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"britain's (utterly) Hopeless Romantics: Uk Men Just Don't Impress"

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...nt-impress.html

Britain's (utterly) hopeless romantics: UK men just don't impress

If he runs you a soothing bath after a hard day or leaves sweet little love notes around the house, he's a real romantic.

But probably not British. According to scientists, British men are among the least romantic in the world. They are less likely to pay compliments, be inspired to write love poetry or take their loved ones away for surprise holidays than their foreign counterparts.

And even when they try really hard to impress a woman British men usually get it wrong. They labour under the mistaken belief that women regard gifts of sexy lingerie or anything really expensive as the height of romance. And of course, they then buy accordingly. Instead, women prefer those little loving touches, such as a morning cup of tea in bed or a gentle shoulder rub. Or that longed-for hot bath. They don't cost a thing.

The findings come from a study of 6,500 men and women all over the world carried out by psychologist Professor Richard Wiseman.

'Contrary to what many men believe, you do not have to spend large sums of money to woo a woman - it really is the thought that counts,' he said. 'Women seem especially attracted to acts of escapism and surprise, whereas blatant displays of materialism, such as buying them sexy underwear or cosmetic surgery, scored very badly.'

The study, carried out at the University of Hertfordshire, showed a worrying trend for the hearts and flowers brigade - romance appears to be dying out. Fifty two per cent of women said their partners had never run them a warm bath after a hard day while 45 per cent had never been offered a coat when shivering.

Fifty-three per cent had never experienced the thrill of being whisked away for an exciting weekend. British men did particularly badly. They were up to 10 per cent less likely to make romantic gestures than men from other countries.

Only 32 per cent of British men had written a song or poem about their current partner, compared to 41 per cent of non-British men. And only 44 per cent of British men had taken their partners on a surprise break, compared to 51 per cent of men overseas. In a separate section of the study, Professor Wiseman asked men to say how romantic they thought a woman would find a series of gifts or gestures.

At the same time, women were asked how romantic they rated each action. And it was no surprise that they were remarkably at odds with each other. 'The men severely underestimated the romantic value of almost all the acts,' said Professor Wiseman.

'Men don't seem to realise the psychological impact of small romantic gestures. Women like them because they show men are into them and thinking of them rather than themselves.'

Around 40 per cent of the women rated the suggestion 'cover her eyes and lead her to a lovely surprise' as one of the top romantic gestures. But only 22 per cent of men did the same. Only 11 per cent of men - compared with 25 per cent of women - awarded the maximum score to the item 'tell her that she is the most wonderful woman in the world'.

And just 8 per cent of men, but 22 per cent of women, gave top marks to 'run her a relaxing bath after she has had a bad day at work'. Professor Wiseman said there was a science to keeping romance alive - a claim he said was backed up by a body of scientific literature. 'It's important to try new things,' he explained.

'Long-term couples are often more attracted to each other when they regularly engage in novel and exciting joint activities, especially when they involve working together to achieve a goal. And you should stay positive. There's a formula for long-term success in a relationship - give your partner five compliments for every piece of criticism. 'And if you're going to highlight faults, qualify them with a "but".

'So next time you want to tell your partner they never do the washing up, add a 'but you do make me laugh' or a 'but your cooking's amazing'.

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Makes sense. Never underestimate the small things. Actually, come to think of it a hot bath is a good way to relax and relieve stress...

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Makes sense. Never underestimate the small things. Actually, come to think of it a hot bath is a good way to relax and relieve stress...

Got something you want to admit to? ;)

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Got something you want to admit to? ;)

Damn it, I knew there was something dodgy about that sentence :lol:

Seriously though, stop with the out of context stuff :P I was referring to back rubs etc. Not genitalia... :blink:

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Guest Skinty

These kind of articles from the Daily Wail are all rather artificial really. What men and women really want are a long term loving companion that will be there to support them, they can share activities with and relate to. Any romantic gesture will naturally happen in a good healthy relationship. If they stop then it's because you have started taking each other for granted.

