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General Melchett

Withnail And I - An Allegory For Where We Are?

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Penfold (Governor BoE) swerves drunkenly through the economy. The electorate wakes up startled 'What are you doing!?'

Penfold: 'I'm making money!'

Ed Balls leers out of his ministerial jag window, waving his expenses claims at passersby 'So what!'

Electorate; 'Up yours, arsehole!'

Balls: 'Little tarts, they love it.'

Gordon removes his sunnies to reveal scary looking expression: 'I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. And if I spike you, you'll know you've been spoken to.'

HPC: The Uk is a country coming down from its trip. We are 91 days from the end of this HP bubble and there's going to be a lot of refugees.

Darling: Are you the IMF?

Broon: Shut up, I'll deal with this.

Darling: We've bankrupted the country by mistake. We're in this government building here. Are you the IMF?

Broon: Stop saying that Darling, of course he's the ******ing IMF!

Etc

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Darling: Are you the IMF?

Broon: Shut up, I'll deal with this.

Darling: We've bankrupted the country by mistake. We're in this government building here. Are you the IMF?

Broon: Stop saying that Darling, of course he's the ******ing IMF!

:lol::lol:

Electorate wakes to find Gordon rifling through their pockets in the middle of the night:

"Gordon! You terrible ****!!!"

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marwood03.jpg

The credit bubble is like endless shopping trips without ever having to pay a bill. New credit card, mortgage equity release. Your house goes up in value, you borrow more. Makes no difference so long as you keep piling up the debts. But sooner or later you've got to pay up because it's crashing, and then all at once the frozen debts melt out through the financial system and seep out the pores.

I like your thinking Melchy!

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Guest X-QUORK

Alistair: The QE I am about to start requires a craftsman and can utilise up to twelve printing presses. It is called Camberwell Easing.

Gordon: It's impossible to use twelve printing presses on one Easing.

Alistair: It is impossible to start Camberwell Easing with anything less.

Yvette: Who says it's Camberwell Easing?

Alistair: I do. I invented it in Camberwell and it looks like printy printy. This will tend to make you feel very rich.

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HPC TFHer: I don't advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.

HPC main forum member: These aren't accidents! They're THROWING themselves into the road gladly! THROWING themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness! Throw yourself into the road, darling! You haven't got a chance!

Rolf: There is, you'll agree, a certain 'je ne sais quoi' oh, so very special about a firm, young carrot. Mmmm, excuse me.

But back to the original theme:

Darling: I've some extremely distressing news.

Brown: I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear anything! Oh God, it's a nightmare, I tell you, it's a nightmare.

Darling: We just ran out of money. What are we gonna do about it?

Brown: I don't know, I don't know. Oh God, I don't feel good.

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HPC TFHer: I don't advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.

HPC main forum member: These aren't accidents! They're THROWING themselves into the road gladly! THROWING themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness! Throw yourself into the road, darling! You haven't got a chance!

Rolf: There is, you'll agree, a certain 'je ne sais quoi' oh, so very special about a firm, young carrot. Mmmm, excuse me.

But back to the original theme:

Darling: I've some extremely distressing news.

Brown: I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear anything! Oh God, it's a nightmare, I tell you, it's a nightmare.

Darling: We just ran out of money. What are we gonna do about it?

Brown: I don't know, I don't know. Oh God, I don't feel good.

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HPC TFHer: I don't advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.

HPC main forum member: These aren't accidents! They're THROWING themselves into the road gladly! THROWING themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness! Throw yourself into the road, darling! You haven't got a chance!

Rolf: There is, you'll agree, a certain 'je ne sais quoi' oh, so very special about a firm, young carrot. Mmmm, excuse me.

But back to the original theme:

Darling: I've some extremely distressing news.

Brown: I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear anything! Oh God, it's a nightmare, I tell you, it's a nightmare.

Darling: We just ran out of money. What are we gonna do about it?

Brown: I don't know, I don't know. Oh God, I don't feel good.

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]Alistair: The QE I am about to start requires a craftsman and can utilise up to twelve printing presses. It is called Camberwell Easing.

Gordon: It's impossible to use twelve printing presses on one Easing.

Alistair: It is impossible to start Camberwell Easing with anything less.

Yvette: Who says it's Camberwell Easing?

Alistair: I do. I invented it in Camberwell and it looks like printy printy. This will tend to make you feel very rich.

:lol::lol::lol:
The film Zulu perfectly represents life in the UK today.

Too relaxed and upbeat.

I was thinking more "Aguirre: Wrath of God" with Gorgon in Klaus Kinski's role, HPCers as the spider monkeys (or whatever those little furry ba5t4rds are), and a cameo for Injin, wandering about starkers with leaves on his head, insisting that he is a jaguar.

Which turned out to be the most sensible thing anybody said in the entire film :P

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