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justanewbie

"business Unravelling"

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A spokesperson for the maker of Velvet toilet tissue has warned that its UK workforce could bear the brunt of a restructuring set to cost 3,600 jobs.

"Business is just unravelling," said the spokesperson. "We were flushed

with success last year, but now our profits are down the sewer.

We have been struggling to find a niche for our products, some new

crevice, but it seems we have reached the bottom."

The spokesperson went on to tell us that there had been a small upsurge

in sales but this had all been in the staff shop after the redundancies

had been announced.

Svenska Cellulosa employs some 7,000 staff at 30 sites.

Edited by justanewbie

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A spokesperson for the maker of Velvet toilet tissue has warned that its UK workforce could bear the brunt of a restructuring set to cost 3,600 jobs.

"Business is just unravelling," said the spokesperson. "We were flushed

with success last year, but now our profits are down the sewer.

We have been struggling to find a niche for our products, some new

crevice, but it seems we have reached the bottom."

Svenska Cellulosa employs some 7,000 staff at 30 sites.

It's a sh$t business-you are best off out of it.

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Bring on the Poo Puns :rolleyes:

The soiled to rent brigade are looking to bottom feed the market from the turd big

market crash.

PHIL (mapants) and Krusty celebrate their new show BrickSh1tHouse where they pick up cheap houses as they are flush with cash.

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  • 302 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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