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These kind of articles from the Daily Wail are all rather artificial really. What men and women really want are a long term loving companion that will be there to support them, they can share activities with and relate to. Any romantic gesture will naturally happen in a good healthy relationship. If they stop then it's because you have started taking each other for granted.

I agree with you there, Skinty. Out of interest, what got you into computing as far as Linux, I don't see many women in this field :P

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Most of 'em don't really want romance. What they want is somebody who knows what they are doing between the sheets. Anecdotal evidence suggests to me that the majority of UK men don't impress in that respect either....

It takes 2 to tango

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Guest theboltonfury
It takes 2 to tango

My wife went out earlier and I can assure you it only took 1.

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Guest Skinty
I agree with you there, Skinty. Out of interest, what got you into computing as far as Linux, I don't see many women in this field :P

During A-levels I went for the soft subjects and didn't get on with them very well at all. They were all infuriatingly wishy-washy and I couldn't accept the doctrine. In hindsight I should have originally chosen the natural sciences as I had found them fascinating when revising for my GSCE's. I stayed on an extra year and decided to give computing a try because I had been fascinated by the philosophical issues surrounding Artificial Intelligence since reading a book on it at 14. I realised that I wanted to work in a young field where it was possible to pioneer new ideas. I found that I was rather good at programming though. It was fun being able to build things and seeing them work.

Not that I wanted to specifically do a computing degree, I wanted to do Artificial Intelligence. But obscure subjects at degree level still weren't that common at the time. A lecturer at an open day convinced me that Computing Science would provide me with a good basis for further study. I concentrated on AI in my final year but none of my questions were answered. I managed to get more answers from Artificial Life, evolutionary and adaptive systems, and then even more from Computational Neuroscience. Now I am learning more about natural self organising systems.

I see computing as just a way of implementing things. I'd ideally love to build complex adaptive systems with real physical objects such as living cells.

Incidentally I'm really excited today as my first journal paper has been accepted!

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During A-levels I went for the soft subjects and didn't get on with them very well at all. They were all infuriatingly wishy-washy and I couldn't accept the doctrine. In hindsight I should have originally chosen the natural sciences as I had found them fascinating when revising for my GSCE's. I stayed on an extra year and decided to give computing a try because I had been fascinated by the philosophical issues surrounding Artificial Intelligence since reading a book on it at 14. I realised that I wanted to work in a young field where it was possible to pioneer new ideas. I found that I was rather good at programming though. It was fun being able to build things and seeing them work.

Not that I wanted to specifically do a computing degree, I wanted to do Artificial Intelligence. But obscure subjects at degree level still weren't that common at the time. A lecturer at an open day convinced me that Computing Science would provide me with a good basis for further study. I concentrated on AI in my final year but none of my questions were answered. I managed to get more answers from Artificial Life, evolutionary and adaptive systems, and then even more from Computational Neuroscience. Now I am learning more about natural self organising systems.

I see computing as just a way of implementing things. I'd ideally love to build complex adaptive systems with real physical objects such as living cells.

Incidentally I'm really excited today as my first journal paper has been accepted!

Cool, well done :)

Unfortunately I can't say the same for myself (the success part that is)...come to think of it that would make me somewhat hypocritical in this thread. :lol:

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It takes 2 to tango

I'd argue that that is a false analogy. The two who tango are equally responsible for the result but the same does not apply in this case. Sure, if a woman is repressed or thinks certain acts are "disgusting" and won't do them then its a problem which probably can't be solved, but for a man to do his bit, a little more is required in the way of imagination, technique and stamina.

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Incidentally I'm really excited today as my first journal paper has been accepted!

Congratulations!

An interesting insight into the world of IT.

I do a lot of 3 on the list. Just finished one off this week ('Holiday Romance'). Though I think it would be harder to do it in a 'live' relationship. Angst is bad - and good.

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...nt-impress.html

Britain's (utterly) hopeless romantics: UK men just don't impress

If he runs you a soothing bath after a hard day or leaves sweet little love notes around the house, he's a real romantic.

But probably not British. According to scientists, British men are among the least romantic in the world. They are less likely to pay compliments, be inspired to write love poetry or take their loved ones away for surprise holidays than their foreign counterparts.

