice not to buy? Or is it the figures that are a problem? What could you buy for 150k-170k in your chosen area? What you want? Or a shoe-box in a crime-riddled ghetto?

Nomadd

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I was the wife who a few years ago listened to my husband tell me we are in a house price bubble - thing is, back then he was the only one who was telling me this was the case (apart from one Andrew Oswald bloke article. We sold and rented, i've always struggled. It's really difficult to believe the one you love when everyone else around you is calling you an idiot for renting - usually people who you value the opinion of. That's why i was really pleased i found this website - as it has lots of people with this opinion.

Reasons why i now prefer to wait to buy:

Even if house prices don't go down (and they're starting to) - they're as likely to go up as a lead balloon.

We can carry on saving more money than we would be able to pay off in mortgage.

If we had a mortgage and things went wrong, we wouldn't have anything to fall back on.

We're really comfortable as we are.

The only reason why i would buy (and we won't) is if i panicked. It's really a matter of nerve, but it's easier now - as it's starting to happen - you just need to look at the signs properly.

Why does she want to buy a house now - because her friends are? Because she thinks house prices will go higher?

She needs to know this is only the beginning of thing - how would she feel if house prices went down, and you were in negative equity for 5/6/7 years.

Stick to your guns - i know how it feels to be in her shoes, she just needs a bit more evidence. Get her to read the madness of crowds - or get her to look at what the papers were saying back on the last crash on here - it's just too spooky - good luck!

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This is my first post on HPC, but I've been following the whole thing with great interest for the last 5 years.

My main incentive for positing is to ask advice on how to convince my other half that a severe reduction of house prices is about to take place.

Give up mate, the job of the woman in a relationship is to ignore what the man says then blame it on him when she didn't follow his advice!

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Give up mate, the job of the woman in a relationship is to ignore what the man says then blame it on him when she didn't follow his advice!

Na mate. Take it from a Chick. The way to deal with this situation is to tell her you would love to buy, but you want it to be perfect for whatever little foibles shes got. Even go out to and check out some houses with her!!! :rolleyes:

Get very crestfallen and sympathetic when it doesn't have just the right ambience :( (we love that stuff!), and make sure you (casually) turn on the tele just after the next doomsday scenario HPC documentary has started... and just when she's getting into it switch it over to the footy (give in, get a beer out of the fridge and sulk in the backyard when she wants to keep watching it), <_< and then about 1/4 of an hour after the programme has finished get all excited about a house you saw on rightmove. :D

Get upset (a bit sulky) when she starts to think its a bad idea <_< but don't drag her too far into futher optimism :ph34r: and listen carefully to her arguements when she says she thinks its better to wait awhile :rolleyes:

Have you got that? It would work a treat on me :lol::lol::lol:

Edited by Elizabeth

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Me and the Mrs are both 30, living in Hertfordshire and will be FTB's effectively, we have over £90k between us in the bank, we wouldn't touch property even if our parts were on fire.

Don't do it mate, sit tight - show her this thread!

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My mate had this exact same problem with his fiance. I think women get to a certain age and all they want is a house and kids. Rationality flies out of the window. He simply said to her that if she wanted to buy a house then she could go ahead. Pure and simple. She had a look and realised that there was no way that she could afford to buy even a garage, and i think from all accounts the penny dropped. She still nags from time to time, but its more of a nag at how unaffordable housing is as opposed to a nag of wanting to buy somewhere.

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I was the wife who a few years ago listened to my husband tell me we are in a house price bubble - thing is, back then he was the only one who was telling me this was the case - That's why i was really pleased i found this website - as it has lots of people with this opinion.

Invite her onto this website!

I was also really pleased to find this website, I was in the process of saving up a deposit to buy my first place with all friends and relatives telling me to hurry, hurry, hurry before I missed the boat completely - and then I visited HPC.com.

Now I am prepared to wait because now I am hearing two sides to the story.

Perhaps your wife is only hearing one side of the story from everyone close to her (you being the exception) maybe she needs to read more of the arguments in her own time and maybe she needs to know you are not the only one saying this.

Good luck :)

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What are the killer facts/points I can tell her before she runs off putting offers in behind my back!?

Assert your manhood, bend throw her over the side of your bet and give her a sound spanking - just enough to rosey those cheeks!

She will thank you for it and will no longer be concerned about looking for a house... and her female friends will look at you in a new way! ;)

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Assert your manhood, bend throw her over the side of your bet and give her a sound spanking - just enough to rosey those cheeks!

She will thank you for it and will no longer be concerned about looking for a house... and her female friends will look at you in a new way!  ;)

You know I had to take you to casualty the last time you tried that! ;):lol:

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I had the same problem convincing my wife that once we had sold we should wait to buy for a few years (I talked her into buying because I felt our house price was valued at the most we would ever get for it) and I also feel that a crash is coming.

I did the following to help my case... first I lined up some viewings on houses that were at the top of our budget that hadn't sold - and when we visited them, the reason they hadn't sold was because they weren't worth what was being asked of them.

I also made a point of monitoring houses that came onto the market that I felt were over-priced, pointing them out to my other half, and then pointing them out again as they were reduced / are still unsold.

I did this over the period from Jan til about May.. we must easily have visited 10-15 houses.... and somewhere along the line the penny dropped.

She's now just agreed to sign up for another 6 months lease, and is as much a house price bear as I am !!!

Good Luck !

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My mate had this exact same problem with his fiance. I think women get to a certain age and all they want is a house and kids. Rationality flies out of the window. .

Do not even consider buying a house yet if you are going to have children. WE had a child before school age when we sold, and our minds lost us for a moment and we nearly bought! Consider this: you buy a house - it's ok - two bedroomed, small yard, nice though. Near to good schools, - perfect. You have a child - you may find the area is a bit rougher then you thought (manageable) - hmm the garden's a little too small for a child - oh no: changed the catchment area for the lovely little school we wanted Porscha* to go to - oh no we better move! And you're due to have another child soon - arrrgghhhh - you can't sell the house - because the price has dropped. We would have had that problem had we have bought - and we found that the area we wanted to live in wasn't really where we wanted to be, and learned there were other considerations we wanted to make before moving. It could be any situation though. Ask her if she thinking with her head or her heart?

*names have been changed for security reasons!

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  • 301 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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