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House Price Crash Forum

simpleton

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About simpleton

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    HPC Poster

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    Somerset
  1. There's a technical term for that. It's called being "bankrupt"
  2. Purchase as many old scrap mark III and IV Cortinas as he can afford. Melt them down, spray them yellow, then sell them at 100,000,000,000,000 % profit to BTLers as ingots of purest gold. Bank the enormous profits. Do not pass go. Next question?
  3. Couldn't agree more. When you can't pay your mortgage, banks and building societies NEVER : 1/Issue a writ against you. 2/Take you to court 3/Repocess the property 4/Evict you 5/Sell it at auction for a knock-down price 6/Hunt you down like a dog for years to reclaim the shortfall Who are you trying to convince? Us, or yourself? P.S Your avatar. Is he (a)Just about to start or (b)Just finished Chugging a c0ck?
  4. I'm curious. What's it like to be such a toadying, lick-spittle of a company man? I've never heard such a line of crap. A limited company exists purely in order to enrich it's shareholders. If has neither a soul to damn or a body to kick. Do you honestly imagine they'll have the slightest compunction about getting shot of you when the numbers don't stack up any more? That's just business, I'm afraid. You'll learn.
  5. Please no - for the love of God, don't encourage him to post any more of his back-of-fag-packet calculations. They make me come over all queer.
  6. Wild guess.... At parties, when you start chatting to strangers, do they mutter an excuse about needing another drink after a couple of minutes, and edge away?
  7. I'm curious. Just how far up your own ar$e do you need to be before you start cheering on....... an oil company?
  8. Bit off topic, chaps, but just wanted to reiterate something another poster mentioned on this thread..... Rinoa is the sock-puppet alter ego of a poster called Columbo on The Other Site. What's he doing here? Well over there he's been reduced to the status of Comedy Prancing Monkey. And that's by the few posters who haven't got him on ignore. God, no wonder he had to come over here. Fresh blood to annoy.... and all that.
  9. 350,000 jobs? Dear God, please let mine be one of them. Been 'ere a year and I have never been so bored - or indeed realised that such blank, head-crushing, mind numbing levels of pointless grinding tedium could even exist. I am at zero degrees Kelvin, minus two hundred and seventy odd degrees centigrade of boredom. Absolute boredom. They told me they wanted an accountant. No. What they actually want is a kick up the ****.
  10. Lunchtimes, I sometimes take a little stroll down my local High Street. A few months ago a little detached cottage caught my eye, advertised in the window of an estate agent. Nothing all that special. Not all that big, but it had that quality..... Quaint Needed "some improvement," apparently. My interest mildly piqued, I shuffled inside to make some enquiries. Oh yes! Had a lot of interest in this one! What's that you say....? Yes, it needs new a kitchen and bathroom.... and windows... We could possibly manage to "fit you in" for a viewing next week. I uttered an inward groan, and trudged wearily away. Never - when you're buying something, put yourself in the position of humble supplicant pleading for the opportunity to make an offer. Estate agents? I shit 'em. Here's a handy little tip. How can you tell when one's lying to you? Their lips are moving. That cottage. It's still in the window.
  11. Not a difficult one to answer. They're either : (1) Thick or (2) Desperate Ask me another.
  12. There is a strange poetry about Sibley's posts. Could he be an idiot savant? No? Or just an idiot?
  13. Sibley! Be honest. Have you been eating dung again?
  14. Actually, I was just bumbling around doing a few odd jobs, and I realised why there isn't anyone capable of putting forward a cogent, persuasive argument as to why house price inflation is likely to resume. It's because there isn't a sensible argument to be made. The dizzy level of lending needed to fuel UK house prices at 2007 prices left our financial institutions facing write downs and liabilities large enough to threaten their ability to operate on a day to day basis. Come off it, for God's sake. House prices have been drifting downwards over a period when interest rates have been at an all time low. What ON EARTH do you think is going to happen when they start to go back up? So, anyway, in a circular kind of logic - if there isn't a sensible case to be made for the return of house price inflation, then the only people making that case are gonna be (a) A bit sweaty and desperate - or (2)Just not that bright.
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