And even when they try really hard to impress a woman British men usually get it wrong. They labour under the mistaken belief that women regard gifts of sexy lingerie or anything really expensive as the height of romance. And of course, they then buy accordingly. Instead, women prefer those little loving touches, such as a morning cup of tea in bed or a gentle shoulder rub. Or that longed-for hot bath. They don't cost a thing.

The findings come from a study of 6,500 men and women all over the world carried out by psychologist Professor Richard Wiseman.

'Contrary to what many men believe, you do not have to spend large sums of money to woo a woman - it really is the thought that counts,' he said. 'Women seem especially attracted to acts of escapism and surprise, whereas blatant displays of materialism, such as buying them sexy underwear or cosmetic surgery, scored very badly.'

The study, carried out at the University of Hertfordshire, showed a worrying trend for the hearts and flowers brigade - romance appears to be dying out. Fifty two per cent of women said their partners had never run them a warm bath after a hard day while 45 per cent had never been offered a coat when shivering.

Fifty-three per cent had never experienced the thrill of being whisked away for an exciting weekend. British men did particularly badly. They were up to 10 per cent less likely to make romantic gestures than men from other countries.

Only 32 per cent of British men had written a song or poem about their current partner, compared to 41 per cent of non-British men. And only 44 per cent of British men had taken their partners on a surprise break, compared to 51 per cent of men overseas. In a separate section of the study, Professor Wiseman asked men to say how romantic they thought a woman would find a series of gifts or gestures.

At the same time, women were asked how romantic they rated each action. And it was no surprise that they were remarkably at odds with each other. 'The men severely underestimated the romantic value of almost all the acts,' said Professor Wiseman.

'Men don't seem to realise the psychological impact of small romantic gestures. Women like them because they show men are into them and thinking of them rather than themselves.'

Around 40 per cent of the women rated the suggestion 'cover her eyes and lead her to a lovely surprise' as one of the top romantic gestures. But only 22 per cent of men did the same. Only 11 per cent of men - compared with 25 per cent of women - awarded the maximum score to the item 'tell her that she is the most wonderful woman in the world'.

And just 8 per cent of men, but 22 per cent of women, gave top marks to 'run her a relaxing bath after she has had a bad day at work'. Professor Wiseman said there was a science to keeping romance alive - a claim he said was backed up by a body of scientific literature. 'It's important to try new things,' he explained.

'Long-term couples are often more attracted to each other when they regularly engage in novel and exciting joint activities, especially when they involve working together to achieve a goal. And you should stay positive. There's a formula for long-term success in a relationship - give your partner five compliments for every piece of criticism. 'And if you're going to highlight faults, qualify them with a "but".

'So next time you want to tell your partner they never do the washing up, add a 'but you do make me laugh' or a 'but your cooking's amazing'.

Yet another one of these stupid articles encouraging women to think they are hard done by. When was the last time you read a similar article but attacking women?

Why doesn't romance go both ways? It all seems to me about brainwashing men to run around after women.

And what's all that rubbish about being offered a coat when you're freezing :unsure: It's like, get your own coat, what are you a damn retard? :lol:

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Guest AuntJess
During A-levels I went for the soft subjects and didn't get on with them very well at all. They were all infuriatingly wishy-washy and I couldn't accept the doctrine. In hindsight I should have originally chosen the natural sciences as I had found them fascinating when revising for my GSCE's. I stayed on an extra year and decided to give computing a try because I had been fascinated by the philosophical issues surrounding Artificial Intelligence since reading a book on it at 14. I realised that I wanted to work in a young field where it was possible to pioneer new ideas. I found that I was rather good at programming though. It was fun being able to build things and seeing them work.

Not that I wanted to specifically do a computing degree, I wanted to do Artificial Intelligence. But obscure subjects at degree level still weren't that common at the time. A lecturer at an open day convinced me that Computing Science would provide me with a good basis for further study. I concentrated on AI in my final year but none of my questions were answered. I managed to get more answers from Artificial Life, evolutionary and adaptive systems, and then even more from Computational Neuroscience. Now I am learning more about natural self organising systems.

