Tenubracon Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 (edited) Of the many things that wind me up about EAs, one of the smaller irritants is the way they rename places then add £50k to the asking price. For example, when I spent a few months living in Manchester, I was shown a place in 'the Northern Quarter', as the EA insisted on calling it, trying to give it an allure that, for some reason, 'Ancoats' just doesn't deliver. It was a classic new build with small boxy rooms and paper walls. This flat was the penthhouse, apparently, which meant that it had slightly bigger windows and afforded the occupant fine views right over the Ancoats Road to the building sites beyond. Here in Eastbourne, we have the glamorous sounding 'Little Chelsea' area, which the EAs would have you believe is a centre of artistic and creative energy that is a magnet to all the Boho types moving here from London. Actually, it is a couple of streets near the station where the rows of charity shops are broken up by over-priced antique shops and independent retailers of aspirational goods that you can pick up cheaper on the web. The houses are mainly 2-bed victorian places, quite nice, but many are HMOs or student lets. Not gonna fool Roman Abromovich, though, is it? Any how, what other flights of EA imagination have you come across? Edited November 23, 2010 by Tenubracon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RichB Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 The silly ******* just do themselves out of business, get so wound up looking on their sites I just eliminate them from the game. Just ******s me off, I want to search for Surbiton - NOT sodding TOLWORTH, that's why I wrote SURBITON in the bloody box you *****. And ditch the sodding 'SOLD' properties as well you ******ing timewasting arseholes, I'm looking to buy not browse whats gone under offer you tits. /vent Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cica Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 I live in the "Green Quarter", Manchester (moving to a shared kitchen flat soon though) not far from the Northern Quarter. It's basically Cheetham Hill which I believe has a bit of a red light district (though not as big as the Piccadilly Station area) and is rough as balls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenubracon Posted November 23, 2010 Author Share Posted November 23, 2010 (edited) I live in the "Green Quarter", Manchester (moving to a shared kitchen flat soon though) not far from the Northern Quarter. It's basically Cheetham Hill which I believe has a bit of a red light district (though not as big as the Piccadilly Station area) and is rough as balls. From what I remember, Manchester basically is a red-light district. Edited November 23, 2010 by Tenubracon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Austin Allegro Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 The funniest I ever saw was a flat in Kilburn which was described by the EA as 'situated to the west of West Hampstead'. The attempt to 'rebrand' an entire part of London (the area around Holborn) by Candy-Brother type 'pwoppateh devewwopahs' as 'Midtown' a few years ago has hopefully failed miserably as well. Another trick EAs use is to take a sh*tty area which borders a nice one and refer to it by the name of the nice area, eg 'Hampstead borders' for Kentish Town, or create an entirely fictional location out of a sh*t area such as a 'Triangle', 'Ladder' etc named after the nearest nice area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenubracon Posted November 23, 2010 Author Share Posted November 23, 2010 (edited) The funniest I ever saw was a flat in Kilburn which was described by the EA as 'situated to the west of West Hampstead'. Reminds me of a conversation with an EA many years ago about Balham, south London. He described it a being south of Clapham South, so I've always referred to Balham as 'Clapham Very South' since then. Edited November 23, 2010 by Tenubracon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPin Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 Beasley Street! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lennon Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 Reminds me of a conversation with an EA many years ago about Balham, south London. He described it a being south of Clapham South, so I've always referred to Balham as 'Clapham Very South' since then. In the days before Battersea was as 'posh' as it is now - I saw a reference to it as South Chelsea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olebrum Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 There is the 'Golden Triangle' in Norwich. Which is surrounded by the worst estates in the whole city. One particular area is known as 'Monkey Island' to those in the know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lepista Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 ... where the rows of charity shops are broken up by over-priced antique shops and independent retailers of aspirational goods that you can pick up cheaper on the web... Ah, but can you buy twigs in vases there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenubracon Posted November 23, 2010 Author Share Posted November 23, 2010 (edited) Ah, but can you buy twigs in vases there? If not, a reliable source tells me there's a 'park' nearby, where twigs can be found literally lying around on the ground! Who says the streets aren't paved with gold! Edited November 23, 2010 by Tenubracon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Monk Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 I must admit St. Reatham sounds better than Streatham. