THE CONDUIT

It could well be a sign that somebody, ahem, should ask what The Message is.

Oh no, foolish child, this is not true. Firstly, I am only a one-way conduit. I can receive HIS messages but not vice versa. A two-way conduit is hard to find and very expensive, especially if you are after High Definition. HE is not made of money, you know. Secondly, the will need not be directed at HIM but at those that hold HIM in suspension. Again, I am impotent in this matter. I am but a humble conduit (you would call me a "new member") and so am not allowed to send messages to those that rule this place. What is needed is for the millions and millions of HIS followers to send The Message to those that rule the place you call HPC.

And here is another of the Wise Men. Yes, Master Scunnered. This is indeed true. Although will alone is just a part of it. Those that hold HIM captive must be persuaded to set HIM free.

Behold. Here is one of the Wise Men who will play a role in HIS rebirth.

Foolish child. HE is not some simple ape. HE has MILLIONS AND MILLIONS of followers.

HE is not some character from your childhood television. HE is the GREAT ONE.

And here is one who has forgotten that you must never, NEVER, take one of HIS wise sayings and speak it with your own humble tongue.

And yet here is one who clearly remembers HIM but who, with the passing of time, has developed an ill-founded bravado. When HE returns, you shall be checked into the most righteous of hostelries.

Can it be that there are posters so young and ignorant that they do not know who HE is? This can be the only explanation. Otherwise, the very thought of HIS Bottom would render them speechless with fear. And the notion of HIS mighty Elbow would render their shpincters impotent with dread.

Those that mock him must repent. For surely, the smacketh will be layed down upon them from on high. That is, if HE is freed. For HE is trapped and cannot escape.

Indeed, there is a faint smell on the breeze. But that is all. HE is trapped between this world and the next in a state of suspension.

He is trapped between this world and the next, in a state of SUSPENSION. He cannot call for help because He is unable to send messages. Only I, as a conduit for Him can hear His cries. But I am but a humble man and not permitted to message those who hold him captive.

If you call Him, He will come. If you can get his account un-suspened, He will come. Come in Number 99, Your time has come!