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You Stupid Bastard

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Everything posted by You Stupid Bastard

  1. The bottom will hit when I say so. I set the target and the ONS has to hit it.
  2. You're all talking nonsense. I've created half a million jobs in government and plan to create another 300,000 in the next four years. I've presided over the lowest interest rates since the Great Depression, the highest rate of debt ever, the biggest boom in housing ever, the biggest boom in the stock market ever, the lowest inflation across the globe and the longest period of slow growth as started by the Tories and I can commend this to the house.
  3. Loo Lady is right! The harder you work the more tax you have to pay. It's only fair as they're obviously Scabs. In fact they DON'T work harder, they're just lucky is all. In fact that's not trrue either. I was standing in the queue at Tescos and realised I didn't have enough cash. Then I realised why! There was a wealthy person in front of me. So I hit him over the head and took his money and then I had enough. So you see! It was his fault all along that I hadn't enough! In fact you should be asking 'why is it unfair for me to sleep with your attactive wife when she's obviously not as ugly as mine?' People who can't be bothered to get out of work should get the most benefit from the welfare system. They should be encouraged to smoke, drink and take drugs to excess and have at least 20 brats to commit crimes on a daily basis. When they grown up they can then vomit on the streets after an all night binge. Yep! 22% of a small income is indeed going to hurt more, just as big is bigger than small. In fact poor people might even have to get out of bed. Gouging out the eyes of rich people should indeed be welcomed. In fact it's not good enough. Anyone driving an expensive car should be dragged out and flogged as they're obvioulsy Flaunters. I welcome any beautiful people being disfigured for life. I welcome tall people having their legs cut off. I welcome thin people being force-fed. What a brilliant way of getting even with hard-working, intelligent, tall and attractive people.
  4. Hello children! Remember Blunkett's one-crime-initiative-a-week? Well now it's my turn on smokescreen duty. Today's red herring announcement on taxes is the proposal to change inheritance tax. Remember that the inheritance tax threshold hasn't been increased up until now. Now the proposal is to belatedly raise the 40% bracket BUT introduce a 22% for the old threshold AND a 50% bracket too. So what's actually happening is a new band is introduced below and above the existing band which has been moved up. But this is a good day to hide bad news behind a daily announcement of new tax proposals including this: http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americ...sp?story=554533 which is just a distraction for this: http://www.informationclearinghouse.info/article5365.htm On no account however, should you look at what's happening in Najaf and any journalists still in Iraq will get a gun in their face and told to sod off.
  5. That's correct long term rates are indeed pu gnivom eb ot mees secirp dnob. Yes and in future they'll cut out the middle man and import all their own goods. 'Look! inflation!' they say, 'Quick! buy depreciating assets before they all depreciate to nothing'. Yes the rate of depreciation is rated at below or above the depreciating long and term short differences of the lower rate above the top. Yes! Indeed! The longer shorts of rate terms if up then down the inflation road wold the needyflous ratingcombinationious. However, the impropotuniousitiflow would incompetenuiously compromisationally overflow the pertuniousnous.
  6. Lurker at the Pleasure Dome, you're so right! That is why I took a degree in History to become Chancellor of the Exchequer. As we all know the past is a guide to the future. If you don' t know your history, you're doomed to repeat the past mistakes. Major swings always happen in pairs unless they're by themselves in which case they happen in threes, fives or nines unless they're doubled up in which case they're fours. Here's what I predict will happen next. There will be a net loss of jobs in America over the presidential term and Herbert Hoover will announce that recovery is just around the corner. Franklin Delano Roosevelt will be elected president and he will say that we have nothing to fear but fear itself. He will then make it illegal to own gold but legal to drink booze again. Then he will implement the New Deal. After that Hitler will become chancellor of Germany by burning down the Reichstag and blaming it on communist insurgents. Soon he'll invade the Sudetenland in a pre-emptive strike. Chamberlain will go and have a chat with him and come back on those new fangled propeller air-liners declaring peace in our time. Then we have World War 2 all over again. The Nobel metal will then be used for peace prizes though not in its gaseous form as a noble gas 'cos it's too difficult to weigh and the banks made of gold have played this speculative card as a joker to trump your aces. However, the salt era is a worry because you'll have people pinching your dinner. It'll be in the headlines 'Man mugged whilst eating Fish and Chips' and Fish and Chip shops will have a vault where the salt is stored. The Gold/Dow ratio is as you say there and the message, as you say has been sent with the CRB index fully switched on. The 20 year swing will break as the ropes get old and the five year cresting period will be up for its service soon so that will be out of commission too. This means gold will hit $4000 a troy ounce. Well I'm off to Switzerland. I've got my gas mask I'll be off until D-Day but don't tell the Germans about that one.
  7. Those struggling with debt should do what I do! Increase taxes on anything that moves, increase the amount you borrow and shift as much as you can off the books, import cheap labour by imposing a minimum wage and fiddling visa applications, whilst 'employing' everyone on incapacity benefit, higher education and government paper-shuffling, double the rate at which you print money by fiddling the basket of goods that form the CPI and which determine interest rates, and sell off half the nation's gold for a handful of magic beans. It's easy! Why can't you stupid people do the same?
  8. I'd go for property over equity every time. Take the equity out of your property and buy some property. You just can't miss.
  9. I accidentally clicked on Conservative. Can someone please change my vote before the next election, or will Prescott be doing that anyway? Well somebody had better otherwise it's no new taxes for you sonny!
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