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Recession? No, It's Just A Turndown

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http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/blog/20...an/16/recession

I heard a brilliant new euphemism for the recession today – just in the nick of time for ministers trying desperately to put a brave face on what looks like another whopping banking crisis brewing.

We soon became wearily familiar with "economic challenges" as an alternative to the R word. Then, as things got worse, the government settled on "downturn" (sounds a bit depressing, but not as bad as recession).

But my ears pricked up when Roger Carr, the chairman of Centrica and Cadbury's, referred, in an interview on the BBC's Today programme, to the "turndown".

Hitherto, the word has mostly been associated with posh hotels offering a service consisting largely of folding the bedsheets back a bit and putting a chocolate on the pillow.

I thought it was a malapropism, but no – a bit of quick Googling suggests the word is in use in corporate America.

Genius: at a stroke, the recession suddenly sounds warm, snuggly and as though it might involve complimentary mints.

How long can it be before Peter Mandelson starts using it?

Perhaps this can be the govt's progression from the downturn then becomes a turndown?

Although a turnbrown works as well, and I think gives the impression that we are well and truly in the shit.

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Bloke in pub A: "Did you get accepted for your new mortgage?"

Bloke in pub B: "No, it was a turndown due to the downturn, I'm afraid"

Sounds more like a Turd Noun to me

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Guest sillybear2

I like that new euphemism, it's easily confused for the rather more appropriate "shake down", which is of course just what the banksters are doing to the tax payer.

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Guest theboltonfury
Perhaps I can suggest a new euphemism:

Fool in denial = Corporate chairman.

I thought chocolate sales were meant to be OK. Fatties will be fat what ever the economic climates. Nothing stops them stuffing their big fat heads, not even Global Economic Meltdown

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  • 284 Brexit, House prices and Summer 2020

    1. 1. Including the effects Brexit, where do you think average UK house prices will be relative to now in June 2020?


      • down 5% +
      • down 2.5%
      • Even
      • up 2.5%
      • up 5%



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