I see computing as just a way of implementing things. I'd ideally love to build complex adaptive systems with real physical objects such as living cells.

Incidentally I'm really excited today as my first journal paper has been accepted!

Congratulations! I was never very hot at computing so I am in awe of those who can excel. ^_^

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Guest AuntJess
Yet another one of these stupid articles encouraging women to think they are hard done by. When was the last time you read a similar article but attacking women?

Why doesn't romance go both ways? It all seems to me about brainwashing men to run around after women.

And what's all that rubbish about being offered a coat when you're freezing :unsure: It's like, get your own coat, what are you a damn retard? :lol:

Treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen, eh? ;)

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-...nt-impress.html

Britain's (utterly) hopeless romantics: UK men just don't impress

If he runs you a soothing bath after a hard day or leaves sweet little love notes around the house, he's a real romantic.

But probably not British. According to scientists, British men are among the least romantic in the world. They are less likely to pay compliments, be inspired to write love poetry or take their loved ones away for surprise holidays than their foreign counterparts.

And even when they try really hard to impress a woman British men usually get it wrong. They labour under the mistaken belief that women regard gifts of sexy lingerie or anything really expensive as the height of romance. And of course, they then buy accordingly. Instead, women prefer those little loving touches, such as a morning cup of tea in bed or a gentle shoulder rub. Or that longed-for hot bath. They don't cost a thing.

The findings come from a study of 6,500 men and women all over the world carried out by psychologist Professor Richard Wiseman.

'Contrary to what many men believe, you do not have to spend large sums of money to woo a woman - it really is the thought that counts,' he said. 'Women seem especially attracted to acts of escapism and surprise, whereas blatant displays of materialism, such as buying them sexy underwear or cosmetic surgery, scored very badly.'

The study, carried out at the University of Hertfordshire, showed a worrying trend for the hearts and flowers brigade - romance appears to be dying out. Fifty two per cent of women said their partners had never run them a warm bath after a hard day while 45 per cent had never been offered a coat when shivering.

Fifty-three per cent had never experienced the thrill of being whisked away for an exciting weekend. British men did particularly badly. They were up to 10 per cent less likely to make romantic gestures than men from other countries.

Only 32 per cent of British men had written a song or poem about their current partner, compared to 41 per cent of non-British men. And only 44 per cent of British men had taken their partners on a surprise break, compared to 51 per cent of men overseas. In a separate section of the study, Professor Wiseman asked men to say how romantic they thought a woman would find a series of gifts or gestures.

At the same time, women were asked how romantic they rated each action. And it was no surprise that they were remarkably at odds with each other. 'The men severely underestimated the romantic value of almost all the acts,' said Professor Wiseman.

'Men don't seem to realise the psychological impact of small romantic gestures. Women like them because they show men are into them and thinking of them rather than themselves.'

Around 40 per cent of the women rated the suggestion 'cover her eyes and lead her to a lovely surprise' as one of the top romantic gestures. But only 22 per cent of men did the same. Only 11 per cent of men - compared with 25 per cent of women - awarded the maximum score to the item 'tell her that she is the most wonderful woman in the world'.

And just 8 per cent of men, but 22 per cent of women, gave top marks to 'run her a relaxing bath after she has had a bad day at work'. Professor Wiseman said there was a science to keeping romance alive - a claim he said was backed up by a body of scientific literature. 'It's important to try new things,' he explained.

'Long-term couples are often more attracted to each other when they regularly engage in novel and exciting joint activities, especially when they involve working together to achieve a goal. And you should stay positive. There's a formula for long-term success in a relationship - give your partner five compliments for every piece of criticism. 'And if you're going to highlight faults, qualify them with a "but".

'So next time you want to tell your partner they never do the washing up, add a 'but you do make me laugh' or a 'but your cooking's amazing'.

I do all of these things, i must be the 'perfect man' :lol::lol:

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Treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen, eh? ;)

I wouldn't go quite that far, although there's certainly something to it :)

I believe in fairness and equality. I don't see why the man should have to run around showering gifts/treats on the woman in the name of romance. If the woman returns the gestures then great, that's how it should be, but these articles are a bit one-sided and whiny.

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