interestrateripoff Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...past-years.html QUESTION: I've just discovered that my partner of six years has been faking orgasms throughout our relationship.I'm in shock that she could have lied to me for this long. She says she has experienced a climax only once, during sex with one of her former boyfriends, and can't explain why that was, but she insists she enjoys having sex with me. However, I feel devastated and am not sure I can carry on seeing her. ANSWER: I understand why you feel shocked and hurt. The natural first reaction is to feel as if your love life has been a charade. Modern romance has become distressingly target-orientated, with great emphasis in magazines and the media about how to achieve an orgasm, multiple orgasms or even the nearmythical 'continuous orgasm' (no, I've never had one nor have I met anyone who has). TV dramas and films perpetuate the ludicrous notion that couples find it easy to climax together in photogenic, breathy ecstasy. The inevitable result of all this talk of 'red hot sex' is that many people beat themselves up about falling short of orgasmic perfection. You clearly felt that part of your role as a lover was to deliver a plentiful supply of orgasms to your girlfriend and she clearly felt under equal pressure to achieve them- or why would she fake it for so long? What you see as lies, she probably viewed as vital measures to reassure you as a lover. If you can stop focusing on your wounded feelings, you will realise that clearly she has long been terrified about revealing what she sees as a fatal sexual flaw. I would bet my bottom dollar she was scared you would ditch her if she revealed her secret and now the cat's out of the bag you are threatening to do exactly that. Please don't! In other words, you may be feeling vulnerable and inadequate, but is it a patch on what she's felt for six years? Surely she's the most exposed person in this scenario. She has no complaint with you as a lover and says she's always enjoyed the sex you have together. If it were a matter of tactfully suggesting you change your technique, clearly she would have told you what buttons to push. You've both enjoyed your physical and emotional connection enough to last six years together, which is an endorsement of your mutual attraction and understanding. It would be ridiculous if you thought all that was invalidated because your girlfriend hasn't experienced an orgasm. After all, most of the women I know cite kissing and foreplay as the most erotic aspect of lovemaking. The truth is the female orgasm tends to be far more elusive and complex than the male variety. I watched a TV documentary on this subject a few years ago that featured a woman who could orgasm at will, just by thinking sexy thoughts, and another who'd never had a climax - no amount of sex therapy or practical advice seemed to rectify the problem Though stimulation of the clitoris is central to most women's experience of orgasm, I know those for whom a large element of fantasy is key. For some, it may be attainable only in certain positions, such as on top, where the woman controls the pace. It's not unusual for a woman to experience problems reaching a climax. Your girlfriend's difficulties admittedly sounds more entrenched than most, but that's surely because she's tried to conceal the problem, rather than talking to you or a qualified sex therapist. I'd recommend that she seeks professional advice on the matter -try the British Association for Sexual and Relationship Therapy website, basrt.org.uk So what advice would come from HPC to sort out this delicate problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Parry aka GOD Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 'ere you b1tch, 'ave yer ring back! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Skinty Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Send her to acting classes. She obviously wasn't convincing enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest X-QUORK Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'd buy one of those suction ***** enlargers for 200 quid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boomer! Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thats f*ck all!!!! Ive been faking an entire relationship for the past 6 years just to get an orgasm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest anorthosite Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thats f*ck all!!!! Ive been faking an entire relationship for the past 6 years just to get an orgasm A case of "talk to the hand" if ever I heard it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Parry aka GOD Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'd buy one of those suction ***** enlargers for 200 quid. Don't tell me you've broken another one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1929crash Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thats f*ck all!!!! Ive been faking an entire relationship for the past 6 years just to get an orgasm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patfig Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I'd withdraw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Parry aka GOD Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Right off to bed. I'll see you lovelies in a couple of weeks. Cheerio for now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Skinty Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 It's actually very reasonable advice from the daily mail agony aunt. It must have been such a drag have to fake it though. But then I suppose she probably saw it as helping her partner climax more effectively. She's probably hoping that she can read a book during sex now, not realising that it will kill the confidence of the man even more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KingCharles1st Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Get off to Dot Cotton were you Oooh Yeeerrrrr-- Imagine getting a suck from Dottie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indirectapproach Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Don't discount the possibility she was lying about faking. It's so much easier to lie than to fake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KingCharles1st Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 If you are going at it Doggie- you could always use the "carrot on stick" method- except dangle your credit card 6 inches in front of her nose.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patfig Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 If you are going at it Doggie- you could always use the "carrot on stick" method- except dangle your credit card 6 inches in front of her nose.. Rodeo style is better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swissy_fit Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Time for a bedtime story or two I reckon. Tongues have more than one use. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pyracantha Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Rodeo style is better What, one hand firmly gripping a leather leash? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patfig Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 What, one hand firmly gripping a leather leash? No, get your lovely lady on all fours, give her the full length of your manhood nice and deeply, then reach forward and cup her breasts while whispering softly into her ear, "they feel almost as good as yer sisters" and see how long you can stay on!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indirectapproach Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Is it easier to look your man in the eye and lie and say, "You have never made me orgasm." Or spend six years doing this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2zmwTZtThk And the worst stuff in this video is Ryan's hair and her table manners. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benthebuilder Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...past-years.htmlSo what advice would come from HPC to sort out this delicate problem. Whats his problem? So long as he's been getting off, why worry? And who the hell asks the Daily Wail agony aunt for sex advice? And boomers reply was too funny...bravo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Skinty Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Is it easier to look your man in the eye and lie and say,"You have never made me orgasm." Or spend six years doing this, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2zmwTZtThk And the worst stuff in this video is Ryan's hair and her table manners. It's probably easier to say for her to the man before they first have sex, look, you won't make me orgasm, no one can. So just get in there and enjoy yourself and let me enjoy it in my own way OK? But instead the man's probably thinking to himself, all those years of foreplay and for what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KingBingo Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Why care? Her: Owww, I've just faked an orgasm, Aren't I clever! Him: Yeah, well, I just came on your tits, and now I'm going to sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dances with sheeple Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 No, get your lovely lady on all fours, give her the full length of your manhood nice and deeply, then reach forward and cup her breasts while whispering softly into her ear, "they feel almost as good as yer sisters" and see how long you can stay on!! Oh Jesus ,that was definately a round for the keyboard moment. Might want to hide the kitchen knives before trying that one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enrieb Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...past-years.htmlSo what advice would come from HPC to sort out this delicate problem. Poor guy I feel sorry for him, she had me completely fooled too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pyracantha Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Poor guy I feel sorry for him, she had me completely fooled too. Jeez, how many of us was she keeping going? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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