Men Are From Mars ... And We Should Give Up Trying To Impress Women

[Sledgehead]

Gwad bless 'um and vive la difference.

Telegraph readers will appreciate this most cos they'll have access to the layout of today's page 3 story, but I'll do my best to recount this incident that illustrates how singularly pointless it is trying to impress women with fast cars.

Essentially, page 3 is given over to a story about how the Qatari's have turned Knightsbride into a supercar race track. Apparently the street soutside Harrods are now lined with Bugattis, Ferraris and other supercar marques. Here's a pic used in the story:

There are a couple of other pics - a yellow ferrari and a Bugatti. Essentially page 3 looks like it was sub-edited by Jezzer Clarkson, all apart that is for one photo. Set alongside these supercar pictures is one of a Knightsbrigde resident who objects to having been effectively cast as an extra in a high-end remake of The Fast & The Furious. She is Lady Sorrell, and here is the picture:

So now you have the picture of what page 3 looks like, you might well be able to guess the kind of reaction I might get when showing said page to people.

How's about "ooh, isn't that beautiful". Seems about right? Now if you are a male, like me, you might assume that comment refered to the splash of finely tuned automotive delights bathing your retinas. Think again. The comment came from a woman, and she was refering to the handbag. My reaction: "What handbag?"

An anedotal yes, but this woman wasn't even that "girlie". Take note males!

[Errol]

I wish I owned a handbag factory.

[Harry Sacks]

I'm watching the cockerel shagging one of the hens outside our window.

[Bossybabe]

When I worked in W2, a Bugatti with an arabic number plate parked on the street at a meter outside my office window. He didn't stop to feed the meter. Along comes a traffic warden, walks round the car and gets out his notebook. Looks at the number plate. Scratches his head and scurries away. How I wish my number plate was in arabic!

[Guest Skinty]

My first reaction was how much I like the colour of the cars.

[@contradevian]

My first reaction was how much I like the colour of the cars.

I'm sure I had a Hillman Husky (basically an Imp estate) that colour once.

[R K]

You can't buy class.

Dubai springs to mind.

Of course, Russian crooks, banksters, Qataris and footballers may have a different view.

[Executive Sadman]

You can't buy class.

Dubai springs to mind.

Of course, Russian crooks, banksters, Qataris and footballers may have a different view.

Latest chav done good/chav got credit card chariot of choice round here, usually in bright red or other lurid colour.

It actually wouldnt look out of place on a 1985 miami vice episode.

[Darkman]

When I worked in W2, a Bugatti with an arabic number plate parked on the street at a meter outside my office window. He didn't stop to feed the meter. Along comes a traffic warden, walks round the car and gets out his notebook. Looks at the number plate. Scratches his head and scurries away. How I wish my number plate was in arabic!

Tickets issued to foreign plates get binned anyway. That's why some wardens fabricate tickets (to make up the numbers) using bogus foreign plates.