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Why Are You Withdrawing This Cash?

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So I popped into my local bank this lunchtime, timed to be at a busy time, to withdraw some cash over the counter (> cash machine allowance).

Of course they have to ask "why are you withdrawing this cash".

After making a scene about personal privacy and police state I loudly said:

"To ensure I have some cash to protect myself from the coming systemic banking failure".

There were some really worried looks behind me in the queue and some embarrassed shuffling from behind the counter.

All good fun - spreading the word and all that! :)

Bos.

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So I popped into my local bank this lunchtime, timed to be at a busy time, to withdraw some cash over the counter (> cash machine allowance).

Of course they have to ask "why are you withdrawing this cash".

After making a scene about personal privacy and police state I loudly said:

"To ensure I have some cash to protect myself from the coming systemic banking failure".

There were some really worried looks behind me in the queue and some embarrassed shuffling from behind the counter.

All good fun - spreading the word and all that! :)

Bos.

I'm tempted to go and make a withdrawal tomorrow, even though I don't really need any cash at the moment. "I'm going to buy gold bullion and tins of baked beans."

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It's none of their business is it?

Just make up some bunk, like, there's a second hand car I'm buying, and the garage dealer's card reader is down.

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So I popped into my local bank this lunchtime, timed to be at a busy time, to withdraw some cash over the counter (> cash machine allowance).

Of course they have to ask "why are you withdrawing this cash".

After making a scene about personal privacy and police state I loudly said:

"To ensure I have some cash to protect myself from the coming systemic banking failure".

There were some really worried looks behind me in the queue and some embarrassed shuffling from behind the counter.

All good fun - spreading the word and all that! :)

Bos.

The word that you're the village idiot?

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If you had a few accomplices, this could get quite hilarious

"oh my, i had better withdraw my cash as well, to protect myself from the afformentioned imminent banking failure"

Fun that costs nothing

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So I popped into my local bank this lunchtime, timed to be at a busy time, to withdraw some cash over the counter (> cash machine allowance).

...

All good fun - spreading the word and all that! :)

Bos.

Call me demanding, but I'd prefer a video upload of you trying to redeem a £5 note in the foyer of the Old Lady of Thread Needle St.

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Of course they have to ask "why are you withdrawing this cash".

What sort of answer would you need to give them in order for them to refuse giving it to you?

After making a scene about personal privacy and police state I loudly said:

"To ensure I have some cash to protect myself from the coming systemic banking failure".

See, that's where they knew you were bluffiing - otherwise you'd have been asking to close your account down, and take out every laswt penny, counted out in fronto of you, then asking where the nearest wholesale bean shop was, and declaring to the crowd that you're setting up a stall outside to buy any unwanted gold and declaring your house offlimits to anyone 'who doesn't want a crossbow bolt in their face'.

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I've been withdrawing cash from the ATM for months, £300 per day, it will probably take another three months although I am getting ready to make a large cash withdrawal from the Nationwide any day soon.

Doubt I will win though, they will probably just re-issue a new run of banknotes and declare the last lot invalid.

scan0002.jpg

Welcome to the future!

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:rolleyes:

It has nothing to do with the Banks being scared of you taking their money. It is for sales purposes.

Bank Cashiers really know very little, and in most cases zero, about how the places they work in actually are run.

Same goes for most employees in large companies IMO.

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Maybe the question is in the "Standard Operating Procedure" or a pop-up comes up on their screen for any withdrawals >£x.

Er, they may have to type in what you said on your record after the prompt.

Why don't we have retail bankers on this forum?

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Or hookers only take cash .....

I like that one.

Hookers, gambling and alcohol is the perfect mix.

Personally I think them asking you that question seems to draw attention to the fact you are taking out a large sum of cash. Bit of a "rob me I am minted" type highlight. Not sure the bank are being very clever.

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So I popped into my local bank this lunchtime, timed to be at a busy time, to withdraw some cash over the counter (> cash machine allowance).

Of course they have to ask "why are you withdrawing this cash".

After making a scene about personal privacy and police state I loudly said:

"To ensure I have some cash to protect myself from the coming systemic banking failure".

There were some really worried looks behind me in the queue and some embarrassed shuffling from behind the counter.

All good fun - spreading the word and all that! :)

Bos.

Money Laundering Regulations.....Simples

Russain Hookers and a couple of keys cocaine would have be funnier.......... :ph34r:

Edited by Mr. Miyagi

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Maybe the question is in the "Standard Operating Procedure" or a pop-up comes up on their screen for any withdrawals >£x.

Standard patter. Same as when you put lots of money in. "Have you thought about opening one of our new savings accounts Sir ?"

They don't actually give a flying ******. They get paid about £14k per year and if you asked them to explain fractional reserve banking - most would probably call 999 to get you arrested for sexual assualt.

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If you had a few accomplices, this could get quite hilarious

"oh my, i had better withdraw my cash as well, to protect myself from the afformentioned imminent banking failure"

Fun that costs nothing

Watch from 1.30 in.....

:)

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If you had a few accomplices, this could get quite hilarious

"oh my, i had better withdraw my cash as well, to protect myself from the afformentioned imminent banking failure"

Fun that costs nothing

Yes, some sort of flash mob would be very amusing. :lol:

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Money Laundering Regulations.....Simples

Russain Hookers and a couple of keys cocaine would have be funnier.......... :ph34r:

Unlikely to be money laundering, unless he withdrew >£10,000. That's the legal reporting limit. Less than that won't make a report unless it's a repeated pattern seen as an attempt to avoid the reporting, i.e. £8,000 per day for a few days.

It is more likely it's an internal security precaution, extra ID etc to prevent fraud.

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I've been withdrawing cash from the ATM for months, £300 per day, it will probably take another three months although I am getting ready to make a large cash withdrawal from the Nationwide any day soon.

Doubt I will win though, they will probably just re-issue a new run of banknotes and declare the last lot invalid.

scan0002.jpg

Welcome to the future!

You are never going to get below that £16k!! If you do they will recall all £20 notes and then when you go to the bank with the sacks full they will want to know where it came from. and there will be a tap on your shoulder from a dole officer.

What about opening an account with a bookmaker and deposting some there? You can make cash deposits and withdrawals in shops at firms such as Ladbrokes. Or use an online one based abroad such as Stan James in Gibraltar.

Or maybe using such as paypal to store some?

I'm worried about all this cash at your house!!

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I'm worried about all this cash at your house!!

Don't worry, I have got one of those dogs that were banned under the Dangerous Dogs Act, bought him dead cheap just afterwards, no way would he let anyone get to the money ;)

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More likely they want to cross sell him something. They didn't have any beans so were a bit stumped.

Yes, that is right. My local branch of Barclays were out of tin foil hats too today.

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Don't worry, I have got one of those dogs that were banned under the Dangerous Dogs Act, bought him dead cheap just afterwards, no way would he let anyone get to the money ;)

Why did you buy him dead? I am sure he was cheap in that state, but I mean?

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If you had a few accomplices, this could get quite hilarious

"oh my, i had better withdraw my cash as well, to protect myself from the afformentioned imminent banking failure"

Fun that costs nothing

Oooo I think I sense a visit to the bank coming on.

:)

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Don't worry, I have got one of those dogs that were banned under the Dangerous Dogs Act, bought him dead cheap just afterwards, no way would he let anyone get to the money ;)

Only one? Surely you need two? The second to guard the house while you take the first one out for a walk?

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  • 140 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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