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lennon Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 I must admit St. Reatham sounds better than Streatham. St Ockwell doesn't work quite so well... but still better than the original Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustAnotherProle Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 Ah, but can you buy twigs in vases there? People who get taken in by EAs and think twigs in vases add 50k to a house price shop here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBUzw-0ev_A Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikthe20 Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 Good thread. I remember reading in the Sunday Times once that "Acton is the new Nappa Valley"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maddog21 Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 (edited) In central Slough ,just south of the High St. Sir William Herschel once lived in one of the streets in a manor house that has long been knocked down for offices. There are a few streets with old victorian houses mostly been bashed into flats , which is known in local EA speak as "The Herschel Village" a village it is not!! Edited November 23, 2010 by Maddog21 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lepista Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 Jovality and EA-bashing aside, what is it that defines an area? Is it just a function of the people there, or does the naming of an area create a mindset that attracts a certain type of perason, thus self-reinforcing that idyll? Of course there are shipholes that will always be like that, no matter what the name, but I have often wondered about how seemingly similar streets in a similar area can get such different characteristics. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenubracon Posted November 25, 2010 Author Share Posted November 25, 2010 (edited) OK, this isn't rebranding an area, but it is bloody stupid. The house is near a marina, sooooo ,,,, they've changed the names of the rooms on the floorplans to things like 'cabin' and 'mess'. Check the floorplans: http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-31820780.html Those kerazee agents! Edited November 25, 2010 by Tenubracon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wealthy Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 (edited) Good thread. I remember reading in the Sunday Times once that "Acton is the new Nappa Valley"! "Poets Corner" in Acton is the one that crack me up "To the east, around Acton Central station, is Poets' Corner. This is the area's top draw, the conversions are tasteful and the housing, of whatever size, feels gentrified. Workers' terraced houses have mutated into rustic cottages, although larger versions, close to the high street - here called The Vale - have come to the attention of housing associations and others carrying out conversions." Edited November 25, 2010 by wealthy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tenubracon Posted November 25, 2010 Author Share Posted November 25, 2010 "Poets Corner" in Acton is the one that crack me up "To the east, around Acton Central station, is Poets' Corner. This is the area's top draw, the conversions are tasteful and the housing, of whatever size, feels gentrified. Workers' terraced houses have mutated into rustic cottages, although larger versions, close to the high street - here called The Vale - have come to the attention of housing associations and others carrying out conversions." Think there's a Poets' Corner in Hove, too. But no Poets. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juvenal Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 I must admit St. Reatham sounds better than Streatham. I live in St.Evenage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thecrashingisles Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 I live in St.Evenage. I live in Stives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isakndar Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 Actually I think Acton was called Nappy Valley because of the high procreation rate. And Poets Corner is quite apt as all the streets are named after poets - (I looked at a very nice flat there to buy) Acton has always been promoted as an up a coming area - but I guess it has upped and went - though there is some very nice housing if you know where to look. I lived just of Horn Lane for 9 years, Acton is the sort of place that someone would dump a matress or a fridge in the street and it would remain there for weeks, and you could pop down the newagents for your fags dressed in your dressing gown. Though I did miss the sofa that was dumped by the bus stop - it made a comfortable place to sit wating for the bus when it was not soaking wet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lepista Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 (edited) Think there's a Poets' Corner in Hove, too. But no Poets. There is, it's named so because all the street names are poets. Google Maps Link Edited November 25, 2010 by Lepista Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diver Dan Posted November 25, 2010 Share Posted November 25, 2010 There's a place in Northern Ireland and they keep trying to gentrify the name of it by sticking the word "London" in front. How bizarre is that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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