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THIS IS LABOUR GOVERNMENT

REST OF THE WORLD VERSION:

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END

------------------------------------------------------------------------

LABOUR GOVERNMENT THE UK VERSION

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

A social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving.

The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.

The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so, while others have plenty.

The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house. The BBC, interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking news, broadcasts a multi-cultural choir singing 'We shall overcome'.

Ken Livingstone rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the squirrel got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his 'fair share' and increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London .

In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The squirrel's taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work. The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile. The squirrel's food is seized and re distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper.

Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home. The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they tried to blow up the airport because of Britain 's apparent love of dogs.

The cats had been arrested for the international offence of hijacking and attempted bombing but were immediately released because the police fed them pilchards instead of salmon whilst in custody. Initial moves to return them to their own country were abandoned, because it was feared they would face death by the mice. The cats devise and start a scam to obtain money from people's credit cards.

A Panorama special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the squirrel's food, though spring is still months away, while the council house he is in, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs. Inadequate government funding is blamed for the grasshoppers' drug 'illness'.

The cats seek recompense in the British courts for their treatment since arrival in UK .

The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is placed in the care of the probation service to monitor and supervise him.. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery.

A commission of enquiry, that will eventually cost £10,000,000 and state the obvious, is set up. Additional money is put into funding a drug rehabilitation scheme for

grasshoppers and legal aid for lawyers representing asylum seekers is increased. The government praises the asylum-seeking cats for enriching Britain 's multicultural diversity, and dogs are criticised by the government for failing to befriend the cats.

The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a government minister.

The cats are paid a million pounds each because their rights were infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in the United Kingdom .

The squirrel, the dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing, the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on their credit cards to cover losses. Their taxes are increased to pay for law and order, and they are told that they will have to work beyond 65 because of a shortfall in government funds.

THE END

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Guest P-Diddly
THIS IS LABOUR GOVERNMENT

REST OF THE WORLD VERSION:

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END

------------------------------------------------------------------------

LABOUR GOVERNMENT THE UK VERSION

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

A social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving.

The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.

The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so, while others have plenty.

The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house. The BBC, interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking news, broadcasts a multi-cultural choir singing 'We shall overcome'.

Ken Livingstone rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the squirrel got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his 'fair share' and increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London .

In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The squirrel's taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work. The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile. The squirrel's food is seized and re distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper.

Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home. The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they tried to blow up the airport because of Britain 's apparent love of dogs.

The cats had been arrested for the international offence of hijacking and attempted bombing but were immediately released because the police fed them pilchards instead of salmon whilst in custody. Initial moves to return them to their own country were abandoned, because it was feared they would face death by the mice. The cats devise and start a scam to obtain money from people's credit cards.

A Panorama special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the squirrel's food, though spring is still months away, while the council house he is in, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs. Inadequate government funding is blamed for the grasshoppers' drug 'illness'.

The cats seek recompense in the British courts for their treatment since arrival in UK .

The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is placed in the care of the probation service to monitor and supervise him.. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery.

A commission of enquiry, that will eventually cost £10,000,000 and state the obvious, is set up. Additional money is put into funding a drug rehabilitation scheme for

grasshoppers and legal aid for lawyers representing asylum seekers is increased. The government praises the asylum-seeking cats for enriching Britain 's multicultural diversity, and dogs are criticised by the government for failing to befriend the cats.

The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a government minister.

The cats are paid a million pounds each because their rights were infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in the United Kingdom .

The squirrel, the dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing, the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on their credit cards to cover losses. Their taxes are increased to pay for law and order, and they are told that they will have to work beyond 65 because of a shortfall in government funds.

THE END

It's not funny. It's why I left that fvcking sh1thole.

Left wing? Social justice? Kiss my fvcking ar$e!

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:lol:

In the real world though, the squirrel owns the fields and trees and rivers, and has paid some field mice to keep the grasshoppers out so they starve.

Funny how these moral parables nearly always leave that bit out

Still, within the framework it paints it makes moral sense.

Edited by Stars

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Quite right too, squirrels are just rats with good PR, poison the lot of the little b*stards I say.

Gray (American) ones are, not the reds though! Am I allowed to say that?

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Gray (American) ones are, not the reds though! Am I allowed to say that?

ummmm! You can't say that! You are a rascialist BNP loving, nazi sympathiser & I'm telling the police on you.

