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Financial Pressure - People Splitting Up.

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Guest DisposableHeroes

Split the property, the finance, the children.

It must be a friggin nightmare.

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Split the property, the finance, the children.

It must be a friggin nightmare.

Not if you don't share a property, finance or children. ;)

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Split the property, the finance, the children.

It must be a friggin nightmare.

I`ve been through it twice,the first time however my lady was fair and we sorted everything between us then told the solicitor what sort of arrangement we wanted,just to have it on paper. (we are still friends 20 years on)

Second time yes it was a nightmare as she insisted on a solicitor,from the start....solicitors are combative from the beginning..

It was awful....she turned into a she devil...its amazing you think you know somebody,till tshtf.

Fortunately no kids involved...thank God.

Edited by tiggerthetiger

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Guest DisposableHeroes
I`ve been through it twice,the first time however my lady was fair and we sorted everything between us then told the solicitor what sort of arrangement we wanted,just to have it on paper. (we are still friends 20 years on)

Second time yes it was a nightmare as she insisted on a solicitor,from the start....solicitors are combative from the beginning..

It was awful....she turned into a she devil...its amazing you think you know somebody,till tshtf.

Fortunately no kids involved...thank God.

I hope things are going well for you now. Lucky not to get kids involved.

Life's tough enough as it is.

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I hope things are going well for you now. Lucky not to get kids involved.

Life's tough enough as it is.

Life is good now thanks...simple and good...divorce can bring out the worst in people.Normally sane and reasonably well balanced people turn into psychos..my 2nd ex took advice from all her female pals..the thing with women is they often have a huge network of friends to fall back on whereas a guy normally shacks up with Jack Daniels,

although I had a great friend to lean on.

The worst type of woman to get a divorce from is one with a victim mentality....

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Guest DisposableHeroes
Life is good now thanks...simple and good...divorce can bring out the worst in people.Normally sane and reasonably well balanced people turn into psychos..my 2nd ex took advice from all her female pals..the thing with women is they often have a huge network of friends to fall back on whereas a guy normally shacks up with Jack Daniels,

although I had a great friend to lean on.

The worst type of woman to get a divorce from is one with a victim mentality....

Glad to hear.

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Life is good now thanks...simple and good...

The worst type of woman to get a divorce from is one with a victim mentality....

I had to do this very thing. Problem is good victims also cycle through to make good bullies, then switch back again.

Here is my story- posted before.

Mrs SG made off with the house and all the equity in the house in the summer of 2006. The house was valued at 300k, mortgage 230k. Her IFA got her a mortgage with NR I have just found out. I suspect they got an Eric Liar Loan, classifying the maintenance I give her (2k monthly) as a salary.

The six thousand pounds she has put into the endowment policy which is to pay off the capital is now two thousand.

Will she have problems when it comes to reset time?

I offered to pay 50% of a repayment mortgage on the house underwriting the whole lot ( I am a surgeon), subject to retaining a 50% charge on the profit but she refused, wanting her payday. Now she can't get enough of me.

I gave my greedy ex all the equity at the peak, knowing it would all go pete tong.

I've been saying for three years that the property market would crash, and endured the usual replies experienced by other hpcers posted extensively in this forum.

The trick is to offset the equity against things you really want or can use.

We bought in 2000 and "made " 100k.

The mortgage was 230k on a joint income of 140k-she called this “ a financial crisis- we’d better continue with the divorceâ€. We would have been mortgage free at age 51 and 49. What a genius!

Her whole family is riddled with greed.

Mother in-law refused to sell 500k home in London (Northwood) a couple of years ago-"Why sell, I made fifty grand last year just doing nothing?â€

At 70 , she will have trouble liquidating now.

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I had to do this very thing. Problem is good victims also cycle through to make good bullies, then switch back again.

Here is my story- posted before.

Mrs SG made off with the house and all the equity in the house in the summer of 2006. The house was valued at 300k, mortgage 230k. Her IFA got her a mortgage with NR I have just found out. I suspect they got an Eric Liar Loan, classifying the maintenance I give her (2k monthly) as a salary.

The six thousand pounds she has put into the endowment policy which is to pay off the capital is now two thousand.

Will she have problems when it comes to reset time?

I offered to pay 50% of a repayment mortgage on the house underwriting the whole lot ( I am a surgeon), subject to retaining a 50% charge on the profit but she refused, wanting her payday. Now she can't get enough of me.

I gave my greedy ex all the equity at the peak, knowing it would all go pete tong.

I've been saying for three years that the property market would crash, and endured the usual replies experienced by other hpcers posted extensively in this forum.

The trick is to offset the equity against things you really want or can use.

We bought in 2000 and "made " 100k.

