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The Masked Tulip

Amazing What You Read On Dating Sites

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Text from an online dating profile:

I admit that, throughout my marriage, I indulged myself in various extra-marital 'diversions.' My husbands sexually inadequacy caused great frustration and I admit I went a little wild. My friend's husbands; my husband's friends; even my son's friends on more than one occasion; other ships that passed in the night, men from wine bars, pub gardens, tradesmen, boys from parks. I was out of control and see that now.

As a stay-at-home wife I had all day to brood and become morbidly obsessed with the satisfaction I wasn't getting. I really felt I had no choice as he was so poor in bed.

Then the bombshell. He left me for another woman. The last thing he said was 'she is younger that you, prettier that you, better body than you and better in bed.' I was - and still am - shattered.

Now I am coming up to 40. I am alone. Suddenly the life that I so thrived on don't seem as alluring when I have an empty house, no one to go home to. And a five bedroon detatched house is a bad place to be lonely in.

I am prepared to offer myself fully so as not to be lonely.

I know I will/may have to accept the type of man I would not have looked at twice when I was younger.

Please note. Intelligence is valued above perhaps anything else. Chat here. Friendship to start with.....

QUICK NOTE: I am primarily seeking a single/divorced man as I am seeking an LTR with possible marriage. BUT IF you are married and prepared to leave your wife at some point then I could still be interested. Thank you.

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Has got to be "Plenty of Fish"

oh hang on looking at your avatar maybe "MyFbuddy"?

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Now I am coming up to 40. I am alone. Suddenly the life that I so thrived on don't seem as alluring when I have an empty house, no one to go home to. And a five bedroon detatched house is a bad place to be lonely in.

At least she got the house!? :unsure:

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IMHO reverse physiology, people don't change. IMHO She is after money from a daft sod, but is flying a flag saying look at me you don't need to worry and I have changed (and I am really dirty)

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Guest Dizzy Rash Call
Text from an online dating profile:

Sound's like a wind up (the last line).

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:lol:

I wouldn't touch her with an extremely long pole. Why admit that you are incapable of being faithful and quite possibly mentally ill, and then state you are looking for long term relationship and marriage ? Does she think that her"refreshing" honesty will win some favour !?

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I admit that, throughout my marriage, I indulged myself in various extra-marital 'diversions.'

I'm a schlapper.

My husbands sexually inadequacy caused great frustration and I admit I went a little wild. My friend's husbands; my husband's friends; even my son's friends on more than one occasion; other ships that passed in the night, men from wine bars, pub gardens, tradesmen, boys from parks. I was out of control and see that now.

I'm a real schlapper: who is only quasi-literate.

As a stay-at-home wife I had all day to brood and become morbidly obsessed with the satisfaction I wasn't getting. I really felt I had no choice as he was so poor in bed.

And, as well as being a real schlapper, I'm an effing lazy cow too!

Then the bombshell. He left me for another woman. The last thing he said was 'she is younger that you, prettier that you, better body than you and better in bed.' I was - and still am - shattered.

He wised up: good. And apart from being a schlapper, you were totally useless in the sack too!

As, no doubt all those "husbands; my husband's friends; even my son's friends on more than one occasion; other ships that passed in the night, men from wine bars, pub gardens, tradesmen, boys from parks" found out fairly quickly: which is precisely why they don't share your house!

Now I am coming up to 40. I am alone. Suddenly the life that I so thrived on don't seem as alluring when I have an empty house, no one to go home to. And a five bedroon detatched house is a bad place to be lonely in.

Now a wrinkly schlapper who looks like something the cat refused point blank to drag in!

And the bribe is a five bedroom house!

Don't write for the Daily Mail do you?

I am prepared to offer myself fully so as not to be lonely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah: we go that bit: to every "husbands; my husband's friends; even my son's friends on more than one occasion; other ships that passed in the night, men from wine bars, pub gardens, tradesmen, boys from parks".

All provided they are certified mentally challenged, half blind and have zero sense of smell!

I know I will/may have to accept the type of man I would not have looked at twice when I was younger.

A desperate schlapper to boot!

But , but, but, you have already accepted them, including, "husbands; my husband's friends; even my son's friends on more than one occasion; other ships that passed in the night, men from wine bars, pub gardens, tradesmen, boys from parks".

Not so picky in our desperate old age are we?

Please note. Intelligence is valued above perhaps anything else. Chat here. Friendship to start with.....

A good seeing to?

QUICK NOTE: I am primarily seeking a single/divorced man as I am seeking an LTR with possible marriage. BUT IF you are married and prepared to leave your wife at some point then I could still be interested. Thank you.

Once a schlapper always a schlapper I guess!

I wonder if she has thought of horses?

Now don't tell me: this ad was in the section "Bicycles for sale"!

:D

:lol:

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