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:lol:

In the real world though, the squirrel owns the fields and trees and rivers, and has paid some field mice to keep the grasshoppers out so they starve.

Yes I suppose the bit about the squirrel's parents and grandparents working hard and saving to give young squirrel a good start in life only to see everything they worked for taken off them as they got older and died, could have been added on to the story and adds to the real world injustice but it's still a good illustration of the UK

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We must organise to fight thr Grayists, deny them a platform.

We need to meet them in fair & open debate and demolish their position with logic & reason, or just let them talk and condem themselves :rolleyes:

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Yes I suppose the bit about the squirrel's parents and grandparents working hard and saving to give young squirrel a good start in life only to see everything they worked for taken off them as they got older and died, could have been added on to the story and adds to the real world injustice but it's still a good illustration of the UK

I saw a children's film that was a sort of updated Jack & the Beanstalk. The modern Jack complains to the Court that he should not be punished for the actions of his ancestors. The Court agrees but raises the question as to whether he should profit from their wrongdoings.

It is a valid question. Society does concur that children should not be responsible for the actions of their parents, yet we object to inheritance tax.

p-o-p

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So its the poor who are the theives who stole all the wealth of the middle class?

Bolllocks! The sooner the underclass, the working poor and the middle class joined together to overthrow the real oppressors the better. Jealousy between the dole-bludgers and wage earners serves only to continue the rule of the super-rich landowning class.

Edited by Jie Bie

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The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grass hopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter he gets some mates together and they all go round to the squirrels house and take his nuts.

The state puts the grasshopper on an ASBO, and charges the squirrel for the work involved, as well as the other costs involved in supporting a member of society that has no cause or reason to work.

The grasshopper and his mates give the squirrel a serious kicking for being a grass. The state extends the grasshopper's ASBO by two months and charges the squirrel for the work involved.

The grass hopper gets a tattoo done of him jumping on the squirrel's head, with the words "Grass Hopper" below it.

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i wish it was THE END - will just have to sit it out until the GE.

Perhaps this time enough of the electorate will see them for what they are and utterly destroy them. The last Labour government. A man can dream.

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So its the poor who are the theives who stole all the wealth of the middle class?

Bolllocks! The sooner the underclass, the working poor and the middle class joined together to overthrow the real oppressors the better. Jealousy between the dole-bludgers and wage earners serves only to continue the rule of the super-rich landowning class.

Yes, disgraceful that toffs such as Tony Blair own six properties worth millions when the poeple who voted for him are being repossessed. But thats socialism for you

Edited by dr ray

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Yes, disgraceful that toffs such as Tony Blair own six properties worth millions when the poeple who voted for him are being repossessed. But thats socialism for you

That is indeed socialism. No more effective way of assuring the greatest poverty for the greatest number and widening the chasm between them and the elite.

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Yes, disgraceful that toffs such as Tony Blair own six properties worth millions when the poeple who voted for him are being repossessed. But thats socialism for you

Misses the point somewhat - i don't think he was defending tony blair

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Yes I suppose the bit about the squirrel's parents and grandparents working hard and saving to give young squirrel a good start in life only to see everything they worked for taken off them as they got older and died, could have been added on to the story and adds to the real world injustice but it's still a good illustration of the UK

No, working hard and saving nuts is fine. It's all the violent blocking of the grasshoper's usage of the trees and rivers that's problematic. It's absence in the story makes it weak (incomplete) as parable.

Edited by Stars

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That is indeed socialism. No more effective way of assuring the greatest poverty for the greatest number and widening the chasm between them and the elite.

Remember the old trade union reps song that tells you everything you need to know about socialists

Sung to the RED flag

The working class can kiss my ass I've got the foremans job at last.

Only Blair has a property portfolio

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Misses the point somewhat - i don't think he was defending tony blair

No, but I was trying to counter the belief that there is an aristocratic group that enslaves the rest of us.

The people with money and influence are the nouveau riche not some crusty country landowner with 5000 acres of farmland and a crumbling family seat he can barely afford to heat.

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No, but I was trying to counter the belief that there is an aristocratic group that enslaves the rest of us.

The people with money and influence are the nouveau riche not some crusty country landowner with 5000 acres of farmland and a crumbling family seat he can barely afford to heat.

The vast majority of multi millionaires become so predominantly via real estate -

The issue is bit more complex than you make out, land is still the ultimate source of injust inequality

Edited by Stars

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