The mortgage was 230k on a joint income of 140k-she called this “ a financial crisis- we’d better continue with the divorceâ€. We would have been mortgage free at age 51 and 49. What a genius!

Her whole family is riddled with greed.

Mother in-law refused to sell 500k home in London (Northwood) a couple of years ago-"Why sell, I made fifty grand last year just doing nothing?â€

At 70 , she will have trouble liquidating now.

What does the 70 year old hope to spend her money on? A golden coffin?

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I had to do this very thing. Problem is good victims also cycle through to make good bullies, then switch back again.

Here is my story- posted before.

Mrs SG made off with the house and all the equity in the house in the summer of 2006. The house was valued at 300k,

I gave my greedy ex all the equity at the peak, knowing it would all go pete tong.

I remember reading your story Surgeon.It rung many bells with me.!...I wanted to walk away and leave the house to my ex.....she was not happy with that and seemed to think I had thousands salted away..in the end she was shown the cold light of day by my solicitor telling hers that we would fight for everything we could get unless she stopped all the silliness...

Her solicitor saw sense and informed my ex accordingly. (in 2001)

My ex sold the house late 07.! more through luck than judgement...she could not keep up the payments on the small mortgage that was only £17,000 when I left her,but I believe she MEW`d a couple of times up until 07, when she sold for £96,000.

The thing that makes me smile is that I know any money she walked away with will be spent within a few years if it is not already...... ;)

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The thing that makes me smile is that I know any money she walked away with will be spent within a few years if it is not already...... ;)

Yep, the equity I gave her has gone.

I advised her to sell at the top-being a nice guy- and she ignored me.

I now rent a huge house for the same she pays in interest.

ROFLMAO!

Nick

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Yep, the equity I gave her has gone.

I advised her to sell at the top-being a nice guy- and she ignored me.

I now rent a huge house for the same she pays in interest.

ROFLMAO!

Nick

Update: Courtesy of Rightmove an identical house on the same road guide price 229k.

Valuation at time of divorce-300k.

Nick

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Been there too.

Apparently 'amicable' separation then knock at the door of my rented apartment one morning, very friendly sounding guy who I'd never met but who knew my first name. He put his hand out to shake mine and when I offered mine he served papers on me.

Ex wouldn't talk to me directly thereafter, insisting I only dealt with her bitch of a lawyer. I sent everything back to the lawyer with a "f*ck you" letter.

Best thing I ever did was not to play into their 'frame'.

Best advice I can give to anyone in similar circumstances is assume ex is the absolute enemy from day one, 'cause they are whether you realise that or not, never play their 'game', cut your losses and move on.

Fortunately my kids are now young adults so I can deal with them directly.

I shall never marry again, would recommend no man marries without an enforceable pre-nup and if they do they keep their earnings, assets, pension, everything entirely separate, protected and ring-fenced.

It would not be possible to lose via a housing crash, a stockmarket crash or via any other means I can think of as much as I lost via divorce.

Snakes with tits. You have been warned.

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Just split with my second missus and told her she could keep everything (we have a $50K mortgage in the US-house worth $400K). I did the same more or less with the first as I couldn't stand the hassle. First wife left me for a Scouser to make matters worse but he ditched her when the dough ran out. No more for me-I have lifted the white flag. I have a rented apartment, do what I want and main thing I have peace. I suppose it's none of the naggin, but just miss the baggin sometimes.

IMHO Womens Lib or whatever has sold out the women. My first wife went from the nicest human being to Crazy Horse in a couple of months.

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Been there too.

Apparently 'amicable' separation then knock at the door of my rented apartment one morning, very friendly sounding guy who I'd never met but who knew my first name. He put his hand out to shake mine and when I offered mine he served papers on me.

Ex wouldn't talk to me directly thereafter, insisting I only dealt with her bitch of a lawyer. I sent everything back to the lawyer with a "f*ck you" letter.

Best thing I ever did was not to play into their 'frame'.

Best advice I can give to anyone in similar circumstances is assume ex is the absolute enemy from day one, 'cause they are whether you realise that or not, never play their 'game', cut your losses and move on.

Fortunately my kids are now young adults so I can deal with them directly.

I shall never marry again, would recommend no man marries without an enforceable pre-nup and if they do they keep their earnings, assets, pension, everything entirely separate, protected and ring-fenced.

It would not be possible to lose via a housing crash, a stockmarket crash or via any other means I can think of as much as I lost via divorce.

Snakes with tits. You have been warned.

Kharma

I always knew I liked you mate. I agree 100%. I can wash, iron cook and clean. I can pay for the rest.

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There is absolutely nothing rational about the way some women behave when divorcing.....nothing at all !!

I read somewhere it`s physiological.A woman may come out better off financially...the problem with them is they FEEL like they are losing everything and cannot handle it.

Men make it too easy for them and play into their hands.Women can often appear the victim,because they talk about it all so much and ilicit sympathy from all and sundry..yet it`s the guy who often bottles it all up and suffers longer and deeper !

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Just split with my second missus and told her she could keep everything (we have a $50K mortgage in the US-house worth $400K). I did the same more or less with the first as I couldn't stand the hassle. First wife left me for a Scouser to make matters worse but he ditched her when the dough ran out. No more for me-I have lifted the white flag. I have a rented apartment, do what I want and main thing I have peace. I suppose it's none of the naggin, but just miss the baggin sometimes.

IMHO Womens Lib or whatever has sold out the women. My first wife went from the nicest human being to Crazy Horse in a couple of months.

I'm with you RK and TW. Learn atraction and seduction techniques to get what you want but don't co-hab or marry.

Marriage is now an unfair contract where she can run off with your best friend, take your children, and you still lose everything financially.

Did anyone notice the recent judgement enforcing prenuptual agreements?

While it may go to appeal, the judge found it unfair that a contract should be voided by an event ( marriage). The sanctity of contracts being fundamental to civil law.

This was a case bought by a German woman, who, in preserving her families vast fortune, just ratted out all the other women and betrayed them, closing the door on goldiggers-period (no pun intended).

You couldn't make it up!

Nick

Edited by SurgeonGeneral

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I divorced in 2002. Cost me next to nowt. Never believe lawyers; they have a vested interest in keeping the divorce machine going. My tactic was - fast peddle up front to ensure your assets are protected; slow peddle thereafter; when my ex realised that my threat to spend the entire "estate" on legal fees was not a bluff, they backed down. Mention Article 1 of the European Convention on Human Rights - puts the willies up em.............

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All this cheery talk has triggered "Chinese brides" and "personal injury" on the Google adverts.

LOL

I see the Chinese brides but no personal injury. Do you have to select a bride first?

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All this cheery talk has triggered "Chinese brides" and "personal injury" on the Google adverts.

:lol::lol::lol:

Im gonna get me another bride...I know, I will just pop the keys to my house in a letter.....it will save me all the hassle of getting married in the first place ! :P

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I was chatting with a couple I know last week, both counsellors who have been on holiday, and did not wish to return to work this week as they are swamped with people getting divorced due to the recession - contrary to media reports about people sticking together during the recession - and they were saying that several of the divorces are very nasty indeed.

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Perhaps this thread should be merged with the one started a few months ago by a young lady, who was wondering why men in her age group are not willing to commit to marriage.

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Perhaps this thread should be merged with the one started a few months ago by a young lady, who was wondering why men in her age group are not willing to commit to marriage.

What was her age group ?

18-50 :rolleyes:

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http://www.womensinfidelity.com/

Women's relationships today follow

a very predictable pattern:

They push men for commitment

They get what they want

They lose interest in sex

They become attracted to someone else

They start cheating

They become angry and resentful

They begin telling their partners that they need time apart

They blame their partners for their behavior...and eventually, after making themselves and everyone around them miserable for an indefinite, but usually, long period of time, they end their relationships or marriages.

If you're a male, like most other males, you would probably never suspect that your partner is cheating, not only because of your wife’s or girlfriend’s seeming disinterest in sex; but also because you have the belief that your wife or girlfriend is a “good girl.†Unfortunately, males are frequently left/divorced by their wives and girlfriends without ever knowing about their wives' and girlfriends' infidelities.

If you’re a female, like most other females, prior to cheating on your partner you always proclaimed yourself to be "not the type" who would ever cheat. However, also like most other females, after they have cheated, you're shocked and appalled by your behavior; but at the same time you can't stop cheating.

Women's relationships and marriages will continue to follow this same pattern unless we develop an accurate understanding of females ─ particularly in regard to their sexuality. In fact, after researching women's sexuality for more than ten years, I can honestly say that most of our societal beliefs about females are grossly distorted and many are completely erroneous.

The media has finally begun to acknowledge, albeit to a small degree, the widespread problem of female infidelity. Recently, several books and articles have attempted to explain why women are now cheating as much as men. However, none were successful in their attempt. All of them left out very important pieces to this extremely complicated puzzle. I believe the majority were simply unable to find all of the information necessary to figure out the problem. Although, I'm certain that some were just afraid to disclose certain key pieces of information because the truth, quite frankly, is so contrary to our current beliefs. Unfortunately, without these missing pieces, it's impossible to understand, and to subsequently fix, the real problem occurring in relationships today.

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